1. Joey Y says

    Good for him! Now that world hunger and needy but deserving people are a thing of the past, I can’t personally think of a more selfless way to show off money…

  2. Luke says

    I’m always amazed at the amount of money poured into some of these parties. How about just ‘come of age’ and donate the money to charity instead of a big lavish production?

  3. Dan says

    Maybe so, Erik, but spending thousands of dollars in order to donate thousands of dollars in “gifts” is at the very least silly. It easily could be labeled something worse.

  4. m says

    obviously the kid comes from a privileged family. the average family can’t afford to do this. but it sounds like they are charitable so cut them some slack.

  5. says

    Definition of a bar mitzvah: The religious initiation ceremony of a Jewish boy who has reached the age of 13 and is regarded as ready to observe religious precepts.

    Definition of “make a spectacle of yourself”: To do something that makes you look stupid and attracts other people’s attention.

    As you can see by the above definitions, a bar mitzvah and making a spectacle of yourself are two different things and should never, ever be combined.

  6. Ted B. (Charging Rhino) says

    I never understood expensive bar mitzvahs, confirmations or even lavish, over-the-top weddings. Some punch, a nice cake, maybe some munchies…but.

  7. Brian in Texas says

    Who gives a crap whether the family donated money to charity or how much they spent on the bar mitzvah. It’s their money and I’m sure the other kids there had a great time.

  8. Sam_Handwich says

    OK…so a boy gets a little pubic hair and learns how to babble a few verses in Hebrew, and that’s license to objectify women for his own self-aggrandizing interests

    it’s really time to move beyond the patriarchal Bronze Age, dessert-dwelling BS

  9. Iban4yesu says

    A swallow does not the summer make! For one like this gesture, there have been hundreds of disgusting splurges and ostentatious displays of ”rubbing it in’ ‘…

  10. Caliban says

    I’m ideologically opposed to spending (likely) hundreds of thousands of dollars on some little putz’s (or putzette’s) birthday party, whether they’re 13, 16, 18, or any other age.

    The best I can say about is at least the dancers got some work out of it.

    And before you bring up the “charity,” show me the balance between the money that went for that “birthday party” and the money that actually went to charity, and which charities it went to.

  11. says

    Proving once again that jews have a lot of money. lol that’s what they know best . . . money, money, money. It is part of their religion. That’s why the parents are teaching this fat jewish boy early to spend it and flaunt it . Disgusting if you ask me.

  12. thrutch says

    Lets ignore the anti-semite. it comes down to this, the kid had a party, it looks like he had, it looks like he showed off some of his dancing skills. His friends looked like they had fun. Good for them.
    Some families have money and they chose to have a party. Not everything needs to be about Charity and how lavish this kid has it. The kid gets to go through the ritual of being a man in his religion just once, its the culmination of years of study and centuries of tradition. Why would you take that away or complain.

    We all have privilige, its what you do with it that matters.

  13. John says

    It’s a cute and amusing video, and some of these comments over-analyzing the “message behind it” are hilariously asinine. The cherry on the sundae.

  14. Robert says

    He is having fun and good for him.
    As for the money, spend all you want SAM.
    And for all the haters…SAM throwing a party for thousands of dollars and then giving thousands to charity…well sounds kinda like a white party doesn’t it.
    Just saying.

  15. TimD says

    I think the bigger issue may be why this was chosen to be on this website. Is the kid gay? I only clicked because I’ve never seen a Bar Bitzvah — so thought if this was the best, I’d look. I don’t need to see any more.

  16. ratbastard says

    That was embarrassing. But at least they pumped some money into the local economy and gave some cash to charity.

    And no Jerry, a very good friend of mine is a member of the tribe, and he’s an army vet and is a middle aged courier who lives in a modest home in a lower middle class neighborhood. A good neighbor of mine is a plumber and he is also Jewish. I mention this not because he doesn’t make good money, he makes d*mn good money, but he’s a plumber. Not all Jews are rich, and not all work in high finance, retail, sales, the entertainment industry, nor are they all doctors, lawyers, accountants, etc.,

  17. Markt says

    That was an excellent use of money. Really, I want to send a letter of thanks to him and his whole family. That was liberating and fun. I would have loved to have the opportunity to do that as a kid. And if I had. I think it would have made my life easier- and what I had to offer the world greater. I salute him, his family, and the culture that allows such events to happen. I wish that I had been raised in a similar fashion.

  18. Seriously? says

    For a group of people who don’t like to be judged, there sure is a lot of judging going on here. No one tells you how to spend you money, where do any of you get off telling others how they SHOULD spend theirs?

  19. FND says

    Come on guys. The kid is having fun. And the parents let him be a star on that stage, even if its only this one time. Dont rain on his parade. Just because we dont have the money he has, there’s no need to be Sour Sallies.

  20. MIke says

    I saw on Daily Mail that he did a number with the ladies on Good Morning America this morning. For a teen, he sure looks 8 years old.

