‘Porno Pete’ LaBarbera Does Not Want Barney Frank Giving Him a Pat-Down at the Airport

Wingnut Peter LaBarbera (aka 'Porno' Pete) of the Americans for Truth About Homosexuality (AFTAH), is concerned about same-sex TSA patdowns:

Labarbera Homeland Security Sec. Janet Napolitano went out of her way yesterday to stress that the TSA pat-downs are "same-gender" — mostly to reassure women that men will not be groping them at airports in the name of safety.

"But what about homosexual TSA agents?" AFTAH President Peter LaBarbera responded. "Isn't it just as inappropriate for a 'gay' male TSA agent to pat down male travelers as it is for a normal, heterosexual male TSA agent to pat down female travelers?

"The reality is, most traveling men would not want Barney Frank to pat them down at the airport security checkpoint," LaBarbera said. "Neither would it be fair to assign Ellen DeGeneres to pat down female travelers. (In the same vein, the Army should no more force normal male soldiers to shower and bunk with homosexual male soldiers than it would force females soldiers to bunk and shower with their male counterparts.)"

Read through for the LOLs.

No doubt Porno Pete has fantasized long and hard about getting an intense wanding at airport security.

Comments

  1. says

    I think I speak for gay men everywhere when I suggest that an enhanced pat-down of this vomitous mass of a human being would be much more traumatic for the gay dude.

    Why “straight” men who are appallingly ugly continue to fear being accosted by gay men for sexual favors is beyond me.

  2. Jonathan says

    He has a point. If given the choice, I would prefer to be frisked by a lesbian TSA agent.

    However, we’re talking about ~800,000,000 passengers a year submitting themselves to time consuming, invasive procedures on top of already increased security precautions that have yet to yield significant safety improvements in almost a decade of implementation.

  3. cupcakes says

    well i have to agree with him, i wouldn’t want barney frank or ellen degeneres touching my jewels either. maybe some hot big butch stud built like a linebacker… sigh!

  4. says

    Why should anyone care about the sex, gender, or sexuality of a TSA official? The TSA employees should be operating in a professional capacity, not a sexual one, so there’s no reason to start dividing things in the first place. Out of courtesy the TSA could offer a choice to change who is giving you a pat-down, but enforcing same-sex pat-downs is just another instance of systemic binaries.

    Of course, from a numbers standpoint, there are more straight predatory people than queer ones (b/c straights are more numerous than queers), so it makes sense as a minimization technique. As long as no one is saying it’s a perfect solution, it seems like a reasonable policy.

    And LaBarbera is clearly not trying to solve anything, just cause more problems.

  5. Zach says

    “mostly to reassure women that men will not be groping them at airports in the name of safety.”

    Entirely to reassure women that men won’t grope them. Personally, I think if a woman has a particular concern, then she may opt for another woman to do the pat-down. I don’t think an actual policy measure is necessary or even advisable.

    And where would Porno Pete’s suggestion leave bisexuals? Would one homosexual encounter be sufficient to disqualify a man from patting down another man? Would that become part of the hiring process?

  6. says

    What about the crafty nefarious gay traveler who manipulates the poor straight hunky TSA worker man into fondling his homosexual junk? Porno Pete should spend some time thinking about THAT threat to national security…

  7. Timtohyjames24 says

    The strange thing is when you look though the Christian news service website they have all the far right usual suspects getting there news feed everyday. But there are a few odd ball mainstream places like ESPN, Fox Home Entertainment, Discovery Channel, and TLC getting this far right wacko crap everyday.

  8. says

    If we extend Porno Pete’s logic to its “logical” conclusion, LGBT people should be banned from all public transportation and from working in any security/medical/sports/apparel related fields because 1). some security officer might have to pat down someone of the same sex who might be homosexual and 2). homosexuals should never-ever be allowed to see or touch the sexual organs of another person for any reason whatsoever.

