Comments

  1. K says

    Culver is up for reelection in 2010, and his numbers don’t look good. You can bet he’s weighing the relative risks and benefits of courting the homophobes.

    And that would be a mistake, of course, unless he intends to try to out-homophobe whoever becomes the GOP candidate. And that’s sure to be a Christianist of the first order.

  2. JD says

    The nature of narcissists’ personality disorder is so profound and so primitive that narcissists damage virtually everyone who comes into contact with them. They hurt their children in ways that are hardly imaginable to anyone who hasn’t been there. Narcissists elicit profound rage primitive wrath and hostility from sane and stable people. This damages the social fabric by alienating the very people who might possibly be able to counterbalance the narcissists’ malign influences.

  3. JD says

    Narcissists are (a) extremely sensitive to personal criticism and (b) extremely critical of other people. They think that they must be seen as perfect or superior or infallible, next to god-like (if not actually divine, then sitting on the right hand of God) — or else they are worthless. There’s no middle ground of ordinary normal humanity for narcissists. They can’t tolerate the least disagreement. In fact, if you say, “Please don’t do that again — it hurts,” narcissists will turn around and do it again harder to prove that they were right the first time; their reasoning seems to be something like “I am a good person and can do no wrong; therefore, I didn’t hurt you and you are lying about it now…” — sorry, folks, I get lost after that. Anyhow, narcissists are habitually cruel in little ways, as well as big ones, because they’re paying attention to their fantasy and not to you, but the bruises on you are REAL, not in your imagination. Thus, no matter how gently you suggest that they might do better to change their ways or get some help, they will react in one of two equally horrible ways: they will attack or they will withdraw. Be wary of wandering into this dragon’s cave — narcissists will say ANYTHING, they will trash anyone in their own self-justification, and then they will expect the immediate restoration of the status quo. They will attack you (sometimes physically) and spew a load of bile, insult, abuse, contempt, threats, etc., and then — well, it’s kind of like they had indigestion and the vicious tirade worked like a burp: “There. Now I feel better. Where were we?” They feel better, so they expect you to feel better, too. They will say you are nothing, worthless, and turn around immediately and say that they love you. When you object to this kind of treatment, they will say, “You just have to accept me the way I am. (God made me this way, so God loves me even if you are too stupid to understand how special I am.)” Accepting them as they are (and staying away from them entirely) is excellent advice. The other “punishment” narcissists mete out is banishing you from their glorious presence — this can turn into a farce, since by this point you are probably praying to be rescued, “Dear God! How do I get out of this?” The narcissist expects that you will be devastated by the withdrawal of her/his divine attention, so that after a while — a few weeks or months (i.e., the next time the narcissist needs to use you for something) — the narcissist will expect you to have learned your lesson and be eager to return to the fold. If you have learned your lesson, you won’t answer that call. They can’t see that they have a problem; it’s always somebody else who has the problem and needs to change. Therapies work at all only when the individual wants to change and, though narcissists hate their real selves, they don’t want to change — they want the world to change. And they criticize, gripe, and complain about almost everything and almost everyone almost all the time. There are usually a favored few whom narcissists regard as absolutely above reproach, even for egregious misconduct or actual crime, and about whom they won’t brook the slightest criticism. These are people the narcissists are terrified of, though they’ll tell you that what they feel is love and respect; apparently they don’t know the difference between fear and love. Narcissists just get worse and worse as they grow older; their parents and other authority figures that they’ve feared die off, and there’s less and less outside influence to keep them in check. ^

  4. JSH says

    Of course they are putting on the pressure already. They want to act while this issue is still fresh. If they wait until 2012, they know they’ll have a much harder time over-turning the decision. After three years of gay marriage in Iowa with no apocalypse, famine, plague…no catastrophic breakdown of society…it’ll undermine all the ads they plan to run predicting exactly that.

    Please no matter where you live, contact the Governor, support One Iowa and other LGBT organizations in the state. We must not let the hatemongers to have a special election.

  5. Bruno says

    I think Culver may be somewhat irrelevant here. They’d have to change the minds of BOTH leaders of both Iowa’s houses in the next 2 weeks, which is highly unlikely. Thus, 2012 seems to be the earliest an initiative could reach the people of Iowa.

  6. daftpunkydavid says

    @ peter.. this is partly why we’re where we are right now. people who only think with their little heads. grow up a little. vote, for a change. do some thing. don’t sit around oogling at “daddy-licious” politicians. this is a serious/important issue; too serious to be joking around like that… i’m getting carried away, but you know what i’m saying.

  7. KJ says

    The point is to get an amendment in the works as quickly as possible. That way, the lawsuit asking the court to stay its marriage decision until there’s been a vote in three years has a chance of being heard. Since this ruling is due to be implemented in about 18 days, having the governor call a special session on the matter is really the only hope opponents have of keeping the flood gates closed, even temporarily. Remember, in Massachusetts there were lawsuits every step of the way, right down to one insisting that legislative leaders could NOT deny the full legislature the right to vote on the issue procedurally because a petition drive to bring the motion was successful. Iowa may not have that sort of citizen-driven process in place at all, but look for everyone involved to be party to a lawsuit sooner rather than later aimed at one of two objectives: stopping–even temporarily–implementation of the decision and forcing a vote at the polls on the rights of homosexual Iowans.

  8. Chris says

    It won’t come before the voters in 2012 Iowa unless the GOP makes significant gains in the 2010 Iowa legislature elections. Even if they do, which is doubtful, marriage equality is gaining by 2% a year (see Nate silver at fivethirtyeight.com) — Nate says that by 2013 a ballot initiative would fail in Iowa — that’s without the factor that people will see married couples in their towns and notice that the sky has not fallen.

  9. says

    Jeez, Hurley is just making stuff up here!

    I’ve read the decision in its entirety and there is absolutely nothing in it about “force of law” that school children will be “taught that homosexual behavior is equivalent of heterosexual behavior.” There’s nothing in the bill about school…period!

    Oh, and the decision did NOT compare anything to slavery and segregation. It simply stated that the Iowa Supreme court had made decisions in the past on those issues and was doing so again on an important issue.

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