Alan Cumming | News | Video | Woody Allen

Dear Aspiring Actors, Don't Do What Alan Cumming Did To Woody Allen: VIDEO

Worst_audition

In a web-exclusive for The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, bisexual actor Alan Cummings shared his tale of botching an otherwise semi-decent audition with director Woody Allen:

So I went to meet Woody Allen for a part in one of his films a long time ago, and the casting director said to me “Don’t worry. He does very quick meetings. Don’t worry too much. He just says hello, he looks at you — really very quick.”

So I go into the room, and there’s Woody Allen. And first of all, I’m 40 years too young or 20 years too young for this part. I don’t know why I’m there… so I start reading and I start to think, Woody is way over in another corner of the room behind a pillar looking at me… And I start reading with the casting director, and I do quite well, I’m kinda nailing it, I think I’m doing quite well.

And as I’m reading it, I realize it’s going well, Woody starts to come nearer and nearer like and animal coming to nibble at something you’ve left out for it. And he’s sorta fascinated by me. And he gets right up to me and I finish the thing, and he goes, “Are you available in the summer?”

And I’m like “Yes, yes…” I thought, “My god, I totally nailed this....

Watch Alan’s interview to see what happened next, AFTER THE JUMP…

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Comments

  1. I can relate. I've never lost a part because of it, but I am very much a "hugger", and a fairly enthusiastic one at that. For the most part in the theatre community where I live, that's an accepted form of greeting or expression of congratulations, etc. Even many of the straight men seem to have no problem with it. I have run into a few, however, who tend to tense up at the prospect of being hugged (by ANYONE, not just other men), and I have to keep a constant inventory in my head of who I have to offer a handshake or "fistbump" rather than a warm embrace.

    Posted by: DALE | Apr 29, 2014 8:31:25 PM


  2. Strange a child rapist would feel violated by a simple hug.

    Posted by: JMC | Apr 29, 2014 8:58:04 PM


  3. Alan comes across as candid and adorable here. Woody? quite the opposite

    Posted by: Felix | Apr 29, 2014 9:21:06 PM


  4. Oh was woody charge as a child rapist???
    I must have missed that part of the story.
    That had nothing to do with the story. Your an ass!

    Posted by: jcmiles | Apr 29, 2014 9:27:30 PM


  5. Woody is weird. Alan might be lucky that he didn't get a part in one of his creepy movies.

    Posted by: David From Canada | Apr 29, 2014 10:07:23 PM


  6. It seems you missed basically every part of the story other than Woody's denial, JC. Child rapist is Woody Allen's master status, as it well should be.

    Posted by: JMC | Apr 29, 2014 10:46:44 PM


  7. Wonder what Mia would say...thank god he has money otherwise he'd be history.

    Posted by: Troy | Apr 29, 2014 11:01:02 PM


  8. @Troy Mia would probably run off to go to court to defend her good friend, convicted child rapist Roman Polanski, like she did after all the accusations against Allen. And if you don't find it exceedingly weird-- to say the least-- that a mother at the center of accusations against a man (Allen) who was neither tried nor convicted of molestation would turn around and then very publicly defend someone for whom there's no doubt, legally, that he (Polanski) did rape a minor, then I have some swampland to sell you. What kind of parent who firmly believed their child had been abused would then turn around and defend perhaps the world's most famous convicted purveyor of such abuse, as Farrow did for Polanski? Seriously, think about that for a minute.

    Posted by: bobbyjoe | Apr 29, 2014 11:27:05 PM


  9. Alan Cummimg is excellent on "The Good Wife". Such a funny character and he nails an American accent. He was awesome in "X2" as well as Nightcrawler and it's a shame he never reprised the role.

    Posted by: SpaceCadet | Apr 30, 2014 1:31:36 AM


  10. For Liz Smith to say that Mia Farrow is weird is really saying something.

    Posted by: me | Apr 30, 2014 2:28:14 AM


  11. Oh for god's sake! are people here stupid enough to actually believe the ludicrous accusations that lunatic Mia Farrow made against her ex-BF?

    Absolutely NO evidence was ever found of his having molested his daughter. And a year-long investigation was done by the police. What they DID find was that Mia Farrow's daughter's descriptions were inconsistent and contradictory, and that she sounded as though she had been coached to say what she did *cough*Mia*.

    Meanwhile, Mia Farrow has defended not only Roman Polanski, a CONVICTED paedophile, but HER OWN BROTHER who is in jail after being found guilty of child molestation.

