09/10/2007
Britney Spears Delivers Trainwreck Rather than Comeback at VMAs
Here's the opening of last night's MTV Video Music Awards, a mind-numbingly awful Britney Spears performance that kicked off perhaps the most unwatchable VMAs ever.
Word is that Britney was upset because she overheard Sarah Silverman rehearsing her monologue backstage, which made fun of her children. There was no sign whatsoever of the Criss Angel smoke-and-mirrors routine that was rumored to be part of the opening number. Unfortunately for Ms. Spears, the routine lacked any magic whatsoever.
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She looked so uninterested in what she was doing. I expected her at any minute to say "f-k this, I'm going home," and walk off the stage.
Sad little girl.
Posted by: shane | Sep 10, 2007 8:31:05 AM
As far as the VMAs being unwatchable, I must agree. I was thinking last night during my attempt at watching that I must have reached that age, that the show could be fine and it is just my tolerance for questionable productions, and Hip Hop has reached it's limit. No, the show was blatantly vile. Ms. Spears should have yet again stayed home with her children. She is clearly not yet ready for prime-time, what with her still thick body and a hair weave de-marking her hair re-growth rather than camouflaging it, as well as very unsteady foot work. Britney did not even seem sure of what she was doing out there on stage, I had a feeling she was about to topple over any moment.
Posted by: Critifur | Sep 10, 2007 8:33:30 AM
The VMAs have been unwatchable for quite a few years now. I'm surprised anyone still tries.
Posted by: phil | Sep 10, 2007 8:41:46 AM
Not to defend the trainwreck that is Britany, but
Sarah isn't funnyman cracking tastless jokes about one's kids could throw anyone off. That doesn't excuse the fat one bit.
Brit should have come out, yanked those extensions off all ghetto like, said "it's on (insert antisemitic word here and see how she liked that tastless bit)", and kicked the shit out of sarah flopman
Posted by: no excuse for the fat, but | Sep 10, 2007 8:42:50 AM
Wait... the VMAs still air? In what country?!
Posted by: DW | Sep 10, 2007 8:43:13 AM
I should mention for those who are only watching the above clip
The so called comedian (everything she touches ends up flopping) Sarah Silvermann cracked jokes about Britts kids that were beyond tasteless.
Before anyone flames away, jokes about someone's children automaticaly make ethnic slurs A-OK and Brit should gone at it all ghetto like on sarah with ethnic slurs flying and see how she liked it.
Still no excuse for the fat.
Posted by: no excuse for the fat, but | Sep 10, 2007 8:46:41 AM
Criss Angel WAS there. Didn't you see him make Britney's career disappear?
Posted by: Andrew | Sep 10, 2007 8:53:32 AM
that "piece-of-tailspin" is only slightly worse than her very best work. after ten years of enduring that vapid mouseketeer hack... THANK GOD (and Paris Hilton) it's finally over.
unfortunately the aftermath smells of her suicide and/or a year of Dannielynnesque coverage of Spears' spawn.
Posted by: A.J | Sep 10, 2007 9:02:23 AM
This was a trainwreck, y'all, but a sort of trainwreck (okay, not sort of, at all) in ways never imagined.
Britney's performance at the VMAs tonight was Madonna 20 years ago on a very bad day. On second thought, Madonna never had a day on stage as bad as this performance was...even at any time during the horrendous Girly Show tour. All thru Britney's performance tonight, I kept thinking, "Madonna did all of this 20 years ago" (foot on a man's back, falling backward into the arms of attentive men, using a man as a step-down, frolicking in her underwear -- even Nelly Fertado's finale was a Madonna-like homage to the 1990 VMAs "Vogue" performance with the feathered fans but without the Dangerous Liasons get-up) but Madonna would have never gone on stage to do a sloppy performance like this. Her moves weren't sharp, everything seemed to be in a faze of alcohol (or some other intoxicant), and I hate to say it but she needs to lose about 10 or 15 pounds if she wants to wear that outfit on stage. It appears that the rumors of her preference for partying this past week over rehearsing were all true. The bored expressions of some of the people in the audience summed up the performance very well. I was left empty and not necessarily wanting more. I WANT her to do better (almost as much as I want her to get her act together clean and sober for the sake of her children) and if she has people around her applauding her for a shit performance such as this, she should very much consider getting people around her who will push her to be sharper and get cleaned up.
