Waitress and Former Marine Denied Tip Based On Her Gay ‘Lifestyle’

Dayna Morales, a waitress at Gallop Asian Bistro in Bridgewater, New Jersey got more, and less, than she bargained for when she served one woman and her family on Wednesday. The former Marine found both a note and a $0.00 tip on the check, and it was related to Morales's looks rather than her service. As soon as the family was seated, Morales reported, they noted her short haircut and seemed shocked by her appearance. 

NjwaitressHuffPost reports:

"Oh I thought you were gonna say your name is Dan," she allegedly said. "You sure surprised us!"

At the end of the meal, Morales was left with no tip on the $93.55 bill. Instead, she found a note on the receipt, reading: "I'm sorry but I cannot tip because I don't agree with your lifestyle & how you live your life."

Morales expressed her disgust over the incident in her email to Have A Gay Day. The email, later posted to the site's Facebook page, read:

I am THOROUGHLY offended mad pissed off and hurt that THIS is what her kids will grow up learning and that I served in the Marines to keep ignorant people like them free. Sorry lady but I don't agree with YOUR lifestyle and the way you're raising your kids but you didn't see me throwing that in your face and giving you shitty service. Keep your damn mouth shut and pray we never cross paths again.

There has been an outpouring of support from Facebook users assuring Morales that most heterosexual persons would be hard pressed to engage in such an action. However, as Huffington Post notes, there have been several incidents in the past months which would seem to suggest otherwise. A waiter at Carrabba's Italian Grill in Overland Park, Kansas received an extremely homophobic note last month, stating: "We hope you will see the tip your fag choices made you lose out on, and plan accordingly." Similar stories of denied service in business environments, including bed and breakfasts and eating establishments, have peppered the news in the past year.

Photo via Have A Gay Day's facebook page.


  1. CheapScienceFiction says

    “I’m sorry but I cannot tip because I don’t agree with your lifestyle & how you live your life.” – These excuses are pathetic. This is my response to these types of people;

    You cannot tip but you CAN take the service? You don’t mind being served by gays and having them handle your food. But when it comes time to close the circle and tip for good service, THEN you say, ‘Oh no, no.’
    Disgusting cheap bigots. If you disagree SO MUCH, then WALK BACK OUT THE DOOR and GO SOMEWHERE ELSE.
    Don’t STAY and then avoid tipping with stupid lame excuses.

  2. Steve says

    That wretch is just cheap and shallow. Her attitude about tipping is a perfect reflection of her value as a human being, a big fat Zero. How sad that children have to grow up associated with this pathetic excuse for a human. It would be kind of entertaining for her and the waitress to cross paths though…

  3. Talisman says

    I guess those so-called Christians don’t realize that part of that $94 went to pay the server a base salary.

    Not to mention that a small part also went to pay the salaries of all the other employees, some of whom are also likely gay, that work at the restaurant.

    No matter where you shop, where you dine out, whatever you do, there is going to be a gay person on the receiving end of the system you just put your money into.

    So, get over yourself and just let people live.

  4. Paul says

    You know – the gay community is very diverse and always techno savy. I’m wondering how long it is before someone finds out who it is that was there on 11/13 at 7:19 pm and decides to share it with the world. No doubt that just like cockroaches they scuttle away to hide when the light of day shines on them. Total trash!

  5. Paul R says

    The woman is just cheap. I bet she never tips more than 5-10% even for the most God-fearing servers.

    Why were they eating at an Asian bistro anyway? I don’t recall Asians being mentioned in the Good Book.

    And Francis, the restaurant has her credit card number and her name. Perhaps someone will “accidentally” reveal this monster to the world. My guess is that they were tourists from a small Southern town.

  6. Jason B. says

    These people always excuse their rediculous behavior on their objection to sinful acts and lifestyles per the definition of sin in by their good book. The most agregious and un-forgivable sin of all, the one that sends you directly to hell is refusal to accept Jesus in your life. With that said if they were truly just about persecuting sinners they would have nothing to do with Jews, Muslims, atheists etc.,

  7. Mary says

    I agree with Merv. I wondered about this story the last time I heard about a similar thing happening in another state. Possibly this was something made up to try to gain sympathy for the gays politically (which would be silly since they’re on a winning streak right now with SSM.) Overzealous people will sometimes do things like this. It’s no reflection on LGBT America if this turns out to be something that was staged.

    I suspected it was fake because you’d think that homophobic people wouldn’t want to be anywhere near gay people. Most people who are anti-gay politically would oppose this kind of direct rudeness to a gay person. Even in my worst days as a “homophobe” I would have been horrified at this. If I’d been there I would have gone over to the gay waiter and offered to give him the tip he missed out on, saying “I may not agree with you politically but no one deserves to be treated the way you were treated today.”