  21. bob says

    To all on this site. Do not confuse the ceremony of becoming a Bar Mitzvah with the party that happened afterwards. Yes, it appears to be over the top — but it’s a party. This isn’t the ceremony of achieving Bar Mitzvah any more than a lavish reception and youtube footage of someone doing the chicken dance is a wedding.

  22. kevo says

    Confirmation was never like this. Slapped by a bishop? Dancing with showgirls? I am somehow missing the spirituality.

  23. Southern Belle says

    OK, for all of you judging judies who feel like this was a waste of money, blah, blah, blah… Have you ever spent money on yourself for a vacation, nice clothes/car/ house or even a fancy cup of coffee? Well, HOW DARE YOU! You should have given THAT money to charity.

  24. Chris says

    I think the point is, what is this child being taught? What are the expectations of this person going to be when he reaches adulthood? Spending all this money on oneself when an adult is fine, but to spend it on a child? Life isn’t one endless party.

    I have a relative that I love dearly. He is a recent college graduate. Earlier in life he was the golden child and every wish was catered to. In spite of this spoiling, he’s a good person. But he has fallen into depression, started using drugs. It’s like watching an episode of Intervention. And who can blame him? He wasn’t prepared for the harsh reality of adulthood, everything in the past was easy, and the future must look mighty bleak to him.

    I predict that this boy in the video will be in rehab by the age of 25. Much like my young cousin (I hope he will be soon – I don’t want to think about the alternative).

  25. JMC says

    It’s absolutely unbearable when people moan and complein about people who are well off financially using their money to bring themselves and their children enjoyment.

  26. AngelaChanning says

    Chris, we may not know what is causing your cousin to have these issues. I was the youngest in my family (several years apart from my siblings, and they treated me like a little prince. Fortunately, it only resulted in me being a picky eater. I hope your cousin gets the help he needs.

  27. Jack M says

    Mixed emotions on this. First, a lot of money was wasted on this. Second, I would have loved to be onstage dancing with them. It looked like a lot of fun.

  28. mickey says

    Shocked at some of the comments on a story about a families celebration and clear acceptance of their gay child.
    Extremely inappropriate antisemitic comments turned my stomach.

  29. hotbeef801 says

    First let me say that MarkT had it right and I love your comment.
    Next lavish parties happen all the time. I think these parents are fantastic for giving this boy the freedom to do that on stage in front of all his family and friends. I think it was great use of money if you have that kind of disposable income. I was afraid to dance at a dance at that age. Mazel its awesome.

  30. Vicente says

    “Coming Out Party”?!?! It’s so awkward to see a little boy making a stupid spectacle of himself on a “religious ceremony”.

  31. Jack says

    Wow, Little Kiwi is a raging anti Semite (and I don’t toss that word around lightly)…

    Raise your hand if you’re surprised!


  32. Sam says

    Great production, and the kid can dance! But really….could it be anymore self-absorbed? His parents are setting him up for a liftetime of disappointments.

  33. Derrick from Philly says


    thank you. There’s no way Kiwi would make that comment, but I of a few Towleroad “regulars” who would.

    My God, back in the 70’s I was so naive. I never knew there were Archie Bunker type homosexuals. I know now.

    They shouldn’t let everybody out of the closet.

  34. Jack says


    You mean the same Kiwi who shoots ad hominems at everyone who disagrees with him?

    It’s funny though, because he is notorious for posting under the names of people who disagree with him and say outrageous things to try to discredit them, so even if he is getting a taste of his own medicine, it is WELL deserved. Act like a child, and you can’t complain when someone does it to you…

    But I still think he wrote it. He’s got a lot of hate buried in there.

  35. Derrick from Philly says

    That should read “…but I KNOW of a few Towleroad “regulars” who would.”

    @ Jerry, DHR and Jack,

    to put it more politely–what the makes you think Little Kiwi would write some sh.t like that. Look to the regular bigot “regulars” on this blog if you want to know who wrote it.

  36. Jack says


    The fact that he insults and attacks anyone who dares disagree with what he things is a super “progressive” POV. He’s shown a lot of hate in how he deals with opposing points of view, so I can fully believe that he’s a Jew-hater. He hates anyone who doesn’t fit in with his view of how people should be, and that much he’s made obvious.

    Funny, I don’t see you defending other people when Kiwi hijacks their usernames and posts hateful and demeaning things… Oh, do you not believe he does that either?

  37. crispy says

    Every time someone accuses Little Kiwi of anti-semitism, Ratbastard grunts maniacally and sticks another finger up his hole.

  38. Derrick from Philly says

    @ “…and say outrageous things to try to discredit them,…”


    when you read Kiwi’s parodies of Rick how soon into the comment do you realize it is not the “real” Rick. Almost immediately, right? The parody is NOT meant to be believed. Kiwi makes outrageous comments meant to ridicule the cruelness of Rick’s views–outrageous explanations of how Rick got to be so mean and cruel.

    What the Kiwi imposter is doing is putting false words under the posting name of other blog “regulars”. And some regular visitors to this blog actually fall for it! LOL that’s what gets me–they actually fall for it.

