Comments

  1. Keisha Kornbread says

    Is Damian identifying as a male or legally a male? I think Damian should wear the robe designated for the proper legal sex. If Damian is not legally a male, then I don’t see anything wrong with the Catholic School’s request.

  2. Mike Ryan says

    I’m with Damien on this one. Why on earth would any parent send their child to a Catholic school in the first place? As long as the Catholic religion discriminates against any American citizen their tax exempt status should be revoked. Yes, let them have their prejudiced beliefs but the American taxpayer should not be forced to pay for it.

  3. robertL says

    Come on come on – nothing in the Bible address clothes or color. We as a society have got to get a handle on this or we will devour ourselves. Let the poor kid pick whatever he wants. There are bigger things to address in this world like on going Old Testament tornados, hurricanes, and famine.

  4. excy says

    Religion….ughhhh. In a loving world this kid should be able to pick up his diploma and stand proud. He is lucky that he has the support of his father.
    The Superintendent of Saint Pius school is just being mean. Ridiculous….and totally unnecessary.

  5. Christopher says

    I feel for this student, but it is a Catholic school. It isn’t like the family didn’t know what they were getting into. We cannot have it both ways – we don’t want to be told how to live or to have our lives unfairly judged, so we cannot judge either. Yes it is unfair, but this isn’t a public school – it is a Catholic high school.

  6. Mike8787 says

    Anyone saying he shouldn’t go to the school misses the point. The school is offering services to the public and therein should not be allowed to discriminate based on gender identity. The New Mexico Human Rights Act, which covers public accommodations, includes protections for gender identity (and sexual orientation). This is illegal under New Mexico law, and the school knows or should know it.

    Furthermore, for those saying you get what you sign up for, that is not a fair assessment. It is very possible that this Catholic School provides a substantially better academic experience for students than the surrounding public schools. The parents might have sent Damian there because of the quality of education, not because they are Catholic. Should a student be forced to get a sub-par education simply because he identifies as transgender? No.

  7. Keisha Kornbread says

    Merv,

    I read the article. And my question still is not answered. Is Damian LEGALLY a male or female. If Damian is LEGALLY a male, then Damian should be allowed to wear a robe designated for males. DUH. Identifying as one thing does not make you exempt from the rules of an organization.

  8. says

    Is this the level to which teachers and school principals have sunk ?

    Does there now have to be an Inquisition into a young boy’s sexuality just because he wants to wear the clothes he feels most secure wearing ?
    Teachers should be addressing more fundamental issues such as whether any pupil is bullied or ridiculed in any way because of his identity.
    The very idea of a school Principal making an issue of this is pathetic and says much more about the hang-ups of the teachers….
    So we now have educators (so called) stepping down into the pit of personal humiliation and belittling of sexual identity of kids who have been entrusted to their charge.
    Has the teaching profession sunk so low that it now bullies the most vulnerable kids instead of being out there supporting them and encouraging them in their struggle with what must be an emotional wrenching time in their lives.
    Has this school sunk so low that it has to take refuge behind the legal cloak of what the birth cert says ?
    From what I read above this school has lost its way.
    Shame on St.Pius School, shame ,shame,shame.

  9. woody says

    He should wear the black rode and walk in the graduation. If they want to call security, let them. At least he’ll have his pride and remember that he didn’t diminish himself by giving in.
    Just go, Damian.

  10. Lymis says

    robertL – while I completely agree with your conclusion and support Damien in his choice to dress like the other male graduates, it’s not true that the Bible doesn’t address clothes. It’s just one verse in Deuteronomy, but it’s in there.

    And, since Damien is transgender, putting him in a “girl’s” robe is forcing him to violate the Scripture verse, not enforcing it.

    It’s a bit rich coming from a Catholic, though, given that their clergy and hierarchy don’t exactly dress by the normal standards of gendered clothing today. And since the “robes” are identical except for color, it’s a bit of a stretch to put some moral imperative on it. This is anti-trans harassment, pure and simple.

  11. David Hearne says

    Why on earth would any parent send their child to a Catholic school in the first place?
    Posted by: Mike Ryan

    Because many or most public schools are dangerous and don’t deliver a good education. The kids in my family went to Catholic school (we aren’t Catholic) or Quaker school (we haven’t been Quaker in 300 years) because the DC public schools which were safe and excellent when my mother was a youth have been handed over to an ethnic base who won’t learn and won’t shut up so that other people can learn.

  12. David Hearne says

    Sorry, but somebody needs to sit down these “transgenders” and read them the truth.