Posted by: Dean | Sep 10, 2007 9:03:39 AM
I feel bad for the girl. What a mess.
Posted by: Wes | Sep 10, 2007 9:21:15 AM
I don't enjoy watching Britney Spears' protracted (and very obviously painful) fall from grace.
I also think Sarah Silverman's setting herself up for a very large dose of karmic humility too. To spitefully mock someone so obviously lost is quite repulsive, I think.
Posted by: FASTLAD | Sep 10, 2007 9:25:32 AM
Britney seemed totally distracted and totally ready to go home. ...they showed some clips of Britney practicing her routine from the past few days and they looked so much better... I don't know what was going on but it was damn sad and embarassing to watch.
Posted by: Rob (lrdarystar) | Sep 10, 2007 9:25:40 AM
She wasn't confident. I think she was up there knowing that everyone was watching her, probably going to make fun of her. She seemed to be embarassed while she was performing, because she knows that she's become the bud of everyone's jokes.
And I agree Fastlad, its horrible to kick someone when they're down like that. Britney Spears has had sooo many f*ck ups in the last few years, but she's human and being cruel towards her only makes it worse.
Posted by: Wes | Sep 10, 2007 9:34:23 AM
I don't know if this counts as a trainwreck because it was obvious she wasn't giving it her all anyway. Like she just wanted the number to be done with, no effort. She didn't miss the steps, she knew the blocking.. she just wasn't bringing it. A disaster is when you give it your all and it's still painfully craptastic in the end.
Nevertheless, THIS needed to happen. Here's praying she finds her priorities. So many fanatics were clamoring for a comeback, for her to unleash a spectacular VMA performance, as if it was the most important thing she had to do right now. Nevermind her personal problems, they just wanted their Britney doll back. So they could play with her and vicariously live that sick celeb diva superstar life they just need.
Posted by: Jedd | Sep 10, 2007 9:35:30 AM
What I fail to understand is why people continue to give this person the benefit of the doubt. Unlike her contemporary Xtina, she *never* had any real singing talent. Her success was driven by her dance performance and a very well-cultivated image assembled by a crack team of handlers and marketers. All of that crumbled a long time ago, revealing a persona nothing like the one crafted for her. Without that, the empress (?) was left with no clothes. Yet MTV and legions of fans still seem willing to give her another shot, and another, and another. What's that saying, "Fool me once...?"
Posted by: Davey | Sep 10, 2007 9:35:32 AM
This clip says it all... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cY_QDvS1amY
Posted by: Peter Griffin | Sep 10, 2007 9:37:07 AM
I was expecting a train wreck and I got one. But I don't feel sorry for her at all. Neither she or the newest black-man to join the human race, Justin Timblerlake. I anticipated seeing a lot of raucous behavior from the other performers and I got what I was looking for and then some.
I had to miss the end of the show as work loomed and sleep was necessary. U-tube proved I made the right decision. I just can't feel for someone while I'm at the grindstone, I mean the 8-6:30; and she rakes in 700K a month even without performing badly.
Just ain't got the time.
Posted by: lexxicuss | Sep 10, 2007 10:17:00 AM
Like Wes, I dislike watching a trainwreck, a good description of Britney Spears since her dance album; it's disheartening. But I also miss the Britney Doll, who was a great performer and deserved all of the money and attention her fans threw at her. It's the core reason people still care about her. She used to be a whole lot of fun to watch!
It's true she makes terrible decisions. As an aside I'm not sure I would be making publicity-friendly decisions either if my entire life was being documented by gossip photographers.
I liked her performance. I'm not sure if it will give her any life motivation, but she at least knew the routine and she can still dance. I have my hopes up.
Posted by: James | Sep 10, 2007 10:28:21 AM
loved the clip. mall walking around the stage, mumbling while the backing track bubbles along. debbie allen choreography with a dollop of burlesque tease. its a bore and we all know it - MTV - now like 'misshapes' is officially over. let britney do her sid vicious and piss on the whole mess as she walks off the stage.
next year its the KLF. 4real.
also--- Silverman is just a liberal, Jewish version of Coulter's schitck. so provocative and 'outrageous'. now if she could just manage to sell a ticket to one of her productions, she'd be onto something.
