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UK Teen Hangs Himself After Anti-Gay Bullying

Another teen lost to anti-gay bullying, this time in the UK. 16-year-old Anthony Stubbs' body was found in the woods near his home, six weeks after he had disappeared. He had hanged himself. His mother says it was because of anti-gay bullying:

StubbsStill, grieving Denise Machin believes she knows the reason very well. She blames the bullying girls who hounded him about his sexuality, and his own inner struggle with his feelings.

Denise, 34, says: “Anthony was getting bullied by girls for two years. He would get shouted ‘gay boy’ at, get slapped in the face, come home with his school jumper ripped and even got his phone stolen. He would be upset but pick himself up and go back the next day.

“I spoke to his teachers about it, but Anthony begged me not to get involved because it was making it worse and he’d get embarrassed.”

He had told his mother he was bisexual:

“Anthony was obviously experimenting, finding out who he was.” They reported Anthony missing on November 26, and on December 30 Denise and Charlotte gave an emotional press conference begging the teenager to come home.

But Denise admits now: “The press conference I did was awful — I knew deep down he wasn’t coming back. I just couldn’t feel him in my heart any more. I knew something serious had happened.”

When police found his body, Denise was almost relieved — especially because of the note he left.

It reads: “Well, I’m gone but not completely. I will be watching over you and making sure you make the right choices. And don’t forget me, I’m in heaven looking down. Please don’t grieve and try to move on as best you can, I love you all so very much.’

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Comments

  1. Rest in Peace, dear boy.

    Posted by: Tom | Feb 7, 2013 12:19:33 PM


  2. Parents are going to have to take their kids out of school. If your child is gender nonconforming, non-heterosexual or cis-gendered and he or she is being bullied and traumatized, take them out of the school and find a way to place them somewhere else or homeschool them. Obviously the school atmosphere worldwide is incredibly anti-gay overall and thus simply going back to school every day to be abused and demoralized and hated cannot continue. I read that this young boy also had a kid and was a dad but was looking at gay porn and was caught once by his mom. Seems like a case of not just bullying but self-hatred and wanting to be straight. Of course, bullying does that to a young boy.

    RIP Anthony Stubbs. Another one down. How many more are going to be taken away from us?

    Posted by: Francis | Feb 7, 2013 12:29:16 PM


  3. This event is as painful as all the rest. The goodbye note makes it unbearable.

    No young person should feel so hopeless, and be in such pain inflicted by a bunch of cruel motha' f.ckas.

    He believed in an afterlife, and decided he'd be better off there. For him, I pray he's right.

    Posted by: Derrick from Philly | Feb 7, 2013 12:29:32 PM


  4. So incredibly sad.

    Posted by: Alistair | Feb 7, 2013 12:33:39 PM


  5. Shoulda beat those b*tches with a bat.

    Posted by: TL1878 | Feb 7, 2013 12:37:32 PM


  6. Francis,

    "Cis-gendered" means that a person is a biologically male or female who presents the same gender as their sex. I think you meant "transgendered."

    And, no, people shouldn't have to pull their kids out of school. Instead, school should enforce anti-bullying measures and discipline bullies. After this mother complained to the school, the principal should have crushed the monsters.

    Posted by: Jim | Feb 7, 2013 12:38:59 PM


  7. Great reporting here... Another site lists him having a 4 month old baby girl.

    Posted by: KsBrian | Feb 7, 2013 12:43:07 PM


  8. RIP. So sad.

    Posted by: Matt26 | Feb 7, 2013 12:44:48 PM


  9. Heartbreak. Heartbreak. Heartbreak.

    What is overwhelming is my fear that what we are all witnessing may only be the proverbial tip of the iceberg.How many cases never make it to the public ? How many families lose a loved child and suffer in the silence........maybe even covering up the true reasons for the suicide ?

    So let's Stand Up; let's not be shamed into going back into any closet, whether in Russia or elsewhere.
    These kids need many gay examples as a support mechanism; they need to have the self esteem that they see in other gay men.

    And those vicious vixens .....the gay kids need to keep away from the manipulators.

    Posted by: JackFknTwist | Feb 7, 2013 12:57:48 PM


  10. "Great reporting here... Another site lists him having a 4 month old baby girl."


    So does the story in the link. What's your point KSBRIAN?

    Posted by: BETTY | Feb 7, 2013 12:58:01 PM


  11. @KSBRIAN,

    That certainly adds some light to this story. Who did he have the baby with? One of the girls harassing him? Assuming this report of him having an infant is accurate.

    Another interesting aspect of this story is he was being 'bullied' by girls, which IMO is just as common as bullying by boys, in my observations girls and women can often be even worse than boys and men, but our P.C. obsessed culture often refuse to acknowledge this.

    And I know this is going to get some people's panties in a bunch, but what kind of home/family life did Anthony have? Is his father around? In these cases it would seem the majority of time it's always mom morning, speaking with the media, having candle light vigils and so-on. If my child was going through bad times, if he/she made some mistakes, if he/she was being harassed, I would be very much in their lives and being as proactive as possible, especially if I knew he/she were seriously depressed/suicidal, were taking psychiatric meds, and so-on.

    And I'm sorry if this offends some, but really only another male can really appreciate and understand what a young man like Anthony is and was dealing with as they turn from boyhood to adulthood. Mom's mean well, but they can really only sympathize and try and understand, not truly appreciate and empathize. This is a major problem in our society and similar societies with many broken families. It's one of the main causes of so much dysfunctional and antisocial behavior especially among boys and young men.

