California | Log Cabin Republicans

Democratic Congressional Candidate, Gay Blogger, and Log Cabin Republicans Tangle Over the Term 'Mary'

Letter

After a public request from the Log Cabin Republicans, Democratic Congressman Scott Peters has removed a link to a blog post by gay activist and blogger John Aravosis calling Peters’ gay Republican opponent Carl DeMaio “pejorative gay slurs” like “Mary.”

LogpologyThe LCR added:

The piece originally was posted on AmericaBlog and contained false and grossly-distorted claims about DeMaio’s record on LGBT issues.

“There is no doubt that if the roles were reversed and a straight Republican congressman promoted content on his website calling his gay Democratic opponent a ‘Mary,’ there would be no end to the outrage from the left,” said Log Cabin Republicans Executive Director Gregory T. Angelo. “Of course, when a Democrat does it, no one raises an eyebrow—but we’re not going to let this slide.”

The LCR also requested an apology, calling Peters a bully and claiming "wild inaccuracies and untruths" in Aravosis’ article. At this time of writing, Peters has not issued and apology nor has the LCR pointed out any of their alleged “wild inaccuracies and untruths” or other "slurs."

In the blistering critique of Carl DeMaio that started this whole kerfuffle, Aravosis’ wrote:

San Diego’s gay Republican city council member, Carl DeMaio, can’t figure out why the religious right, who he tacitly sides with on the culture wars, is more supportive of him than gays, whose civil rights he refuses to promote in office.

DeMaio is now running for Congress.

“I’ve found more tolerance, acceptance and inclusion from social conservative groups who have to reconcile that I’m a Republican who happens to be gay… versus the intolerance the LGBT leaders see me as a gay man who happens to be a Republican,” DeMaio said.

Oh Mary, it’s so hard to be you.

Aravosis then lambasted DeMaio’s gay-baiting of a pro-gay political opponent and counterproductive work against LGBT rights. Aravosis said, “the Victory Fund, which supports gay GOP candidates, won’t touch DeMaio because, you know, they kind of have this requirement that you actually do something to support your own civil rights,” and added, “DeMaio refused to even speak out against Proposition 8, which took place in his own state.”

In a follow-up post responding to LCR’s public request, Aravosis says:

“Apparently, Lob Cabin isn’t terribly familiar with “the gay lifestyle,” as Carl DeMaio’s friends on the religious right like to call it, if they think calling someone “Mary” is a slur. The only people who ever call gay people “Mary” is other gay people. And it’s not a slur, it’s actually often a term of ironic endearment (note the title).

But then again, we shouldn’t expect anti-gay gays to actually understand, support or defend a culture that their own political party and candidates have long sought to destroy.”

Aravosis continued, “If DeMaio isn’t anti-gay, then let him answer these questions” and then posted 10 yes or no questions about DeMaio’s positions on gay rights.

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Comments

  1. Any New Yorker old enough to have been an adult when oh-so-liberal Mario Cuomo ran for Governor against Ed Kock will remember well, the "Vote for Cuomo, not the Homo" unofficial slogan that Cuomo's operatives spread around.

    Granted, that was the 80's, but "liberal" Democrats have a long history of using homophobia to their advantage when it suits their purposes.

    Even Deblazio parading his wife and family around in last year's mayoral primary as a subtle reminder to the voters that he was heterosexual and his principal rival was a lesbian....was an example of that.....as Alec Baldwin's rants.

    "Liberals" are often just as homophobic as conservatives are, even when they are more supportive at an "official" policy level.

    Posted by: Rick | May 7, 2014 11:28:53 AM


  2. Any New Yorker old enough to have been an adult when oh-so-liberal Mario Cuomo ran for Governor against Ed Kock will remember well, the "Vote for Cuomo, not the Homo" unofficial slogan that Cuomo's operatives spread around.

    Granted, that was the 80's, but "liberal" Democrats have a long history of using homophobia to their advantage when it suits their purposes.