    Other than Mia's completely baseless accusations, there has never been any evidence to demonstrate that Woody Allen has any sexual proclivity whatsoever for children.

    Posted by: Mikey | Apr 30, 2014 3:28:52 AM


  12. Woody Allen is a disgusting pervert.

    Whether or not he molested his daughter Dylan is irrelevant to his status as a disgusting pervert.

    He had an affair with his children's sister Soon Yi (his girllfriend's teenage daughter) with whom he was in a position of authority over.

    He is a disgusting man.

    Posted by: MaryM | Apr 30, 2014 5:05:54 AM


  13. Mia Farrow is unhinged.

    Posted by: Paul | Apr 30, 2014 6:02:34 AM


  14. THANK YOU, MARYM!!! Mia, Woody, Roman - all crazy. Why anyone would waste valuable time trying to convince themselves otherwise is a rather sad mystery.

    Posted by: D.R.H. | Apr 30, 2014 7:25:22 AM


  15. Its interesting how quickly these comments go completely off topic. As for Alan Cumming, its very weird to hear his Scottish accent after watching him weekly on The Good Wife (the best show with the worst name on television)

    Posted by: BlahBlahBlah | Apr 30, 2014 9:43:43 AM


  16. Whether or not Mia is unhinged has no bearing on Woody Allen being a disgusting pervert.

    Marrying his children's sister (his girlfriend's daughter) is sick beyond belief.

    And of course his own daughter has accused him of molesting her.

    Posted by: MaryM | Apr 30, 2014 9:58:07 AM


  17. Of all the people in the world I'd NOT effusively want to hug, Woody Allen is high on the list. He's a brilliant talent, but not exactly cuddly. (He's also written several good lesbian or bisexual women parts, but only one decent gay male role, in "Radio Days." In 40-some pictures, that ain't much.)

    Posted by: Dback | Apr 30, 2014 10:30:19 AM


  18. @MARYM: He married the 21 year old adoptive daughter of his ex-girlfriend. A young woman with whom he was NEVER in a position of authority (she was already much older than Mia's other children), a young woman who NEVER lived in the same house as him, and a young woman that EVERYONE who knew them says was distant from Allen for most of her life.

    Soon-Yi started spending time with Woody when she was 19 or so (her exact age is difficult to assess, as her birth records were destroyed in her country of origin), and this was AT MIA'S URGING. Mia Farrow is the one who wanted Woody to spend time with the now-adult Soon-Yi.

    As for "his own daughter" accusing him, she was carefully coached by Mia. This was the finding of all of the social workers, psychologists, and police investigators who worked for over a year on the case associated with Mia Farrow's false accusations.

    Woody Allens' own son defended his father, saying that Mia Farrow had coached his younger sister (he was 16 at the time of the alleged molestation).

    The SINGLE day where this supposed molestation occurred was days before a custody hearing. An odd choice for a molestation, isn't it? In an attic in which Woody had always refused to go (he's terribly claustrophobic, a well-known fact that is amply documented). In a house FULL of guests and family members?

    If Woody was SO hard up for a bit of kiddy diddling, he'd have done it before, and again after. One would HAVE to believe that if he was risking everything at such a public venue to molest his daughter, that he would actually do it again when LESS risk was involved.

    And yet... no. There were never ANY other accusations against him. His daughter never said he molested her at any other moment. No one has ever come forth with any further accusations.

    As for your being creeped out that he and Soon-Yi married, well, they've been married for how long now? 17 years? And have children of their own.

    Meanwhile, let's not forget that Mia Farrow has suggested that she had an affair with Frank Sinatra and that her son with Woody Allen is in fact Frank Sinatra's son.

    But I guess you won't let facts get in the way of your feminazi opinion. If he's a man, he's got to be guilty. No ifs, ands, or buts. People like you are the reason men get their lives destroyed by false accusations.

    Posted by: Mikey | Apr 30, 2014 11:19:34 AM


  19. Oh Woody.

    Posted by: ROSEMARY WOODHOUSE | Apr 30, 2014 3:07:10 PM


  20. Strange that a bunch of gay men have such judgment about matters that they know little about. Or not so strange I suppose given what this community seems mostly interested in.

    Posted by: Alex N | Apr 30, 2014 6:15:41 PM


  21. If Alan is bisexual, I'm a tree.

    Posted by: Rodney | May 1, 2014 2:42:43 PM


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