    Posted by: ratbastard | Feb 7, 2013 12:58:45 PM


  12. Sorry, Jim, yeah. I meant non-cis gendered. Sorry. Mental block, sad about this story, not thinking.

    Posted by: Francis | Feb 7, 2013 1:01:19 PM


  13. Jim, you're right, parents theoretically shouldn't have to pull their kids from class, but at the end of the day, the well-being of that kid comes first. They shouldn't have to deal with hate on a daily basis, continuously, and wait and hope the principal and teachers do something. But the first step is, of course, a parent emphatic that they WILL NOT allow their child be abused and that something must be done to ensure that they feel comfortable within the halls and classrooms of school. And if nothing is done, you're going to sue. And parents of LGBTQ children need to talk to the parents of bullies, too and let them know their kids are being a**holes. That's step one, but you need to have exit strategies.

    Posted by: Francis | Feb 7, 2013 1:12:58 PM


  14. When does suisde stop being the better alternative?

    So many good people have helped to stop suisides, push back on bullying, and advance human dignity for LGBT. But it never seems to be enough. When is it going to count? When does it really change? What needs to happen?

    Its past sick to read about yet another suiside and the waste of even more potential.

    Posted by: OMG | Feb 7, 2013 1:18:20 PM


  15. "And I'm sorry if this offends some, but really only another male can really appreciate and understand what a young man like Anthony is and was dealing with as they turn from boyhood to adulthood."

    Ratbastard,

    there is some truth in you total comment, but there are some "fathers" who have threatened to kill their sons for being Gay or Transgender. And probably some Gay boys (especially gender role non-conforming boys) have indeed been murdered for that reason.

    There are "fathers" who tried to beat the Gayness out of their sons. Many Gays and Transfolk who leave home in their early teens leave because their lives are in danger from their fathers, and sometimes their mothers also.

    Posted by: Derrick from Philly | Feb 7, 2013 1:31:49 PM


  16. Scratch what I asked about his infant's mom, I see she wasn't one of the girls.

    Posted by: ratbastard | Feb 7, 2013 1:33:38 PM


  17. @Derrick,

    Yes, I'm of course aware there are fathers who assault their boys for being gay, disown them, and what-not. Goes without saying. There are mothers who do likewise. IT HELPS TO HAVE A RESPONSIBLE FATHER or at least reliable, responsible adult male 'father-figure' in a child's and young adult's life. Moms can only do so much. It's the whole yin and yang thing.

    Posted by: ratbastard | Feb 7, 2013 1:37:03 PM


  18. This is when I wish I could hug and love every single one of these kids.

    I wish horrible guilt and pain on those who tortured this boy. I know it's not nice, but I hate those girls. I hate the bullies. I wish we could simply reflect back to them the pain and anguish they inflict so they could feel and experience it and beg for forgiveness.

    Posted by: Lizzie | Feb 7, 2013 1:44:28 PM


  19. And RIP to Anthony, but who reading this doesn't think becoming a father at 16 [with an 18 year old GF] says a lot about what was going on his life, his home life, his social environment, etc.? Who doesn't think that maybe this was what really sent him over the edge? I checked some of the British news sites that are reporting on this, and most are extremely casual regarding a 16 year old and 18 year old having a baby and living together to raise a child. It of course is ridiculous, they are both still basically children, although the 18 year old girl is technically an adult. It was common 100 years ago when our societies were far more rural and life expectancies were short, and there was no such thing as welfare [food stamps, housing, heathcare, wic, SSI, SSDI, etc., in the U.S.] and mom and dad and grandparents needed kids and grandkids to help them when they no longer could help themselves.

    And this has NOTHING to do with the availability of birth control, sexual ignorance, even abortion. It has a lot more to do with a girl/young woman who needs a child in order to have something to love that will unconditionally love her back and is under her control, and as a way of keeping a BF around, and I suppose as a way of getting $benefits$. Why do we all just stop kidding ourselves and cut the PC BS. You know what I wrote is basically true.

    Posted by: ratbastard | Feb 7, 2013 2:09:13 PM


  20. RIP Anthony. So sad.

    Posted by: Adam | Feb 7, 2013 2:30:49 PM


  21. So sad, RIP Anthony. We will miss you.

    Posted by: RobWest | Feb 7, 2013 2:46:09 PM


  22. The bullies need to be held personally accountable for this. That means prison time. Nothing will change otherwise.

    Posted by: Randy | Feb 7, 2013 3:07:12 PM


  23. Yet another story in which the bullies' identities are deliberately concealed. Why are these criminals never named? The mother should hold another press conference and read the names of the bullies, one by one.

    Posted by: Craig | Feb 7, 2013 3:31:49 PM


  24. @Randy and Craig,

    The 'bullies' did not put a rope around Anthony's neck, Anthony did. I'm not defending the 'bullies' but let's deal with reality here. And Anthony had a lot on his plate for a 16 year old; this also seems lie a recurring theme in these suicides.

    Posted by: ratbastard | Feb 7, 2013 3:46:35 PM


  25. The UK also has infamously strict libel laws. I wouldn't suggest Anthony's mom publicly name his 'killers'.

    Posted by: ratbastard | Feb 7, 2013 3:48:09 PM


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