Posted by: resurrect | Sep 10, 2007 10:51:28 AM
Agree with all the above. Please, Britney, go home and raise your kids. Your 15 minutes - 10 years, in this case - are over.
Posted by: Jack Scribe | Sep 10, 2007 11:05:24 AM
three words: britney nicole spears
Posted by: psgoodguy | Sep 10, 2007 11:09:17 AM
three words: britney nicole spears
Posted by: psgoodguy | Sep 10, 2007 11:09:27 AM
three words: britney nicole spears
Posted by: psgoodguy | Sep 10, 2007 11:09:39 AM
...now if what was said about sarah's monologue was true, what would have been really entertaining is for the curtain to have gone up for us to have found britany in a "Jesus Is Magic" t-shirt with her foot deep in sarah's ass...maybe wack ass jimmy kimmel, sarah's 'partner', will feature such a skit on his lame ass show...i'm not a britney booster, but that excuses the mood during the performance for me...and for those who think that britney should have just sucked it up, (no pun intended), and silverman as funny, i'm so sure she is, so long as she's not talking about YOUR kids...! bitch...
Posted by: yeahisaidit | Sep 10, 2007 11:18:22 AM
Evidently, str8 men are SO desperate for wank material that talentless vessels like Britney, Jessica Simpson, Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, etc. are elevated to star status where, unfortunately, the rest of us are subjected to them. Alas, pop culture is not a meritocracy.
Posted by: Andy G. | Sep 10, 2007 11:19:57 AM
BOYCOTT Sara Silverman's NEW SHOW !!! Where was Gwen , and Bono , and Bon Jovi , and any of the other great artists … how about even Fergie or Shakira …. everyone from the “hood” made it …. oh … & Justine …… MTV … wow … you’ve come a long way baby …… it’s a shame ! Brittany needed a few more clothes … her performance was ok …. but the person who was REALLY bad was Sara Silverman …. IT is SOO TACKY and LOW CLASS to put down someone’s children …. does she have any …. I would say NOT !!!! BOYCOTT HER NEW SHOW ON COMEDY CENTRAL >>>>>>
Posted by: sherry | Sep 10, 2007 11:29:47 AM
BOYCOTT Sara Silverman's NEW SHOW !!! Where was Gwen , and Bono , and Bon Jovi , and any of the other great artists … how about even Fergie or Shakira …. everyone from the “hood” made it …. oh … & Justine …… MTV … wow … you’ve come a long way baby …… it’s a shame ! Brittany needed a few more clothes … her performance was ok …. but the person who was REALLY bad was Sara Silverman …. IT is SOO TACKY and LOW CLASS to put down someone’s children …. does she have any …. I would say NOT !!!! BOYCOTT HER NEW SHOW ON COMEDY CENTRAL >>>>>>
Posted by: sherry | Sep 10, 2007 11:30:21 AM
BOYCOTT Sara Silverman's NEW SHOW !!! Where was Gwen , and Bono , and Bon Jovi , and any of the other great artists … how about even Fergie or Shakira …. everyone from the “hood” made it …. oh … & Justine …… MTV … wow … you’ve come a long way baby …… it’s a shame ! Brittany needed a few more clothes … her performance was ok …. but the person who was REALLY bad was Sara Silverman …. IT is SOO TACKY and LOW CLASS to put down someone’s children …. does she have any …. I would say NOT !!!! BOYCOTT HER NEW SHOW ON COMEDY CENTRAL >>>>>>
Posted by: sherry | Sep 10, 2007 11:30:28 AM
BOYCOTT Sara Silverman's NEW SHOW !!! Where was Gwen , and Bono , and Bon Jovi , and any of the other great artists … how about even Fergie or Shakira …. everyone from the “hood” made it …. oh … & Justine …… MTV … wow … you’ve come a long way baby …… it’s a shame ! Brittany needed a few more clothes … her performance was ok …. but the person who was REALLY bad was Sara Silverman …. IT is SOO TACKY and LOW CLASS to put down someone’s children …. does she have any …. I would say NOT !!!! BOYCOTT HER NEW SHOW ON COMEDY CENTRAL >>>>>>
Posted by: sherry | Sep 10, 2007 11:30:33 AM
Jesus. I mean, just . . . Jesus.