    No one cares what you think you are.
    We’ll all play along to varying degrees, perhaps simply to get you to shut up.
    You can’t force us to believe that you are a sex that you are not.
    If you are all hung up on clothes and hair and how you present, then maybe this really isn’t all that important.

  13. Steve says

    In cases of political corruption, etc., investigators are often told to “follow the money.” This is not that different. Follow the satisfaction. If this petty superintendent was not deriving satisfaction from oppressing this poor boy- and delivering satisfaction to some others, people he no doubt wishes to please- it wouldn’t be happening. The root of this is meanness, pure and simple, and part and parcel of the Roman Catholic Church’s determination that it will grind people down who don’t conform. But Damien will move on with his life- hurt, but not broken- and leave this hate-based, useless institution behind.

  14. Mike says

    Hump. He should be allowed to wear any robe he wants! Something tells me that the idiot superintendent wears a white robe – with a pointed hood and scissor cut eyes.

  15. Pete N SFO says

    “The Saint Pius Superintendent tells KRQE News 13, St Pius goes by what the student’s birth certificate says if there’s any question on what gender-color they wear at graduation.”

    I love it! This clown would have people believe there’s a time when they’ve consulted birth certificates before… Mary, puleeeze!

    Let the kids wear whatever they want, regardless of gender & problem is solved. So, that’s what’s really happening. The school thinks gender is about only genitals & not the brain & that they should be able to tell someone else what to think, feel, etc.

    Congrats, Damian! You’ll soon see that the best thing about High School is that it is now, OVER!

  16. ratbastard says

    @David Hearne,

    And to clarify, what you posted is especially true in urban areas. Catholic schools are a Godsend for parents [ALL kinds of parents, of all ‘races’, ethnicities, even religions] because they on average offer superior a education vs the average urban public school, are FAR safer for the students, and are generally much less expensive vs other private schools such as traditional prep schools. I grew up in NYC and Boston. The poor and most so-called working class sent their kids to dangerous and poorly preforming public schools [even though they were well funded, better funded than comparable Catholic schools]. So-called middle class people, if they could, sent their kids to a Catholic school [at least at the HS level] or attempted to get their kids into one of the few decent public schools that required an exam to get in [i.e. Boston Latin, etc.]. The truly privileged sent their kids to expensive private schools and prep schools, or to one of the very few good public schools which do exist in the better inner suburbs, such as Brookline in Boston, or Cambridge Rindge and Latin, which technically isn’t in Boston but might as well be. If I had attended Boston public schools at the HS level, my assigned [by court ordered desegregation] would have been a state of the art HS located in a dangerous majority black neighborhood, which had notoriously poor educational standards and serious security issues. This even though TONS of $ was dumped into it, to make it a premier school. Decades and God knows how much $ later, it still s*cks and is still a dangerous school to attend. Students routinely brawl, stabbings even shooting are commonplace.

  17. William says

    “…, it’s not true that the Bible doesn’t address clothes. It’s just one verse in Deuteronomy, but it’s in there…”

    Uh…think you forgot to do something, pal;

    Like provide a citation.

    Kinda Importnt when you are citing The Book Of Crap as you are.

    Scholars do that.

    Trolls just ignore it and expect people to believe them. Which is why most Cath-olics are trolls.

  18. William says

    “…, it’s not true that the Bible doesn’t address clothes. It’s just one verse in Deuteronomy, but it’s in there…”

    Uh…think you forgot to do something, pal;

    Like provide a citation.

    Kinda Importnt when you are citing The Book Of Crap as you are.

    Scholars do that.

    Trolls just ignore it and expect people to believe them. Which is why most Cath-olics are trolls.

  19. says

    This young man has more courage and integrity and strength than nearly every grown-adult man I know in life.

    Thats why stories about people like this young’un inspire such hatred from this site’s resident cowards, and form bigots in general: the last thing they want to see is a “fringe outsider weirdo” with more spine and self-assurance than they’ll ever have.

    I stand in support with Damian. As any human being with a shred of integrity will do.

    Those that don’t – of course you don’t. Your own family and community hates having to be related to your gay @ss, so of course you’re gonna hate on a story where a young transgendered boy is supported by his own parents. He’s loved and embraced, you’re not, and so you come on here to express how jealous you are. Textbook.

    ROCK. ON. DAMIAN.

    Incidentally, as this is the International Day Against Homophobia & Transphobia, this is a heartwarming story to read. Our trans brothers and sisters need support and love, and to read this story of these parents LOVING who their child is….well…that’s just bloody beautiful.