  9. TANK says

    drip drip drip, the thoughts of fundie christotards homophobes never wander above the genital region. Peeeepeeeeeee vagina! Though, clearly thoughts are less about vagina in stinky pete’s case….he’s far less consumed by female sexuality. Disgusting people.

  10. mike says

    I’ve tried but I just don’t get Porno Pete’s, um, “logic”.

    Hey, Petey! There already are gay or lesbian TSA screeners who are also consummate professionals and take their jobs seriously.

    I can assure you, Petey, that they are more interested in protecting passengers than they are trying to sneak a quick dick-pat off you.

    But, Petey, considering that you are a homophobe douchebag, I can tell you that it is ridiculous to assume that any gay man in his right mind would want to “cop a feel” from your ugly dweeb ass. You delude yourself, Petey-Tweety.

    Petey, you’re ugly. Not just ugly. BUTT UGLY. You are so ugly that if I look up the word “ugly” in the dictionary, I see your picture.

    And, don’t worry, Petey. I’m sure Barney Frank would NOT want to put his hands on your skanky, sleazy, Pillsbury dough-boy body.

    Besides, Petey, I would imagine your dick is even smaller than your brain and not worth the bother.

  11. says

    I swear to God, I’ve sat here for the last ten minutes laughing like a crazy person over the majority of these responses. You guys are too too funny. Especially this one: “Besides, Petey, I would imagine your dick is even smaller than your brain and not worth the bother.”

    You think? LOL!

  12. Jason Young says

    Or better yet we could just end these dumbass scans/sexual assaults that don’t actually make anyone safer and fire the whole lot of the TSA. Then we wouldn’t have to worry about any former TSA agents accosting anyone in an airport with regularity.

  13. yaaah69 says

    Believe me his mother had to tie a T-Bone around his neck just to get the dog to play with him. No self respecting homo would want to lift his sack , if he has one. He is just trying to make a name for him self as he is an uugggly child and has been ib the closet too long…Now that all the hate is coming out of the woodwork. I think we are are going to have to fight harder for what is ours. DADT repeal is on the road to oblivion. We are going to have to get rough to get what we should already have. Freedom !!

  14. wimsy says

    We’re never going to get anywhere waiting for President Fierce or Congress to give us equality. The courts are the answer. But those who abandon the Obama for being gutless should remember who appoints Supreme Court justices.

  15. janssen says

    I’d far rather see an uncomfortable groping of each and every airline passenger (including myself) than a single terrorist incident.

    Peter: Very few straight men worry about the things that you worry about.

    I wonder if Peter LaBarbera were erotically, sensually groped by a homosexual male TSA screener if he might finally have a “Three Faces of Eve” breakthrough moment and stop being so freakin crazy.

  16. jack ryan says

    “wingnut” Peter has a good point.

    Quoted from the idiot commenter named Mike: “Hey, Petey! There already are gay or lesbian TSA screeners who are also consummate professionals and take their jobs seriously.”

    The same could be said to the women about hetro men, right? So why the need to have same sex screening policy in the first place?

    Send me your mailing address. I’ll mail you a dollar so you can buy some commonsense.

    Quoted from the idiot poster “the milkman (LOL! WHAT A NAME! LOL!)”:

    “I think I speak for gay men everywhere when I suggest that an enhanced pat-down of this vomitous mass of a human being would be much more traumatic for the gay dude.

    Why “straight” men who are appallingly ugly continue to fear being accosted by gay men for sexual favors is beyond me. ”

    Yea whatever. You Crusers would do just about anything with a working mouth….

  17. TANK says

    *jack types while adjusting his manzier after furiously masturbating to gay pornography.*

    Jack’s just frustrated because most people frown on pedophilia, and he can’t see his genitals while standing to–as his peepaw would say–“warsh ’em down on sundays”.

    No, jack, pedophilia will never be okay…no matter how many eyeless photos of mario lopez you send to the thirteen year old boy down the street. Never, ever, ever…

Leave A Reply