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Anti-Cannibalism Bill In OK

Picture 26Weird but true: The Oklahoma legislature is considering a bill to outlaw cannibalism. Not because cannibalism has been a problem in OK. It hasn't. Check out the text of Sen. Ralph Shortey's Senate Bill 1418:

An Act relating to food; prohibiting the manufacture or sale of food or products which use aborted human fetuses; providing for codification; and providing an effective date.

BE IT ENACTED BY THE PEOPLE OF THE STATE OF OKLAHOMA:
SECTION 1. NEW LAW A new section of law to be codified in the Oklahoma Statutes as Section 1-1150 of Title 63, unless there is created a duplication in numbering, reads as follows:
No person or entity shall manufacture or knowingly sell food or any other product intended for human consumption which contains aborted human fetuses in the ingredients or which used aborted human fetuses in the research or development of any of the ingredients.
SECTION 2. This act shall become effective November 1, 2012

Reading that, my first thought was: Medicine! For there couldn't possibly be any foods in OK supermarkets that contain aborted human fetuses, or that were created by R&D requiring the study thereof. Which must mean Sen. Shortey's real concern must be for the "manufacture" and "known selling" of "other products intended for human consumption." And that must mean medicine derived from embryonic stem cell research. Sen. Shortey, I thought, wants to preemptively deny his state the next decade's most advaned medical care.

But then I visited KOKHFox.com and saw their report on the legislation, and discovered that Sen. Shortey really is worried about fetuses in his food. (And, it seems, medicine. But mostly he's grossed out about the food thing.) Watch KOKHFox's report here.

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Comments

  1. Phew! Looks like human fetus products intended for animal or machine consumption are still safe. Not sure about corporations, though. If corporations are people can you still make fetus products for them to consume? I dunno. Sounds like a possible jobs killer to me.

    Posted by: JJ | Jan 22, 2012 6:57:43 PM


  2. I'm unclear whether the real problem here is the CRAY-zee, or the Stoopid. I'm sure of one thing though, Morans are involved.

    Posted by: SoLeftImRight | Jan 22, 2012 7:25:37 PM


  3. I don't know, fried fetus has a nice ring to it .

    Posted by: aki | Jan 22, 2012 7:56:42 PM


  4. No one eats fetuses. It's common knowledge that children are best served at one year old.

    http://www.gutenberg.org/files/1080/1080-h/1080-h.htm

    Posted by: JJ | Jan 22, 2012 8:32:29 PM


  5. Maybe they'll compromise and just outlaw using food stamps for the purchase of fetus cuisine. That way government won't be subsidizing cannibalism but you can spend your own Federal Reserve Notes on fetal-cini Alfredo with (zy)gote cheese. Or perhaps some Chinese at Human Dynasty.

    Remember, Tuesday is Soylent Green day.

    Posted by: Anastasia Beaverhausen | Jan 22, 2012 9:09:54 PM


  6. What a shame. Fetus is delicious on a cracker...

    Posted by: Carl | Jan 22, 2012 11:04:30 PM


  7. considering how many antibiotics we dump into livestock to fatten them up, hormones to fortify bigger bones and pesticidess to fertilize the grasses thet eat, I don't find the bill that far stretched

    Posted by: doug | Jan 22, 2012 11:20:27 PM


  8. United States Patent 8067539
    T1R Taste Receptors and Genes Encoding Same

    Basically they want to feed tasty things to human cells to see how taste works. Somehow that got interpreted as "human cells are tasty things." It's the Hansel & Gretel theory of taste perception.

    Posted by: Karl | Jan 23, 2012 12:15:09 AM


  9. But. My facial creams.

    Posted by: O HERRO | Jan 23, 2012 7:32:58 AM


  10. Actually, it's been reported that forced animal cannibalism in the UK contributed to the 1990's mad cow scare. I think that practice has been banned in the US for a long time though. This bill seems on par with bills making April 29th, 'Give your teacher an apple day' or something, crowd pleasing nonsense.

    Posted by: anon | Jan 23, 2012 9:01:12 AM


  11. Hmmm, is this a move by the Evangelicals against the Catholic Church? Ya know, that whole body and blood of Christ thing

    Posted by: Al | Jan 23, 2012 9:57:31 AM


  12. Oklahoma, you have a LOT of time on your hands. Put that time towards some marriage equality legislation, please.

    Posted by: Steverino | Jan 23, 2012 1:55:45 PM


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