11/14/2006
Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka on an 'Outing'
Recently out Neil Patrick Harris and his partner David Burtka are snapped taking a Sunday stroll in L.A.
Reuters takes on the issue of 'outing' celebrities and notes that "up until relatively recently, agents and publicists could be counted on to keep clients closeted if they so chose. That just isn't feasible anymore in a culture where a celebrity's personal life is just another stage for mandatory performance."
Also questioned is the age-old question of how coming out will affect an actor's career: "Neither Harris nor [T.R.] Knight are in the mold of the traditional leading man, and that's a huge distinction. That type of role is predicated on an actor's sex appeal to the opposite gender. Absurd as it sounds, on some level viewers have to believe the object of their affection could somehow reciprocate their attraction."
In a perfect world, it would have no effect. However, a photo above can do wonders for a kid struggling with his sexuality who needs some kind of example. Paparazzi snapshots are often valued by how much they can shock. But here's one instance in which mundanity can have real power.
Knight, Harris Outings a Product of the Times [reuters]
Posted 9:59 AM EST by Andy Towle in David Burtka, I'm Gay, Neil Patrick Harris, News, T.R. Knight | Permalink
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I don't believe in outing anyone. At the same time, it's great when people choose to come out in order to help others do the same.
Wish them (and everyone who's gay in Hollywood) lots of luck. How they choose to confront the issue now will help many more down the road.
Posted by: mark | Nov 14, 2006 10:07:24 AM
The more visible we become, the less issue there will be. People are always uncomfortable with things they don't understand. Seeing two men walk down a street with groceries and dogs is exactly the type of activity most straight people (without any gay friends) might not think of.
Just like coming out to your family, expect it to take time and education for the public to accept that there are gay men and women working in hollywood, as with everywhere else.
Posted by: ogden | Nov 14, 2006 10:13:02 AM
"Absurd as it sounds, on some level viewers have to believe the object of their affection could somehow reciprocate their attraction."
Really, because as a gay man I've lusted after plenty of straight leading men without thinking they would love me back.
Posted by: Ken | Nov 14, 2006 10:14:16 AM
Ken-
Brilliant debate point. I would agree. It's absurd to think that people can't be attracted to other people unless it's based on sexual desire.
What about friendships?
Bill
Posted by: Bill | Nov 14, 2006 10:28:56 AM
Ken, your the minority.
Posted by: Babydaddy | Nov 14, 2006 10:29:35 AM
Agreed. I often comment to my partner that he and I would make really boring "reality" TV. I agree with Ogden regarding visibility, and that through our mundaneness. I have seen other readers of this blog call that "trying to fit into a hetero world". Not at all. Some of us are just born to be mundane.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Posted by: KJ | Nov 14, 2006 10:30:11 AM
Where are all those cynical "who cares" comments like with Danny and Paul? I hope we don't get any more of that here.
Posted by: Paul | Nov 14, 2006 10:30:31 AM
I'm much more attracted to a person's energy than their sexual orientation.
Posted by: D.T. | Nov 14, 2006 10:30:35 AM
We all love reading about who's dating who or the break up of Reese and Ryan. So why should a gay actors love life be off limits? Report on their love lives the same as the straight "stars".
Posted by: ousslander | Nov 14, 2006 10:30:43 AM
I think people should be out if they want to be out. It's not really a decision we should make for anyone. I only hate it that some gays HAVE to hide their sexuality, and that disturbs me. I don't necessarily condone PEREZ's recent 'outings'...or like some are calling, being "Lanced"....
Posted by: Roy | Nov 14, 2006 10:36:18 AM
I think it's reprehensible for any gay man to support Perez Hilton (aka. Mario L) or his website--and no, I don't read it anymore.
He has done nothing for our community other than to project the very stereotype that many of us would prefer go away: Bitchy Angry Queen.
Posted by: Jeff. K. | Nov 14, 2006 10:41:30 AM
Tend to agree with you, Jeff. Think reading PH's website is asking for bad karma.
You feed it, it grows. You ignore it, it goes.
Posted by: Rob | Nov 14, 2006 10:44:04 AM
Great! Now the Stalkarazzi will be after poor Neil Patrick too. Of course those vultures wouldn't have a job if the insatiable American appetite for gossip wasn't so out of control a la "We all love reading about who's dating who or the break up of Reese and Ryan. So why should a gay actors love life be off limits? Report on their love lives the same as the straight 'stars'." I work with a girl who flat out says celebs shouldn't have private lives, that their business is hers. We're one fucked up culture.