    The other day some posters made some very thoughtful comments about how disappointed they were in Bernice King’s anti-Gay bigotry. They didn’t say anything offensive to Black folks–just how disappointed the were in her. Suddenly, I posted,

    “Y’all just hatin’ on her ’cause she’s black. Y’all racists!”

    Well, the “I” wasn’t me. Somebody (David Hearne/Rick) used my posting name. I thought it was hilarious because it was so silly. But some poor fools actually thought it was the real “Derrick from Philly”

    Honestly, can’t you Towleroadies tell some second rate drag performer trying to imitate Bette Davis?

  39. says

    the most wonderful thing about this video is that he was free to do it, and didn’t feel any shame. it’s wonderful that we’re finally getting to a place in our culture where kids can be the kids they are, and want to be.

    this moved me. and kudos to his wonderful family for nurturing and shepherding his joyful spirit.

    of course the anti-semitic post was not by me. this site has an obsessive coward with no balls who, since he can’t tell or show the truth about himself, chooses to lie about others.

    oh well. whatever a troll has to do to get through the daily grief of their sh***y lives is their crutch.

    trolls are sad. they’ve got nothing of worth in their own world, so they project their hate onto others.

    trust that a video that shows a family loving their happily-flamboyant kid will inspire bitter anger from some of those who never knew that joy.

  40. says

    @”Jack” – you can post in my name, and then make up excuses for why. won’t make my life worse. won’t make your life better.

    “opposing viewpoints?” meaning, what? to make your “point” you post, in my name, your views which are different from mine? different meaning: racist, anti-Semitic, transphobic, misogynistic, and full of pathetic internalized homophobia?

    yes. lovely, darling ūüėÄ

    how dare I, Kiwi The Intolerant, be so intolerant of the misogyny, transphobia, internalized homophobia, racism and anti-Semitism that this site’s pathetic anonymous trolls don’t have the balls to post from a place of visibility.

    you’re clearly a complete idiot, so nuance is lost on you. and it always will be. that’s ok. if i had your life i’d be driven insane, too.

    but you’re right; i have no patience for cowards and bigots. and i love how your cowardly bigoted @ss so so intellectually stunted that you’ve convinced yourself that not tolerating intolerant bigotry is a “difference of opinion”

    *elegant curtsy*

  41. Patrick says

    yes, that did cost a lot of money….and a lot of that money went to the people who were employed to make that happen- event tech, dancers, etc. They didn’t just light money on fire and it turn into glitter.

  42. Art Weiss says

    Listen, they needed to do something to give the guests a rest between the lobster and roast suckling pig courses.

  43. andrew says

    Why has TOWLEROAD allowed their Site to become an arena where Rick, and his aliases, and Little Kiwi, and his aliases, do battle by posting false and often very vulgar comments under each others names? The childish and often hateful postings are undermining the value of this site and making LGBT people look stupid in the process. TOWLEROAD, PLEASE TAKE RESPONSIBLE ACTION TO END THIS NONSENSE!!!

  44. Truthiness says

    meh. what ever happened to “here’s your card, now cut the cake?”

    it’s obscene wealth.


  45. Jerry6 says

    When I was a kid and had my “Confirmation” ceremony, I left School at 3:00 pm, and went to Church to mingle with the other kids until 4:00 pm when the Bishop and the Alter Boys came out to start the ceremony that ended with the Bishop slapping our faces. After which, we all left. When I got home, my Mother asked where I had been because I usually wasn’t that late. When I told her, she said “That’s nice”; Now wash your hands for Dinner; You Father will be home soon.

  46. Jerry6 says

    When I was a kid and had my “Confirmation” ceremony, I left School at 3:00 pm, and went to Church to mingle with the other kids until 4:00 pm when the Bishop and the Alter Boys came out to start the ceremony that ended with the Bishop slapping our faces. After which, we all left. When I got home, my Mother asked where I had been because I usually wasn’t that late. When I told her, she said “That’s nice”; Now wash your hands for Dinner; You Father will be home soon.

  47. Drew says

    The bigger issue is why in heaven did he not descend from the inside of the giant lamp shade instead if just standing behind it?

  48. EJC says

    Come on guys,

    This child (you are still at child as 13) can’t be gay, he has absolutely no rhythm! Supporting a cause is one think but why does one have to sit through this total lack of talent

  49. Daniel says

    The problem isn’t how much money they spent–that’s their business. It’s that the family is sending the message to their son and to all the kids in the audience (and Today show viewers, etc.) that this is what it means to come of age in their religion. Their son wanted attention, and they wanted attention, and only a narcissist would see this and think “good for him.”

  50. says

    there is the Bar Mitzvah – and there is the party after. Back in 1983 my best friend had his Bar Mitzvah… there was a solemn ceremony where he had do his readings. There was also a fun party after. Although there were no dance numbers, there was a speech with jokes.

    It was Sam’s day and that was OBVIOUSLY what he wanted. He rocked it. Go Sam.