01/09/2006
Kids These Days
::SPOILER WARNING::
As Bree van de Kamp's relationship with her son Andrew on Desperate Housewives gets more, well, desperate, the gay sex has kicked it up a notch. Last night's episode featured a big wet sidewalk kiss which Shawn Pyfrom attacked with gusto. Bree's reaction was characteristically uptight:
BREE: I saw what you did with your friend.ANDREW: Oh. And you didn't turn into a pillar of salt. Good for you.
BREE: This is not a joke, Andrew. What if the neighbors had seen you?
ANDREW: Well I'd hope they'd think that I landed a hottie.
BREE: I may not be able to control what you do outside of this home but while you are under this roof you will not mock my values. If you so much as smile at that boy, so help me I will ship you off to Camp Hennessey and I will not pick you up again till you are 18. Do I make myself clear?
So is Bree homophobic? Or do her "values" simply concern underage sex (values that an innocent kiss shouldn't violate)? Clearly, she's got some discomfort with her gay son because I doubt she'd be reacting the same way if Andrew's "friend" was a girl. At the same time, Andrew pretty much throws it all back in her face, as we see in the next scene (see screencap below).
Anyway, as I'd just about had enough of DH, I'm glad this storyline is back. It tends to shine a light on the complex (and often uncomfortable) relationships between mothers and their gay sons, even if executed in the wildly unrealistic relief of a soap opera. We've all experienced that awkward moment when mom tries to serve you fresh OJ and croissants in bed, and instead catches you naked with your lab partner, right?
Posted 5:20 PM EST by Andy in Film & TV | Permalink
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DH WAS getting a little 'samey', storylines going round in circles, so it's good to hear about this storyline making a comeback, just as the UK is about to start in on Season 2 next week.
Posted by: Darren | Jan 9, 2006 5:26:29 PM
I wanna see your lab partner!
Posted by: Mitch | Jan 9, 2006 5:34:11 PM
As much as I like seeing M2M romance on the small screen, the inexplicable part, given Mary Cherry's own open sexuality, is that Andrew, however cute and getting cuter, is one of the bad guys of the series. His reaction to his CLEARLY homophobic mother is one thing, but have we forgotten that he killed a woman by hit and run and took it no more seriously than if he'd forgotten to throw his sticky sheets in the laundry? Until a larger number and wider variety [Saintly—Just Human—Boring—Shady—etc.] of gay characters are on screen, I'd prefer to see none to the only one [not counting his boyfriend with minimal screen time] in a series with such a relatively large regular cast be an immoral jerk. Come on, Cherry. Isn't it about time a mature gay couple moved to Wisteria Lane?
Posted by: Leland | Jan 9, 2006 5:51:39 PM
True, bad egg Andrew is hardly a sympathetic character.
Posted by: andy | Jan 9, 2006 5:53:41 PM
Oh, is there anyone who is really sympathetic on DH? The homophobic mother who watched while someone committed suicide? The sexual predator wife who cheated with the underage gardener? The career woman who brought a rat into her house to get her husband to clean up? Only Teri Hatcher's character hasn't done something morally atrocious (lately) and she's so dim witted and self centered I can only sympathize with her daughter for having to put up with mom's bratittude.
Posted by: chrisafer | Jan 9, 2006 6:16:27 PM
they couldnt have done it any better.
Posted by: Michael | Jan 9, 2006 6:21:59 PM
I think Bree would be reacting more or less the same way even if Andrew's friend were a girl, remembering how anxious she got after she found a condom in Andrew's room (at this point, she hadn't found out that her son was gay yet) in season one. However, I do believe the fact that Andrew's "friend" is a boy gets her more upset.
I've been waiting this story of Andrew with Justin to show up in the series more, and I must say it was worth waiting for. They both are really hot, but I like Justin (Ryan Carnes) better.
Posted by: kevin | Jan 9, 2006 6:22:10 PM
Having Mom walk in on you and your lab partner? I can top that: How about walking in on Mom and your lab partner? I'm still in therapy over that one...
Posted by: zinc alloy | Jan 9, 2006 6:59:32 PM
Andrew had some pretty entertaining lines this episode.
Posted by: Chad Hanging | Jan 9, 2006 7:02:36 PM
Ironic that the shows creator Marc Cherry is a cock fag and he chooses to portray homosexuality in such a deviant, unflattering way. Making Bree's son a passive agressive, spiteful man-pussy makes me glad I was respectful enough to my parents to wait and come out until once I was in college--so I could tell them to go fuck themselves if they didn't approve.
I hate everything about this show, except Jesse Metcalfe...wait he's gone...that's right, I hate all of it.
The best gay role model on televison is...wait, there isn't one.
Posted by: Joe | Jan 9, 2006 8:33:51 PM
"I can top that: How about walking in on Mom and your lab partner? I'm still in therapy over that one..."
Hope you joined in and made it a threesome?
Posted by: HisHolynessDPope | Jan 9, 2006 9:31:55 PM
I love that the gay character is just as nasty and just as scheming as the rest of the characters on "Deperate Housewives!! Aren't their enough boring "nice guy" gay characters around??