Posted by: cullan | Nov 14, 2006 10:46:22 AM
This is an excellent post from Towleroad with closing comments from Andy. It is why I come back to this site several times a day.
Posted by: Mark Hutt | Nov 14, 2006 10:46:49 AM
who cares
two more rich people
Posted by: kuros | Nov 14, 2006 11:02:01 AM
"But here's one instance in which mundanity can have real power."
Well put.
Posted by: Jerry | Nov 14, 2006 11:07:34 AM
Perez Hilton has a legit point -- he reports on the private lives of public figures, so why is it so wrong to say that a guy is dating another guy? Who cares about the closet?
No one cares about anyone's feelings or the consequences of a news item on someone's life in other areas. If an actor is secretly cheating on his wife with a female co-star, papers have no problem reporting that tidbit, regardless of the devastation it causes. If it's a male co-star, instead of a female, suddenly we're supposed to shut up and respect his space? No thanks.
So long as we treat "gay" as a shameful disease, we'll never get full equality. Out them all. And if you have a problem with that, who cares? We'll do it anyway. =)
Posted by: Hank | Nov 14, 2006 11:32:39 AM
We definitely need more out celebs, athletes and politicians, boring or no, particularly younger ones, for the reasons stated. The problem is that few are brave enough to do that. In the Internet age, as stated in the article, there are so many voices that rumors are going to fly no matter what, so we have moved from an age where no one outside of Hollywood knows about Rock Hudson to everyone knows about TC or JT (aka VB), but everyone plays stupid. It becomes an issue for their careers if the rumors become worse than reality (NPH) or too blatently true (LB). What lies are we obligated to uphold? I don't think anyone is shy in these forums talking about who or who is not gay, even if they have not come out (KM). Are we all supposed to lie now? It's a case of damned if you do (PH) or damned if you don't (lying).
Posted by: Anon | Nov 14, 2006 11:33:45 AM
Hank-
You sound like a bitter troll. Am I close?
Posted by: Johnny | Nov 14, 2006 11:40:32 AM
I can’t help but feel the Reuters article was a thinly veiled poke at a famous romantic leading man named George by the author Andrew Wallenstein. I think it’s insulting calling TR Knight “one of the girls”, “Take Knight, for instance. As Dr. George O'Malley, Knight is practically one of the girls on "Grey's,"
Posted by: ggreen | Nov 14, 2006 11:58:32 AM
Johnny, Hank actually has a valid point. Why would we perpetuate the double standard? Closet cases absolutely set us back and help permeate the myth of shamefulness. We should just as easily hear about Neil Patrick Harris' love life just as much as we hear about Lindsay Lohan's.
Posted by: jeff | Nov 14, 2006 12:08:06 PM
Neil Patrick Harris was the very charming host of the L.A. Stage Alliance's Ovation awards last night (11/13). While he appeared in a nominated play ("All My Sons" at the Geffen Playhouse) he wasn't nominated for his performance which prompted him, in his opening remarks, to accuse the Ovation voters of being homophobic. After a second of silence, the audience roared with laughter...
Posted by: Joe | Nov 14, 2006 12:13:24 PM
seeing this photo makes me happy but i'm not sure I'm down with pseudo-press outing people. By outing them, they are making it a press point and the whole point is that it's no big deal and a non-issue. (or am I just completely delusional?)
Posted by: Vance | Nov 14, 2006 12:15:10 PM
Kuros, why would you assume they are rich? Burtka is primarily a stage actor and believe me--they don't make that much unless they are stars. NPH has a TV show but that also doesn't guarantee wealth. Also, even if they are gainfully employed does that mean we shouldn't care about them? I've met them and they are genuinely kind and considerate people who do actually care about others.
Posted by: Daniel | Nov 14, 2006 12:38:57 PM
Last night's studio 60 had an interesting dialogue about journalism laws in Brazil. There, journalists must have a college degree in journalism and pass a certification exam. Once doing so, they can print anything they like, so freedom of the press is guaranteed - but there is an element of quality control that stops folks like Perez. We do expect the same of lawyers and doctors....
I also avoid Perez. Pink is the new Perez.
Posted by: Dan B | Nov 14, 2006 12:40:16 PM