    Even Deblazio parading his wife and family around in last year's mayoral primary as a subtle reminder to the voters that he was heterosexual and his principal rival was a lesbian....was an example of that.....as Alec Baldwin's rants.

    "Liberals" are often just as homophobic as conservatives are, even when they are more supportive at an "official" policy level.

    Posted by: Rick | May 7, 2014 11:28:54 AM


  3. I guess it's easier than the LCR boys actually having to confront and address the actual legit and heinous ongoing anti-gay bigotry within the GOP, eh? Yes - lets demand an apology over "Mary" - and ignore pretty much every anti gay statement and policy the GOP and its leaders continue to support and promote.

    Posted by: Little Kiwi | May 7, 2014 11:29:43 AM


  4. And Kiwis's comment above is a perfect example of how the gay Far Left is always more than happy to comfort and make excuses for homophobes as long as they embrace their Far Left agenda.......because they want gay people to be confined to the Far Left plantation, regardless of the negative consequences it has.....

    Posted by: Rick | May 7, 2014 11:37:28 AM


  5. Oh, Mary please! (Directed at all LCR members who demanded these actions). There is absolutely nothing homophobic about using a camp term from one gay man to another. And if DeMaio hadn't actually worked against LGBT equality and sided with the homophobes himself, he wouldn't be facing scorn from fellow gay people. See Catania, David in DC for an example of a conservative who still manages to be pro equality.

    Posted by: CPT_Doom | May 7, 2014 11:41:21 AM


  6. Hey Rick! I'm openly gay and have been since I was in high school. Why are you still Closeted in your fifties? Ready to finally "man up" and post from a place of visibility? No? Didn't think so.

    How many Americans will suffer today because someone said "Mary?" Not nearly as many as those who will suffer due to the GOs continued promotion of bigotry, ignorance, and outright hatred.

    I know this is near impossible for GOP-suckup eunuchs to process, but that's not my problem. I'm an openly gay liberal. How telling that this sites "gay conservative commenters" have the strength
    And integrity of a bowl of mashed potatoes.

    *elegant curtsy*

    Happy summer, y'all! Come to Toronto for world pride!
    http://littlekiwilovesbauhaus.blogspot.com/2014/04/are-pride-parades-too-sexual-is-there.html

    Posted by: Little Kiwi | May 7, 2014 11:45:33 AM


  7. gay republicans = black KKK

    Posted by: litper | May 7, 2014 11:46:07 AM


  8. Hi Mary! http://youtu.be/Cxrf-EVT35E

    Posted by: ROSEMARY WOODHOUSE | May 7, 2014 11:48:59 AM


  9. Hey Gurl!
    "Don't call me Gurl!"
    Calm down, Mary.
    "Don't call me Mary!!"
    Blanche, please.
    "Hate crime!!!"

    Cpt-doom gets it. As always, the sites cowards don't.

    This is just way for the LCR to do what "Rick"
    Does - find a distraction from the reality that their political allies, and blood family, are not actually supportive of them.

    Posted by: Little Kiwi | May 7, 2014 11:49:33 AM


  10. Plantation, really Rick? That's really what springs to mind when defending right-wing Marys.

    And, no, liberals aren't just as often homophobic, or the party platform would resemble something entirely different.

    Posted by: Just Stop | May 7, 2014 11:53:06 AM


  11. sorry, but carl demaio and his opportunistic and shady gold-digger of a boyfriend are idiots. they are not well liked in san diego. and for good reason.

    Posted by: fsinsd | May 7, 2014 11:54:30 AM


  12. DeMaio calling foul for this is like the anti-gay bigots calling for tolerance. They want something they don't think should be offered to anyone else. It's the height of hypocrisy. DeMaio is an anti-gay candidate. The fact that he IS gay doesn't change that. No, the gay community is not supporting him. Why should we? The more I learn about him the more I am sure I am right about my initial assessment of him. Ed Koch was another anti-gay gay. I don't feel any too sorry for him. He's a villain and not worthy of pity because he's gay. He wouldn't even meet with anyone about AIDS while he was mayor. Thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster he never became governor.