It reminds me of when Christopher Reeve expressed such delight that he was able to play a homicidal maniac in a wheelchair on "The Practice." He was so tired of boring, near saintly representations of people in wheelchairs.
Posted by: cafegogo | Jan 9, 2006 10:17:57 PM
We all know that the character of Bree is a very conservative Republican, we also know that's she's deeply religious and traditional, so why are people surprised that her character is homophobic? And as far as all of you whining little girls out there who are upset that the gay character isn't more of a "positive role model", thank God you people aren't the writers of this show... how boring. I saw the movie The Family Stone last night-- an okay movie, but of course the gay son had to be the perfect, sweet, hearing-impaired sympathetic character with the perfect loving partner and no relationship problems. I commend Marc Cherry for not taking this easy way out.
Posted by: Robert | Jan 9, 2006 11:23:34 PM
We all know that the character of Bree is a very conservative Republican, we also know that's she's deeply religious and traditional, so why are people surprised that her character is homophobic? And as far as all of you whining little girls out there who are upset that the gay character isn't more of a "positive role model", thank God you people aren't the writers of this show... how boring. I saw the movie The Family Stone last night-- an okay movie, but of course the gay son had to be the perfect, sweet, hearing-impaired sympathetic character with the perfect loving partner and no relationship problems. I commend Marc Cherry for not taking this easy way out.
Posted by: Robert | Jan 9, 2006 11:23:56 PM
"We've all experienced that awkward moment when mom tries to serve you fresh OJ and croissants in bed, and instead catches you naked with your lab partner, right?"
LOL! That's one of the best hypothetical questions I've heard in a long time!
Towleroad is an incredible blog, btw. :)
Posted by: jde549 | Jan 9, 2006 11:49:09 PM
I love it! I love it! I love it!
Posted by: VINCENT | Jan 10, 2006 12:17:09 AM
I never particularly liked DH but I have to say that the character of Andrew seemed like a breath of fresh air as far as gays on TV. Yes he is punk but I would rather see that than yet another sissy pixey drama queen like the kid from My Soo Called Life or the disturbingly asexual homosexuals Jack from Dawson's Creek and Will from Will and Grace. His personality makes perfect sense to me seeing what kind of time warped crack job mom he has!
Posted by: Jake | Jan 10, 2006 12:19:02 AM
I'm just sick of the whole gay boys thing on Wisteria Lane.
When are the power lesbians with the baby going to move into the neighborhood to replace the void that is Nicollette Sheridan!!! Ouch!
Posted by: Mr. GuyTVBlog | Jan 10, 2006 2:22:46 AM
"breath of fresh air"? "punk"?--at least "not boring"?--Andrew is a killer. Involuntary manslaughter, but A KILLER! I suppose you can't wait for "John Wayne Gacy, The Miniseries--A Story of A Clown Who Just Liked To Bury Little Boys Under His House." Or how about, "The Jeffrey Dahmer Cook Book--Next Week On The Food Channel"? Dump the Tina, girls--it's destroying your memory and your judgment.
Posted by: Leland | Jan 10, 2006 2:27:43 AM
Um, none of the characters on Desperate Housewives are likeable, why should Andrew be any different?
Andy (Towle), however, now there's a likeable character!
Posted by: Erik | Jan 10, 2006 3:11:41 AM
DH. Ugh. Why not have the gay boy hook up with the blatantly gay - and evidently psycho - pharmacist who was dating Bree and killing her husband?
Guys - how can you look to see ANY semblance of solid character portrayal, gay or otherwise, in a show where: one 'housewife' sneaks out of a party to mow the lawn so her husband won't fire the lawnboy she's fucking, and SHE DOESN'T LIFT AND TIE UP THE TRAIN OF HER LONG, LONG GOWN? Did Peter Jackson have Kong recite Byron to Naomi Watts? A little realism, even in dumbass fantasy, is necessary.
Posted by: Jacko | Jan 10, 2006 3:37:28 AM
Leland is bordering on hyperventilation as ususal. Quick, someone get him a paper bag.
Posted by: jon | Jan 10, 2006 9:20:34 AM
Leland is bordering on hyperventilation as usual. Quick, someone get him a paper bag.
Posted by: jon | Jan 10, 2006 9:21:51 AM
The show has hinted all along that Andy's hitting on the Carnes character only to piss off his mom.
That was even more in evidence in the last scene of this episode when Andy lost interest in Ryan because Andy could no longer blackmail his mother.
My problem is with the Carnes character. Why isn't he pissed that Andy's using him like that?
Okay, Andy is a bi or straight sociopath, but Ryan is a gay doormat.
Posted by: Marc | Jan 10, 2006 9:58:06 AM
I thought the show was back to it's first year form. I was getting bored but this was a great episode all the way around. And the boy flesh did not hurt. I love it again, it is one shark jumping scene after another.
I want to be entertained and I am. For those who expect more give it up. It's TV for pete's sake just sit back and enjoy or turn it off.
Posted by: Donald | Jan 10, 2006 10:00:56 AM
Hey!, Don't forget this is WISTERIA LANE, not your "Average" North American Street!
