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Hearst vs Holmes

Andy Towle June 20, 2005

HearstholmesI’m loving the comparison of the kidnapping of Patricia Hearst and the “taking” of Katie Holmes over at Pop Culture Junkies.

Citing the (real life) transcript from one of my favorite films of last year, Guerilla: The Taking of Patty Hearst, Rob Thurman imagines a series of phone calls from Katie to her parents over the same time frame as the Hearst kidnapping.

DAY 9
Patty has been abducted – Katie is being Oprahed

Patty: Mom, Dad. I’m OK. I’m with a combat unit that’s armed with automatic weapons. And these people aren’t just a bunch of nuts. They’ve been really honest with me but they’re perfectly willing to die for what they’re doing.

Katie: Mom. Dad. I’m OK. I’m with Tom and his security team is armed with automatic weapons. And these Scientologists aren’t just a bunch of nuts. No, they’re evolved clams. They’ve been really honest with me but they’re perfectly willing to let Brooke Shields die for what they’re doing.

Hysterical, if not somewhat scarily on point.

Rescue Mission: Impossible [pop culture junkies]

Meanwhile, Scarlet Johansson was reportedly Cruise’s first target.

Topics: Uncategorized More Posts About: Personalities

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