Seann William Scott's Adventure in the Outhouse

How actors choose what stories they're going to tell on the late night shows is a mystery to me but Seann William Scott is certainly carrying on the Stifler-ian tradition of potty humor. There are strange things going on in the Scott family backyard. Last night on Jimmy Kimmel, Scott told a scatological tale of a utopian world beyond our own.

Watch it, AFTER THE JUMP...

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Is Jimmy Kimmel F**king Richard Simmons?

Or the other way around?

One more shot AFTER THE JUMP...

Sorry to scare you so early in the morning. According to People these are shots from Kimmel's latest video: "In the new video, Kimmel isn’t uh, bleeping anyone, but getting whipped into shape by Simmons."

Previously
Jimmy Kimmel is F**king Ben Affleck! [tr]

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News: Ben Cohen, Ryerson, Bachelor, Illinois, Arctic Icecap

Bad sign for the future of the Arctic ice cap: thickest, oldest, toughest ice melting...

British rugby stud Ben Cohen releases details on a night with his gay fans: "'Moving away from the more traditional rugby testimonial theme, the Ben Cohen Testimonial Committee is holding a ground breaking event at The Dorchester in London,' his publicist Jill Tipping said. 'BENediction is an exclusive evening of fun, feasting and frivolity aimed primarily at including his legions of fans in the gay community in the testimonial celebrations. Guests are promised a 'whole host of treats and surprises making this event a real one off and not to be missed. Ben Cohen fans need to make sure that they reserve their places quickly as they are expected to snapped up fast,' Tipping said. Of course, we are not sure how far Cohen will take the concept of 'one off,' but he has never been shy about marketing his physical assets."

If you missed the first episode of this season's The Bachelor (and I have a feeling many of you did), you can catch up real quick: this mess was what it was all about.

AfterElton looks at Jimmy Kimmel and the gays.

Beckham power shops and rocks the plain white tee.

Central Illinois' only gay newspaper shuts its doors: "The Flame is out. After 111/2 years of publication, Prairie Flame, central Illinois’ only newspaper that concentrated solely on gay issues and events, has called it a day...Volunteers distributed copies of each edition over much of the state, from Springfield to the Quad Cities, Joliet, Champaign and Effingham. Circulation was more than 8,000, and there were more than 200 places where the free newspaper could be found. But production costs kept rising, and ad revenue could not keep up."

Anderson Cooper underwent surgery for skin cancer: "I’ve been off for the last couple of days. I had minor surgery on Monday. I hadn’t planned on mentioning this, but I still have stitches and you’ll no doubt notice them tonight. Don’t want you to think I got into a fist fight with Charlie Rose."

Manchester United's Cristiano Ronaldo under fire for bullfight commercial: "The advertisement, for Fuji Xerox, shows the Portuguese winger taunting the bull with a football in the manner of a matador with a cape."

Ryerson University in Toronto sees gay bashing spike: "Ryerson's queer student group is scared homophobia is spreading across campus after its door was vandalized and grafitti saying 'gays must be exterminated' was left on a bathroom stall for at least three weeks. 'I have no doubt that we were targeted,' said RyePRIDE member Jesse Trautmann about a series of students' union stickers pasted on the group's door and nearby positive space posters on March 10. The office is located on the second floor of the Student Campus Centre. 'The amount of time it would have taken to cover the entire Rye- PRIDE sign — it was intentional.'"

Group pushes for "gay village" in Ottawa, Canada.

Madonna and Guy Ritchie still together, or just playing for the cameras?

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News: Prince Harry, Eagle Scout, Wolverine, Orlando Bloom

Vigil against violence to be held today in Fort Lauderdale at 4:30pm: "Join the coalition of community leaders and organizations as we gather to remember Simmie Williams and stand up against the rising tide of violence for a memorial service at the murder site at the 1000 block of Sistrunk Boulevard, Fort Lauderdale."

