Worried that a unifying gay culture will go the way of the dodo if everyone mainstreams, Brian Moylan at The Guardian offers ten "key experiences every gay man should experience to draw them together."
Here are numbers five and ten:
5. Protest: Get out there with a picket sign and some anger and fight for your rights. Even before Stonewall we have a long history of fighting the man, and that should never die. You can collect signatures for marriage equality or you can join an Occupy protest and fight income inequality, but never stop fighting. And if PDA (public displays of agitation) aren't your thing, there are plenty of causes that need fundraising, which can easily be done over brunch (a gay art that somehow is not on this list).
10. Come Out Of The Closet: In our age of Gay Straight Alliances in schools and celebrities who live in a perpetual glass closet without ever making a final announcement, coming out seems it's going out of style. "Why should gay people have to come when straight people don't?" While in some distant gaytopia that might come to pass but until then it's probably the only unifying experience every gay person has.
We all have a coming out story, whether it was when your mom says she knew already, your father stopped talking to you, or your boss just didn't care and told you to go back to your desk. No matter what else you may or may not have in common with another gay person, you can always fall back on this. It's like talking about the weather, but far more interesting, and often with more tears.
Moylan also suggests adopting a diva as your own. I suggest fictional "old lady" Gemma Teller Morrow.