Also, I wonder if Sherry wants us to boycott "Sara" Silverman's new show?
Posted by: Joel | Sep 10, 2007 11:49:07 AM
God I really hate all of you. Do no commenters on this site have a sense of humor?
Sarah's jokes were funny. Nothing is off limits to humor.
I was hoping Sarah would call Britney out on her "performance." Now THAT would've been tasteless and AMAZING.
Posted by: JLS | Sep 10, 2007 12:25:23 PM
The video is disabled. The VMA's were always known for nosedives and unspeakable acts--it's their way of getting attention without having to work too hard. They always go for shock and mock, as in "Did you see that!". Like almost all award shows, not worth watching in the end.
Posted by: anon (gmail.com) | Sep 10, 2007 12:28:58 PM
I am to boycott Sarah Silverman because she made fun of Britney's woes and kids? i think I'd rather send her 20 bucks.
Posted by: marco | Sep 10, 2007 12:38:52 PM
God, the Sarah Silverman Defense is about as believable as the Twinkie Defense. First, Sarah was fuckin' hilarious. The room was dead because they were numb by the Britney bomb, it's a wild, wide open space so stand-up is not really going to work there and then Sarah is so mean if you're a star you're thinking "Jeez, don't pick me out in the crowd..." But aside from that, she didn't make fun of Britney's children, she made fun of Britney by calling them adorable mistakes. To believe that Britney knew Sarah would specifically mention her children, and that this somehow spooked Britney, you'd have to be her most deluded superfan. The truth is, Britney is an addict with mental issues who partied till 3am in the nights leading up to her performance. On top of that, she has ZERO talent...some of her songs are fun, but she needn't have been present when any of them were recorded. She DOES NOT sing live, she has now lost her dancing agility and she has no creative input, so what's left? Nothing. You're rooting for nothing. At least if you're rooting against Britney you're rooting against the industry that is selfishly trying to hoist her up for one last cash-cow corpse dance. Everyone around her and anyone who patronizes her new CD is just enabling her to wobble toward an early death. The girl is a nice girl in person. Can't anyone around her force her into treatment?
Posted by: Matthew Rettenmund | Sep 10, 2007 12:44:52 PM
I'm no Britney fan, and I like Sarah Silverman's show, but she just wasn't funny last night IMO. That's quite simply why the laughs were sparse.
Posted by: Wes | Sep 10, 2007 12:51:28 PM
I thought Sarah was hilarious as usual. She and Kathy Griffin both go to town on celebrities, and of course, those jokes arent going to go over well in a room full of celebrities. Jennifer Garner does not want video of herself laughing at Britney vagina jokes, no matter if she thought it was the funniest thing in the world..They arent going to show it with a camera in their face like that.
Britney was just awful. I know she doesnt sing live (and honestly, most people at the VMAs dont sing live, even full fledged bands and rappers) but where was the performance? It was just a mess.
Posted by: Chris in Seattle | Sep 10, 2007 1:03:49 PM
Chris
Brit's vagina is fair game. Last night was brit's kids which are not fair game. If you think anyone's kids are fair game then the state should make sure you never have or get near kids.
Posted by: no excuse for the fat, but | Sep 10, 2007 1:09:48 PM
Sarah Silverman is especially funny when people don't take her seriously and chill the fuck out.
Britney needs to retire and start raising her kids and maybe then she can make a comeback...as a mother.
Posted by: James | Sep 10, 2007 1:13:43 PM
Sarah Silverman was hilarious!
Britney's kids ARE mistakes and y'all fcking know it. She's a alcohlic oxycontin addict who probably sleeps with cheetos and slurpee cups in her bed, who walks into gas station bathrooms sans footwear, and who likes to flash her chockcha.