Prince Harry has been fighting undercover in Afghanistan for the past 10 weeks: "The news of his operational posting leaked out following the breakdown of a news blackout agreement with the media when the story was posted on the US-based Drudge Report website. The chief of the general staff, Sir Richard Dannatt, who is head of the British army, expressed disappointment over the leak. 'I am very disappointed that foreign websites have decided to run this story without consulting us,' he said. 'This is in stark contrast to the highly responsible attitude that the whole of the UK print and broadcast media, along with a small number overseas, who have entered into an understanding with us over the coverage of Prince Harry on operations.' Dannatt, who had opposed Harry's deployment to Iraq, went on to praise the prince's performance on deployment."

Orlando Bloom is tired of complaints about his natural manly scent.

NYC sees surge in gay syphilis cases: "After seeing the number of syphilis cases remain stable in 2004 and 2005 then decrease in 2006, the city health department is reporting that syphilis cases increased by 60 percent in 2007 over 2006, with that growth due to new infections among gay and bisexual men."

Bollywood actor rejected: not gay enough to play a fashionista. Kushal Punjabi: "I really got along well with Madhur. He's my kind of director. But I really didn't see myself in that role at all. I'd like to work with directors like Madhur who look at actors as actors and not as stars."

Ben Affleck discusses his revenge sex video with Jimmy Kimmel: "You couldn't really do it half-speed. You had to be painting toes and blow-drying hair. At one point we were going to take a bath together, but the bubbles couldn't get high enough, so that ended up getting scrapped. The little outfits, the short shorts, the hands in the pockets -- it wouldn't have been funny if you didn't really commit to it."

Underwear day takes over Brazilian capital.

Gay Canadian Health Minister Smitherman criticized for proposing to wear adult diaper as test in response to nursing home 'filth' issues: "Opposition politicians, the Canadian Union of Public Employees (CUPE) and a nursing home association said Smitherman's plan to test drive a diaper shows he doesn't understand the issue is about staffing levels – not diaper technology. 'For him to suggest that's his answer is a disgrace,' said Progressive Conservative Leader John Tory. 'It's some kind of a sideshow he seems determined to put on when, in fact, I think people in Ontario would say: 'George Smitherman, do something about it. Let's see the revolution you promised in long-term care.''"

Hugh Jackman: the claws come out.

Fans go wild: New video of the pint-size breakdancing Beckham.

Matthew McConaughey wins mag's honors for mightiest mammaries.

Texas governor Rick Perry holds book-signing for Boy Scout tome: "Perry's tour to promote the book has garnered national attention. The book debuted at No. 1 on The Washington Post's best-seller list for hardcover nonfiction in Washington-area bookshops. His office touted that achievement the day after The New York Times Magazine published an interview in which Perry said scouting was about building character and not about sex. The word 'homosexual,' he said, suggests that gay people are focused on sex."

Eagle Scout leaves organization disgusted by anti-gay policies: "I am ashamed an organization to which I owe so much has chosen to take such a myopic stance on this issue and hides behind a legal veil to exclude gay Scouts."

Wired publishes disturbing new photos from Abu Ghraib (warning: extremely graphic)

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Jimmy Kimmel is F**king Ben Affleck!

While his wife was having her neck ravaged by Gary Busey, Jimmy Kimmel was f**king Ben Affleck.

Here's Kimmel's epic response to Sarah Silverman's previous and much-forwarded video, "I'm f*cking Matt Damon". Kimmel assembled an all-star cast including Brad Pitt, Robin Williams, Cameron Diaz, Josh Groban, Meatloaf, Dominic Monaghan, Harrison Ford, Macy Gray, Christina Applegate, Joan Jett, McLovin, Don Cheadle, Rebecca Romijn, Pete Wentz, Perry Farrell, Good Charlotte, Lance Bass, and Huey Lewis.

Check the clip out AFTER THE JUMP...

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