    Terrific mom and dad, there.

  20. james says

    @Not that Rob. That’s my question. Why have different color robes at all? My high school didn’t do that, nor my college, nor my grad school.

  21. David Hearne says

    Not That Rob – The most sensible post of the day. Thinking back, my high school had one color robe for everyone. The fact that it was Kelly green is no credit, but we all wore the same robe.

  22. Michael says

    Another sterling image for the Catholic Church, particularly the administration. When will Catholics understand that they are the Church? Not the bigots that run the institution. Stop with the money. See how long they hold out. Stop with any intimacy with your partner, if they insist on funding the organization. See how long they hold out.

  23. johnny says

    Don’t the male priests wear white robes on occasion? I don’t get the color significance, they’re all the same model robes. This is just petty and stupid and trying to make an example out of one person for nothing more than bigotry and hatred.

    F*cking catholic officials have their heads firmly planted up their arses.

  24. David Hearne says

    for William :

    deut 22;5

    The woman shall not wear that which pertains unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman’s garment: for all that do so are an abomination unto the LORD your God.

  25. RMc says

    Did Damian’s father pay the school? Did they accept his money? If yes, then they WILL do what Damian and his father wants. Period, or give them their money back.

    To Damian, my advise is this: Tell that ingrate school “Either you let me wear the black robe or I spray paint the white robe in rainbow colors. Your choice.”

  26. robertL says

    If the religious superior thought out the solution certainly lake stated above he would have all wear the same color. I prefer he have all student wear Pharisee robes. For fun lets throw in Sadducee and we can have a party.

  27. Rick says

    Little Missy, you are no man and you never will be, nor will any of us who are men acknowledge you as such.

    Wear a tie, cut your hair short, get a fake d!ck attached to yourself, smoke cigars, watch football games…..it will not matter.

    You are not one of us and we will not accept you as one of us.

    End of discussion.

  28. Dastius Krazitauc says

    “Don’t the male priests wear white robes on occasion?”

    Do a search for Pope and Prada and see what you get. I posted a link to a photo of Benedict wearing red prada shoes and white lace but Towleroad rejected it.

    Is there a ban on posting links here?

  29. says

    bandanajack – they exist only in the anonymity of the online world. not one of these trolls has the orbs to actually function around other gay people in society.

    i love and accept my brothers and sisters of the trans community.

    which gay men don’t accept them? closet-cases like RICK who couldn’t get f***ed even if they fell bottom-first onto a cock factory.

  30. robertL says

    Catholic Church needs to be concerned with bikini’s on the beach rather than gowns at graduation.
    Maybe Papa Frankie will rule on this one.

  31. MateoM says

    Funny. The only person siding with David Hearne is Ratbastard and Rick. Everyone on Towleroad who pays attention knows that that Ratbastard and David Hearne are aliases of Rick. So David Hearne is literally coming to his own defense. Because, as a troll, his opinions are awful and no compassionate, intelligent person would be so hostile to a transgendered youth.

    What a miserable troll.

  32. Derrick from Philly says

    LOL @ “…closet-cases like RICK who couldn’t get f***ed even if they fell bottom-first onto a cock factory.”

    Get those bitches, Kiwi. LOL

  33. Acronym Jim says

    Hearne/Rick,

    I hope you’re using the royal “we” because you certainly don’t speak for all of us with your misogynistic vitriol.

    And, Hearne, what’s tiresome is the proven fact that you have to use fake sock puppets to shore up your opinions.

    Damian, keep fighting the good fight and don’t let the rat bastards get you down.

  34. Mick says

    The Superintendant’s actions are petty and mean. Why would they even have a policy that dictates what color robe kids wear? It shouldn’t even be an issue.

  35. David says

    If you had asked me a few years ago, I would have supported this student. But the more I have read about trans activists and what they think of gay people, the more I realize that these people are not our friends or allies. They are extremely homophobic and see us as something to exploit for their own benefit. We are only useful to them for our money and for our organizations, which they want to control and use to push “trans rights” and not gay rights.

    Read the trans blogs. It will really open your eyes.

  36. William says

    This is too much. Why is it necessary to distinguish gender by robe color? The easy solution to this, that won’t require either side to give in on what gender they believe Damian is… pick one color and have all the graduates wear it.

    I’ll even make it easier for them by putting my Catholic hat on and picking a color for them. The norm, for everyone (even lay people) performing any kind of ministerial function in liturgies, is to wear an alb, the liturgical vestment sign of a person who was baptized. The alb is white.