Posted by: astromonks | Sep 10, 2007 1:16:08 PM
To the Britney Defenders who say leave her alone, WTF?!! The woman took a paying JOB that happened to appear on my TV. She clearly did not prepare for it (you could see her remembering her choreography with dead eyes and stomping from mark to mark). If you can not prepare for your JOB or do your JOB, you deserve to be called on it. And as for the kids, if she wasn't parading them for conveniently-alerted Paparazi every time she went out of the house, I'd maybe buy it. But SHE put herself out there, SHE took the JOB, and she sucked royally at it. No excuses.
ANd Sarah SIlverman was not brilliant, but to call her equivalent of ANne Coulter is to miss a point - Sarah is posited as an outrageous comedian -- Coulter is somehow posited as a journalist or analyst. Bull$hit.
Posted by: Strepsi | Sep 10, 2007 1:18:09 PM
I think the performance wasn't so bad at all. I like the song. The choreography was very good even if Britney's participation in it wasn't so apparent. Let's not forget that to put on a performance is a hell of a job and after having two kids and pure hell media coverage we'd all be nervous to get back on stage in such an exposed extend. I think we should give her a break. Who would cope well with that kind of pressure?
Posted by: Karst | Sep 10, 2007 1:40:08 PM
James and others
lets drop the words kids and add jews or kikes are mistakes
How much deffending of Sarah silverman can you spew forth now.
Brit's vagina and trainwreck life are all fair game, but kids aren't.
If you think they are then lets give a pass to ethnic jokes and all "and chill the fuck out" as you said above.
Posted by: no excuse for the fat, but | Sep 10, 2007 1:51:00 PM
Um, let me see how I can make this point without being too obvious about it? For those (both on here and elsewhere trying to make this point) saying that "she's had two kids" as an excuse for a bad performance need to remember that as a performer they are payed and watched to PERFORM. Clearly the pressure was on and she knew it. The bitch is 25 YEARS OLD! There are other performers, much older than that, that have also pumped out a few kids and still act like FUCKING PROFESSIONALS when it comes to doing what they are paid to do. This bitch didn't even bother to phone it in. Really, the whole thing is just sad. But, I really like the song (not that she had much to do with that). :)
Posted by: JR | Sep 10, 2007 2:02:33 PM
I don't understand why so many people feel sorry for Britney... based on her performance last evening, she has a very promising future in drug abuse and porn. "It's Britney, Bitch..." Are you kidding??? Seriously???
I have ALWAYS maintained this about Ms. Britney Spears - "You can take the trash out of the trailer but you can't take the trailer out of the trash."
And as far as the rest of the MTV awards show went last evening, it too might as well be rented out at Blockbuster in the porn section because MTV whored themselves out by becoming the cheap commercial slut it has manifested into over the years.
I hope to God that whoever was responsible for this year's cast of characters (from Britney's opening act to following it up with shock queen of comedy Sarah Silverman's at-that-moment awkward jabs) ends up with a job as the "paper towel holder" in Britney's first porn movie.
Posted by: Denni | Sep 10, 2007 2:07:20 PM
No Excuse For The Fat, But: (Britney, is that you?)
Sorry, you cannot compare talking about somebodies children to saying negative things about a whole race of people.
Sorry, but Brits kids are fair game. She's put them out there. She's dropped them, She's smoked in front of them. She's driven with them on her lap. Her kids are fair game, just as much as Michael Jacksons kids were when he was dangling them off buildings.
If she doesnt want her kids names on the lips of comedians, and on the cover of magazines with the words Help Me spelled out over top, she needs to stop making them national news stories.
Posted by: Chris in Seattle | Sep 10, 2007 2:10:05 PM
Little FYI.... Last night Britney was caught panty-less getting out of a car going to a post VMA bash. Her va-jay-jay looks cavernous as ever. Check it out http://coedmagazine.com/entertainment/2324
Posted by: sg | Sep 10, 2007 2:59:39 PM
From my perspective, she's had a couple of kids, getting back to a size -3 isn't as easy as some people obviously think.
Frankly, garbage like the VMAs are the reason America is seen as a cultural vacuum. The music's crap, the people are crap, and the production values are crap too....
Posted by: Fred Evil | Sep 10, 2007 3:04:36 PM
We've been having quite a laugh talking about Brittany's VMA trainwreck video over at Highbrid Nation. Its ashame, I feel like her comeback has been derailed before its even begun. Oh and someone tell her about that weave. Looks horrible. Just rock the short hair.