How many of us grew up on a street like that,not one ranchhouse in the bunch. beside's both my partner and myself would love to see a hot backyard kiss between Andrew's "Lab Partner" and Betty Applewhites hot son, he is one goodlooking man.........
Posted by: Darrell | Jan 10, 2006 11:25:17 AM
Who would have thunk it? The two gay boys are the hottest couple on Wisteria Lane. I am so loving these two and I wish they'd live happily ever after but I don't think that's going to be the case. As much as I am so loving thw fact that the relationship between Justin and Andrew is beginning to deepen, I kind of feel bad for them since Andrew's feelings for Justin are tainted by this whole revenge thing with Bree. I pity Justin because he just might end up as collateral damage and I pity Andrew because he might just lose a great guy because he is so screwed up.
That and the rumors about what Andrew is going to do with someone much older later on.
Posted by: Glenn | Jan 10, 2006 11:46:24 AM
Well, Andrew's not straight because the Teri Hatcher's Susan Mayer accidentally walked in on him and his "lab partner" naked and making out in the dark in his pool after a party last season. He was shown as questioning his sexuality in a couple of later eps.
But it would also seem he's leading on Ryan Carnes' character to piss off his mother, as evidenced by the final scene of them kissing (as someone already mentioned).
For those who didn't see it, there was a montage of characters kissing (the theme of the ep) and they showed Andrew in the gazebo in the dark, backed up against a pole, and looking away apparently with impatience or boredom (it was a quick shot) as his boyfriend passionately kissed his neck. The Mary Alice voiceover narration was that this kiss represented "a lover's growing passion" (which ties in with Carnes' character revealing to Gaby last season that he and Andrew were initiually just f*ck buddies, but now he felt he was falling in love).
And I'm now just realizing I knew WAY more about this than I thought...
Posted by: Turtle | Jan 10, 2006 11:52:56 AM
Leland, once again you are a ranting idiot. You are actually making a comparison between a boy who accidentally hits his car into a person who runs into the street at the darkness of night with a sociopathic mass-murderer like Jeffrey Dahmer who brutally tortured AND ATE his victims? Your stupidity should be banned from this site.
Posted by: Robert | Jan 10, 2006 1:17:11 PM
Jon and Robert, my biggest fans. THANK YOU!
If your mommies will let you stay online a little longer, I'll clarify for you. It should be unnecessary, but then the ability to think is, unfortunately, not a prerequisite for driving a PC.
The issue is not that he accidentally hit someone [though, in fact, I acknowledged that when referencing INVOLUNTARY manslaughter]. It is that he did not stop to help; showed absolutely no remorse but only fear of getting caught; and was happy to let his parents cover up for him and then quickly forgot about it. In fact, had she not participated in that coverup, Bree could have thrown back to him when he was trying to blackmail her that HE effectively let the woman die just as much as she did the pharmacist. Score tied. Fuck off, son. And, read this slowly, maybe you'll get it this time: I was not comparing Andrew to Gacy, Dahmer, or anyone else. I was comparing the indifference of some posters to the dramatization of the criminal acts [again: what he did AFTER he hit her] of one gay person [albeit fictional] with possible indifference to our being smeared by shows about Dahmer, et al. Huge difference, but then perhaps I was ranting too loud for you to think.
Posted by: Leland | Jan 10, 2006 1:59:31 PM
Ummm... Leland, I'm a bit concerned that maybe you don't realize that this is a TV show. What happens inside of that box in your family room is not real. Its make-believe. Most sane people understand the difference.
Posted by: Robert | Jan 10, 2006 4:49:37 PM
Even thought I do think of Marc Cherry as one of those spineless behind the scenes powerful gays who masks compliance with hetero-norms as individuality like saying anything film/tv show that features/introduces a gay charachter from the beginning is representative of a gay agenda, I don't think it's fair to claim that he doing harm by presenting gay sterotypes on his show given that this primary draw of this show that set it off from others was it's darkness, virtually devoid of any untained, wholesome charachters.
Presenting gay people as more wholesome than all the other deviant straight people would have been an artistic betrayl, dishonest, 'agenda'like'. In a word, that would have been tired.
Posted by: Chad Hanging | Jan 10, 2006 9:01:04 PM
Yawn.
Posted by: jon | Jan 10, 2006 10:29:21 PM
I also enjoyed the scene out in the garden during the final words @ the end.
I love the addition of the pic to the "a blog with homosexual tendencies" banner at the top.
Posted by: Jake | Jan 11, 2006 4:12:42 PM
THANK YOU! Just one request....can we get Leland to post immediately following the show next week? I've not laughed so hard in weeks.
I was going to comment on how people wouldn't watch a tv show with boring, "normal", people - gay or straight, but I find it much more entertaining to read the posts of people like Leland getting upset over the inclusion of gay people at all.
Just curious -- which of those on Wisteria Lane are part of the "relatively large REGULAR cast"? If you think ANY of the characters on Desperate Housewives are "regular" then maybe you should write more about YOUR life....sounds like it might be entertaining.
Keep up the good work DH and Towleroad!
Posted by: Jeff | Jan 16, 2006 9:40:14 AM