    Solution: Since this is a Catholic school the graduates are graduating from, mirror the graduation gown after the alb and make it white. Then they achieve two things. 1) The graduates highlight their dual status of baptized and graduate; and 2) they don’t have to have a debate over what gender anyone is.

  37. HA! says

    Wow— so this constitutes news. REALLY!?!
    I can identify as cat…don’t make it so.
    If this young woman wants to have a sex change…cool. But until then, You is a girl.

  38. HA! says

    a bound chest and short hair do not a male make.

    Reminds me of the women a few years back at an all girls college that started taking hormone therapy and indentified as male. School asked them to finish elsewhere. They were pissed. OH WELL.

  39. Derrick from Philly says

    You’re right, MateoM. I’ve never heard of this Michael before. Has he ever posted on Towleroad before? If so, he hasn’t developed much of a voice.

    “Kiwi=MatteoM=DerrickFromPhilly

    They are all the same loser.”

    Is the above the best you can come up with, Michael? It’s not good for Gay people to be dull and boring, Michael.
    If you live in a major city maybe there’s some Gay finishing school you could attend.

  40. William says

    Just a side note. I’ve noticed there are two different people posting in the comment section as “William”. I’ve noticed that for awhile, in other posts.

    I really don’t care. If two different people are named William, that’s fine. Two different people can use that name. But I don’t want the other William’s thoughts being confused for mine.

  41. ratbastard says

    NO, MateoM,

    I am ONLY ‘ratbastard’. Although there’s zero question 95% of ‘conservative’ troll posts on here which immediately result in a huge number of predictable counter posts are by a small handful of far left ‘progressives’ such as the guy from Toronto by way of Thunder Bay. This troll is the mother of all trolls. I’m sure I’ve responded numerous times to one of his alias trolls, maybe even on this thread.

  42. MateoM says

    Actually, Rat, any gay person with a brain and a heart is a “far left progressive.” Far more people on here side with us than with you, and that’s only because the only people that agree with you is Rick and his other aliases. Because of course you are Rick. We’ve known this for some time. Derrick is in Philly, Kiwi is in NY, and I’m in California. I assume you’re in your mother’s basement.

    Funny, you’re obsession with kiwi sounds like UFFDA’s. So if you’re not Kiwi, you’re at least UFFDA.

  43. says

    any transpeople reading this, take solace: the anti-trans crap you’ve been reading online will not affect you in the real world.

    why? these cowards don’t have the balls to not only say it to your faces, they’re not “man enough” to live in the real world, as openly gay people.

    trust – spewing hatred online is all they have to live for. so don’t get too upset – in the real world, there are people who will love and embrace you.

    anti-trans gay men? such wimps, they can only make their statements online, anonymously.

    so shine on, you diamonds.

  44. William says

    Kiwi, if the comments here don’t matter,why do you spend all your time trying to rebut them?

    Also, those shining diamonds you talk about have a suicide/suicide attempt rate of 66%. Your hollow words don’t help them at all. Shame on you.

  45. says

    I spent the afternoon with some brilliant Queer youth, our straight allies, and LGBT people at Toronto’s flag-raising for the International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia.

    our living out loud truth will decimate your cowardly lies.

    Yes, there are high suicide rates. And suicide attempt rates. And high rates of physical-violence against them.

    That’s why I, and my family, and countless others will always stand in strong solidarity with them. Visible, Vocal, in the flesh.

    Feel free to provide a link showing what you’re doing to help anyone. 😀

  46. William says

    “That’s why I, and my family, and countless others will always stand in strong solidarity with them.”

    You mean your daddy, the CEO? Why don’t you tell us more about him and what it is like to be the 1 percent?

  47. Marc says

    Why are people mean? This is simply a case of “Hi, I’m going to be a jerk just to hurt your feelings.” Damian clearly identifies as male, so get over it, school. How would you feel if someone told you you weren’t who you know yourself to be. This is just cruel, and it makes me upset to think people in power think it’s okay to act this way. On the flipside, they are being exposed for their bigotry, so at least more of us are aware of this situation so we can fight back and bring this issue out into the open. Transgender is the new gay.
    :-)

  48. Dechen says

    This is just sickening. I will NEVER donate another thing to St. Pius EVER. I encourage other people who support Damian to do likewise. Is it any wonder that the catholic church has lost so many members?
    I encourage the catholic church to join the 21st century and get out of the dark ages.