Posted by: Evorgleb | Sep 10, 2007 3:10:25 PM
Any kid spawned from K-Fed and this train wreck IS a mistake.
As for Sarah, she's an equal-offender and always has been, so quit with the self-righteousness...or do something productive and rescue BritBrit's kids.
Posted by: Sean | Sep 10, 2007 3:21:56 PM
Fred Evil,
If "getting back to a size -3 isn't as easy as some people obviously think", then she shouldn't have tried to squeeze into that outfit. No? Just sayin'. And though we might be a society overly fixated on how fat or thin someone is, BECAUSE we are a society overly fixated on how fat or thin someone is she should not be surprised that her figure is being talked about. She chose to get naked.
Posted by: JR | Sep 10, 2007 3:34:14 PM
It was so sad, so very very very very very sad... and I ask myself Self? Where are her people? Doesnt she have a manager, agent, stylist? someone to say Brit Brit You arent ready for a public performance yet! Just wait and we will pull out a show stopper when you finaly get your shit together. I mean there had to be a choreographer. I know people like her don't get to make a single decision on her own. Who works for her? because they most absolutely hate her? And was Sarah Silverman inappropraite? Yes but what did we expect? Whose idea at MTV was to put her on right afterwards? I blame everyone involved for wasting 4 minutes of my life.
Posted by: TJC | Sep 10, 2007 3:46:38 PM
...what's funny to some riles others and vice versa, that's all nothing more...nothing less...so, let sarah bring her family out so we can have a laugh
Posted by: yeahisaidit | Sep 10, 2007 4:50:58 PM
Our long national nightmare is finally over. Britney Spears' TRAIN-WRECK of a "career" has FINALLY come to a very public end...
Posted by: Robert In WeHo | Sep 10, 2007 5:01:35 PM
I like the song - it's quite fun, dance-able and sexy!
Posted by: intertextual | Sep 10, 2007 5:32:39 PM
Madonna Rules! Enough Said.
Posted by: Paul | Sep 10, 2007 8:51:05 PM
OK, so Broccoli Spears is not a Size 3. Big deal, neither am I.
I do know better, however, than to try putting my "bait and tackle" into a Speedo and, God Forbid, parading it on television. Since poor Broccoli doesn't have the good sense that her Mama gave her, how is she going to pass any good sense on to her own children?
Speaking of jokes, you wingnuts that are putting Silverman down for a comedy routine need to grab a dollar and go downtown and buy a clue. IT'S A COMEDY ROUTINE. Public figures, and their families, are OPEN GAME. Not saying it's right or fair or correct in this universe, IT JUST IS and will probably always be that way.
And you guys that defend Britney? Oh, please. That bitch is damaged goods.
Posted by: Not Britney's Friend | Sep 10, 2007 9:23:40 PM
Britney Spears has never been anything more than a contrived media invention. The fact that she has garnered as much attention over the years when she should have been a one hit wonder is a testament to the power of marketing. The "comebacks" and continuous coverage of her low-life antics only take place because her marketers still believe they can continue to sell her to her trashy 13 year old fan base. Last nights disaster proves that she is simply not being "handled" well and left to her own talentless devices, she is unworthy of the stage. The whole VMA's are a sad spectacle of desperate, empty posturing. Big yawn. With everything that's taking place globally, no one has anything more relevant to say but "look at me, I'm the biggest ass". What a sad generation.
Posted by: bruiser | Sep 10, 2007 10:51:28 PM
give her a break.... BITCHES..geez.
Posted by: john | Sep 11, 2007 3:25:29 AM
Talking about Sarah's jokes, she just "fired on the red cross": it was too easy to say something awful on Britney, that's why Sarah sucks. And oh, the jew-jokes. They're just cheap, come on. I mean, she pretends to be politically uncorrect, but she's not. When she joked on 50 cent she just exhalted him. Too easy, girl. Karen Walker would have done it better.
Posted by: Riki | Sep 11, 2007 7:16:03 AM
Britney Spears will be the next Anna Nicole Smith if she continues her path. Mark my word!!!!!
Posted by: Benjamin | Sep 12, 2007 12:35:51 AM