  8. Billy says

    I’m surprised she didn’t get fired. I don’t care what they wrote on the receipt, it seems wrong to post it online. Like a breach of trust. I’m no lawyer but the customer could find some way to sue because of this.

    Yes, I do think the customer is a scum bag.

  9. GregV says

    “…I would have gone over to the gay waiter…saying “I may not agree with you politically…”

    @Mary: Both you and this non-tipper must either come from VERY small villages where everybody lives around the block and knows everybody’s business or, more probably, have falsely presumed (at least in your more homophobic days) to already know another person’s life story if you have even a hint that he/she might be gay.
    I can’t recall the last time I knew anything about the lifestyle OR the politics of the staff serving me in a restaurant.

    In my opinion, the most overlooked problem in this story is the tipping culture itself. It has always made NO SENSE to me whatsoever that, while we pay a transit bus driver or a clothes salesman or a grocery store clerk exactly to the penny for our purchases, we are supposed to assume that the prices for restaurant food and taxi rides and haircuts is actually 15% more than the price we are quoted.
    In Australia and Japan and England, the server is paid for what he/she does and you pay the amount listed and no more. Nobody goes home having earned less than minimum wage on days when they served grumpy people.

  10. Mary says

    GregV, what I meant was that if I KNEW what had happened (meaning that someone told me about it) I’d have gone over to the waiter. Normally I don’t go around making assumptions about other people’s sexuality since it is none of my business anyway. And my “gaydar” is awful – the last time I was sure a person was gay (a co-worker) he ended up marrying a woman. Several people I know are now assuming that I’m bi or lesbian since I “have an awful lot of interest in this issue (LGBT rights and society.)” This last misconception strikes me as sort of fitting since I spend so much time on Towleroad that I almost feel like an honorary member of the LGBT community anyway!

  11. BigGuy says

    In New Jersey, the minimum wage for tipped employees is the federal minimum wage for tipped employees — $2.13 an hour. Employees are presumed to earn a minimum of the regular minimum wage from their tips. Deducted from their earned wages of $85.20 — the payroll and income taxes applied to $290 (40 X 7.25) — are deducted. Most waiters ans waitresses in NJ have take home paychecks each week of $15 or so; NEVER over $25.

    Republicans in Congress have proposed to help service personnel by completely eliminating the minimum wage and defining service personnel as independent contractors. Waiters would get 0 instead of $2.13 an hour. Also, since they would be independent contractors, instead of employees, they would be responsible for paying both the employer and employee FICA and Medicare payroll taxes; about $2.75 an hour, whether they received any tips or not.

  12. codyj says

    ask most any server WHATS the worst ‘crowd’ to wait on ? Most will reply ‘The SUNDAY” after church crowd (lunch),complete w/25c tips, relig tracts left under the plate instead of $$$,and their ‘better than thou’lofty attitude…

  13. JackFknTwist says

    Eh, whatever happened to ” Love the sinner…..” ?

    Eh, whatever happened to : “Judge not, so ye shall not be judged.” ?

    What a load of self appointed begrudging moralists.
    We need to know who these cheap miserly Scrooges are……if only to alert other restaurant owners and servers that the dregs of the earth are coming to dinner.

  14. Jack M says

    They had no problem sitting there while she served them food and drinks, but the problem came when it was time for a tip. Not only are they Christian hypocrites, they are cheap too.

  15. says

    People like this deserve to be exposed, have their faces plastered all over the internet. If you’re going to be that d@mn nasty then you SHOULD have to defend it publicly.

    Shove a microphone in her face and demand to know “What the %#@* were you thinking?!” In this instance I’m all for public shaming.

    Just imagine for a moment if someone wrote on a receipt, “The service was great but I notice you’re wearing a cross so I’m not going to give you a tip.” The screams of outrage would be deafening. Hell, they call it a war on their religion if someone says “Happy Holidays” instead of “Merry Christmas!”

    I really try not to think this way but things like this are why, when someone bring up their faith I assume they are a complete and utter tool.

    But I’m not anti-Christian, I’m just pro-lion. 😉

  16. Ted B. (Charging Rhino) says

    I’ve got some skepticism about this one. I-mean how would they know she’s a lesbian in the first-place? …And some people, myself included, prefer to pay the tip in-cash rather than putting it on the “card” in small eateries. That way the tip goes directly to the server.

  17. Ted B. (Charging Rhino) says

    I’ve got some skepticism about this one. I-mean how would they know she’s a lesbian in the first-place? …And some people, myself included, prefer to pay the tip in-cash rather than putting it on the “card” in small eateries. That way the tip goes directly to the server.

  18. Gay Guy says

    I hope that this story was properly vetted before it was printed. This story is very similar to a recent story that turned out to be a hoax.

    That is very unfortunate as this does still happen. While homophobia is still out there, manifestations that are this direct are becoming fairly rare (but they still happen).

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