  49. Huffletough says

    To be clear Pius is a Catholic PRIVATE school that caters to not only Catholics but other students as well. The valedictorian of my graduating class was an actively practicing HINDU. The reason parents enroll their children into this school is because it is also a college prep school with a 97% graduation rate with all graduates attending a four year university. You get a great education and work your ass off to get it. College was a breeze after I graduated and made it much easier for me. I don’t know much about the situation other than what the articles say (I graduated 6 years ago) but if Damian is not Catholic and identifies as a male than the Pius officials should mind their own business. This is bullying in the worst sense because it’s by one of authority. The superintendent is dehumanizing a young man and guess what? The press is noticing. Enrollment is already down for the school and each graduating class has the same joke about half of their class dropping out before graduation. My class had 400+ freshman and 200+ making it to graduation, with maybe half of that number denouncing the Catholic religion in between then. Just something to think about.
    Before I graduated everyone wore black. I’m pretty sure the prissy girls in my class were responsible for the whole “girls wear white gowns” issue. And to be honest, the white gowns are terribly see through and made of cheaper and rougher material than the black robes. I still have mind and ripped it off the moment they released us. Overall it was a bad decision and they should just make everyone wear the same colors.

  50. ratbastard says

    Damian should hold his own graduation and flip the bird at his high school’s graduation. Who needs that noise, make your own celebration!

  51. Rick says

    Damian you are welcome in my home. Anytime. Any place. I applaud your bravery. All the haters? Meh, ignore them. Be strong and keep moving forward,

  52. says

    I’m an alumni of this school, and would be ashamed by this story if it surprised me at all. Many of the teachers are great, but the cowardly administration is horrible. In case anyone is interested, there are some ways to protest. Sign the petition at: http://petitions.moveon.org/sign/let-damian-walk-for-graduati.fb28?source=s.fb&r_by=7867243

    email: ysutton@archdiosf.org or
    mmares@spx.k12.nm.us

    Thanks everyone. I don’t think they will change, but they need to know that this isn’t ok.

  53. andrew says

    Parents who send their children to a Catholic School to be indoctrinated with ancient primitive dogmas get just what they deserve. Don’t complain when those primitive myths bit you in the A$$.

  54. terry says

    Catholic clergy routinely dress in women’s garb so forcing this boy to cross dress isn’t a stretch for them. This is such a trivial issue to the rest of us but if walking in a black gown will make someone’s day brighter shouldn’t a religion embrace that sentiment? Or are they afraid he will cause others to want to be who they are as well. You can’t have free thought in the catholic church and that’s the issue.
    Come on Damian, didn’t you know they were bigots before this?

  55. says

    It is very sad the school will not relent on this policy. He has obviously been able to attend school as a male. A ridiculous piece of paper, ie birth certificate, merely says a person’s physical gender. For those of us who are transgender we know that gender is a mental, spiritual and emotional state. Our hearts and souls are who we really are.

    I feel sad for Damian and his family. The Catholic School is so missing the point. I believe Jesus was all about love and tolerance. Somewhere along the line that message seems to have been skewed. Damian, I applaud your courage and conviction to be the person you truly are, Bravo!

  56. sherry says

    If you go to a private school, then you accept their rules as long as they are NOT
    receiving tax payer’s money.

    Why in the hell does the Catholic school using color to distinguish gender? We have
    fought gender bias for not only decades but
    CENTURIES. And yet this religion tries
    at every turn to make a distinction. This
    Catholic school does a disservice to ALL
    people.

    I got news for you. One can believe
    in God without manmade religion and its
    disasterous affects. Loving God without
    its manmade interpretations.

  57. says

    The school has a point. But I guess the graduation is all about the students, right? So I guess it is better to allow such student to wear the outfit he/she is comfortable with. After all it is his/her graduation and it is his/her reward after all the years of hard work.

  58. Ninong says

    @Keisha Kornbread: The video is part of the article. If you watch the video you will see that it’s clear that Damian is still female. For one thing, he may be only 17 years old, or barely 18 at most. That’s why they used the term “identifies as” in the article. So, yes, he’s “legally female” is that’s what you’re confused about.

    You would think that for $10,000/yr tuition the school would let him wear whichever color graduation robe he wants. On the other hand, religious schools are exempt from a lot of rules when it comes to anything they consider part of their religious teaching.

    If I were him, I think I would show up in a suit and tie and see if they kicked me out or not. Either way, he’ll still get his diploma, they’re not about to without that from him, especially after charging his parents $40,000 over the past four years!

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