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01/09/2009


Report: Madonna Going on Salmon 'Retox'

Madonna

This is amusing, if not disgusting:

"Madonna has embarked on a January salmon 'retox' regime to 'knock 12 years off her appearance'. The 50-year-old singer is so determined to make herself look younger she has enlisted the help of health experts who have devised a new programme for her packed with the oily fish. A source said: 'The new 'retox' means she has got a more cardio-intensive gym regime and a diet overhaul. She will also be eating a lot more salmon as it's got age-defying properties. Her aim is to knock 12 years off her appearance.'"

Posted 1:11 PM EST by Andy Towle in Food & Drink, Madonna, News | Permalink


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  1. Knocking 12 years off her appearance will bring it back down to her actual age--is that what she's hoping for?

    Posted by: David D. | Jan 9, 2009 1:20:35 PM


  2. Madonna, meet Michael Jackson!

    Posted by: Jack M | Jan 9, 2009 1:20:50 PM


  3. Why is eating salmon disgusting?

    I prefer white fish myself. But I have had some pretty decent salmon dinners.

    Posted by: crispy | Jan 9, 2009 1:31:22 PM


  4. It's hilarious what the media will make up.

    She could be doing this but her aim of "knocking 12 years off her appearance..." makes it sound like a fast food order:

    "I'd like the 12 years off combo with the associated eye lift and spider vein removal."

    Posted by: victor | Jan 9, 2009 1:32:06 PM


  5. I didn't think it was all that "amusing," but exactly how is this "disgusting," Andy? I don't see it.

    Posted by: David Vickers | Jan 9, 2009 1:32:42 PM


  6. Come on, this is just gossip.

    Also, Madonna is over 50 years old. What do people expect? She's very muscularly fit, better than most women half her age.

    Posted by: noah | Jan 9, 2009 1:35:52 PM


  7. Maybe she should talk to Jeremy Piven before embarking on this latest diet.

    Posted by: MT | Jan 9, 2009 1:36:30 PM


  8. And I was worried about the conflict in Gaza.

    Silly me.

    Posted by: thespeck | Jan 9, 2009 1:37:19 PM


  9. i'd be concerned with elevated uric acid levels, and the possibility of gout.... ouch.

    Posted by: john | Jan 9, 2009 1:37:47 PM


  10. How long until Lourdes finds the portrait of Dorian Madonna in the attic?

    Posted by: patrick nyc | Jan 9, 2009 1:41:19 PM


  11. She creeps me out with her manic, controlling ways.

    That constant need to ALWAYS be in the spotlight, to never go away for a while and come back. Attention to her is like oxygen. She would die without it.

    Without any career lows or comebacks - her career is not interesting, like say Cher (with an Oscar, TV, radio, highs and major lows - including a very laughable and entertaining infomercial).

    She is just like a well-oiled (fish oil) machine.

    Anyway - if she wants to stay young she should actually put on some fat. Starting with her gnarled hands.

    Posted by: Andy Z | Jan 9, 2009 1:46:22 PM


  12. cant she just devour a newborn babe or bath in the blood of a virgin like all the other harpies!?

    Posted by: Toto | Jan 9, 2009 2:00:26 PM


  13. Slutinator, Slutinator, Baby you're a Trampolator.

    Now you'll be an oily old almost-was: the World's only "movie star" without one hit movie. But then again you managed to convince the gullible masses of twinks to buy tickets to your so aptly, yet unintentionally, named recent tour.

    At least with the new regime you'll come pre-lubed and will no longer need MysticTan after ingesting all that food coloring.

    Now where is Mattie defending your honour?

    Posted by: rudy | Jan 9, 2009 2:04:16 PM


  14. I love Madonna but TOTO's comment cracked me up.

    Posted by: sparks | Jan 9, 2009 2:11:05 PM


  15. Faggots!

    Posted by: Nathan | Jan 9, 2009 2:11:47 PM


  16. Jeez...what is with all the Madonna hate?! She's been nothing but a friend to the GLBT community.

    Posted by: peterparker | Jan 9, 2009 2:29:18 PM


  17. I want to be the reporter who gets assigned to make this stuff up. Hilarious!

    Posted by: Ben | Jan 9, 2009 2:30:51 PM


  18. It'd be cheaper and more effective for her to commission a portrait from Oscar Wilde. Can't we find a better icon?

    Posted by: www.gaygregator.com | Jan 9, 2009 2:31:59 PM


  19. Peter because unfortunately some gays are just plain ignorant Jackasses.Its the truth!!!

    Posted by: DJ | Jan 9, 2009 2:40:55 PM


  20. Just like the str8 losers

    Posted by: DJ | Jan 9, 2009 2:42:14 PM


  21. The body of Norma Desmond, the face of Baby Jane Hudson.

    Lord... Gloomy Friday, baby. Help me, somebody!

    Posted by: Derrick from Philly | Jan 9, 2009 2:43:47 PM


  22. Derrick from Philly, You forget "and the ethics of Crystal Allen". Perk up, tea time is just a couple of hours away!

    Posted by: rudy | Jan 9, 2009 2:53:18 PM


  23. Next stop, Geico commercial...

    Posted by: CJ | Jan 9, 2009 2:56:20 PM


  24. Does the Kaballah (sp?) forbid plastic surgery? Or has she had bad luck in that regard? Or is she just trying to make Guy Ritchie jealous?

    Maybe she should call Phyillis Diller for some referrals.

    Posted by: Paul R | Jan 9, 2009 2:56:44 PM


  25. Hush your mouths -- i LOVE Madonna!
    She has been loudly pro-gay for 25 years.

    Madge baby, here's a much easier way to look 25 years younger -- date a 70 year-old.

    I call it the Zeta-Jones diet.

    Posted by: Strepsi | Jan 9, 2009 2:56:45 PM


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