    Posted by: Houndentenor | May 7, 2014 11:59:09 AM


  13. I hope that the voters of San Diego re-elect Scott Peters, who has been advocate for LGBT equality. Gay as she may be, Mary isn't on our side.

    http://lgbtweekly.com/2014/04/08/hrc-endorses-scott-peters-for-congress/

    Posted by: Douglas | May 7, 2014 12:02:51 PM


  14. Aravosis is such a touwat. He censors his comment section for point of view. I got blocked because I said that gay people in San Francisco were as racist as anyone else, evidenced by their residential patterns, contempt for black neighborhoods, and ritual avoidance of Oakland.

    Posted by: enchantra | May 7, 2014 12:57:30 PM


  15. There is probably a cultural difference due to age. I don't think gay guys under maybe 35 would know what Mary meant other than a girl's name... much less the context of whether it's considered to be an insult or endearment. I'm in my 50s and consider it an old fashioned way to say "honey," . It isn't a compliment,,, but it isn't an insult. Many people are uncomfortable with dealing with the feminine side of themselves,,, so any camp reference would be taken as an insult. Like someone getting insulted if you tried to hug or kiss a strange gay man instead of shaking hands. I can see where closeted people think it's an insult. If it makes people feel uncomfortable, that is enough for me to have John A issue an apology.. maybe "Hey, girl, sorry you took offense to being called Mary. Didn't mean it as an insult."

    Posted by: Steve Talbert | May 7, 2014 12:57:42 PM


  16. The LCR's, completely ineffectual, cloutless Marys since 1977. Instead of actually disputing Aravosis's claims--that DeMaio is a gay man with an anti-gay record--they get their panties in a twist about a blogger using Mary. No wonder they're incapable of scoring any political victories in decades of trying.

    Posted by: Ernie | May 7, 2014 1:05:55 PM


  17. Did you guys know that Rick and Enchantra are actually the same LCR troll? Kind of pathetic that he needs multiple aliases in order to get his point across that Liberals are somehow bad, despite insurmountable evidence that Liberals been at the forefront of LGBT rights in this country since, well, always.

    Posted by: Tyler | May 7, 2014 1:09:44 PM


  18. Steve:
    You are talking about me? I am a "Mary" but I don't like people call me that. Like a bigot doesn't like people calling them bigots. Or a moron being called a moron.

    Posted by: rick | May 7, 2014 1:21:18 PM


  19. Tyler - Enchantra is only Enchantra. In the past she was Endora and before that David. Not Rick, not Kiwi.

    Posted by: enchantra | May 7, 2014 1:22:40 PM


  20. I am especially offended when people call me a fairy.

    Posted by: rick | May 7, 2014 1:24:57 PM


  21. The bottom line is that like most minority groups, we don't like our laundry aired to the outside world. "Mary" is something we say amongst ourselves, albeit these days we say "Shaneequa".

    Posted by: enchantra | May 7, 2014 1:25:51 PM


  22. I have read about the inaccuracies when discussing DeMaio. No one has said what those inaccuracies are.

    Posted by: Mike in the Tundra | May 7, 2014 1:35:46 PM


  23. "The only people who ever call gay people “Mary” is other gay people."

    Umm no, the only gay people who call anyone Mary are on Social Security. And most of us have move past the feminizing terms Mary, Girl, Girlfriend, Miss Thang ect. Except for maybe drag queens.

    Posted by: Homo Genius | May 7, 2014 1:41:28 PM


  24. I think using a woman's name between gay guys is now just old people or drag queens. The older guys got in the habit so you could talk on the phone at work or in public about your friends and it would sound like you were possibly talking about your girlfriend.. or at least a woman, since the stories probably involved going home with guys...

    Don't know why Mary became a common reference instead of a specific name for someone. Maybe because Mary Mary quite contrary..?

    Posted by: Steve Talbert | May 7, 2014 3:11:55 PM


  25. Mary is like Clem ... tired and old. I've heard it in film, and that's about it. Real people don't use it.

    Posted by: Randy | May 7, 2014 4:44:10 PM


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