Fashion Men | Film and TV | Ian Thorpe | Jake Gyllenhaal | Matt Damon | Sports

It's All About the Uniform

Mattdamonthedeparted

Mattdamonrugby_1Just Jared spent his weekend digging up some recent photos of our favorite male celebs on the job and off, some of which may set your heart aflutter early this Monday morning. First off, here's Matt Damon, sharp and tidy in a police uniform on the set of his new Martin Scorcese film The Departed.

Matt dons several kinds of butch drag in this film, including some filthy rugby attire.

I'm not exactly sure which Matt to gawk at first but there's no doubt these shots demonstrate the power of a uniform. No flesh necessary here. Arrest me...please!

And then there's Jake Gyllenhaal in jock drag, only this time it's not for a movie, he's just relaxing on the baseball diamond, but he's working the accessories like a pro.

Jakegyllenhaalbaseball Jakegyllenhaalbaseball2

Finally, Australian swimmer Ian Thorpe, aka the Thorpedo, does nothing to ease the gay rumors and proves he's a true International Male when he steps out in this get-up, complete with black nail polish, his cloth belt buckled off-center, a few days worth of stubble, and a flash of that furry tummy.

Ianthorpegayvague_1

I think he's probably on the phone with either the Chess King Crisis Hotline or the center for Gay Vague studies. Fortunately, I still wouldn't mind if he swam over into my lane.

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Comments

  1. Damn... I am just loving all this Monday fashion update, but I am going to have to stick with Ian because of the exposed midriff.

    Posted by: senhor Made In Brazil | Aug 8, 2005 9:35:36 AM


  2. Ian looks like a big girl in this photo. He needs to hit the treadmill because he seems to have put on weight. Or his clothes are way to small for him.

    Posted by: gabe | Aug 8, 2005 9:51:40 AM


  3. Ian seems fine, but black nail polish almost always looks odd in broad daylight.

    Posted by: sek | Aug 8, 2005 9:54:11 AM


  4. Did he get his penis and balls cut off or something? Those are girl jeans and I think I see a vagina. There's no way a normal sized penis and balls can fit into that tiny little crotch area.

    Posted by: Sean | Aug 8, 2005 10:03:08 AM


  5. Um, Ian seems to have lost his sausage and replaced it with a taco! Those are women's jeans, and that shirt is easily 5 sizes too small...he's just a big girl at heart ;)

    But bring on Jake anytime! WOOF!

    Posted by: Wayne | Aug 8, 2005 10:07:49 AM


  6. Love the pics of Ian! Great! I knew he was on the pink team!

    Posted by: Roy | Aug 8, 2005 10:56:16 AM


  7. chess king.....no you didn't....

    Posted by: nate | Aug 8, 2005 11:04:26 AM


  8. Matt: though attractive, i'll say this again--he'll never be able to pull off Lance Armstrong

    Jake: i have no idea what people see in this guy

    Ian: dude, c'mon...what a great laugh

    Posted by: CriticalRN | Aug 8, 2005 11:06:11 AM


  9. Ian looks a bit too feminine here for me. Jake on the other hand doesn't. It's pics like that that make me look forward to Brokeback Mountain.

    Posted by: DutchECK | Aug 8, 2005 11:13:05 AM


  10. Wow...as this pic clearly shows, Ian Thorpe is growing boobs and traded his dick for a vagina now. Who knew?

    Posted by: Sean | Aug 8, 2005 11:15:31 AM


  11. Didn't I just see Ian at the circus working as the bearded lady? Cute blouse.

    Posted by: Mothanial | Aug 8, 2005 11:40:51 AM


  12. why is everyone picking on Ian Thorpe? isn't it just another barely disguised form of homophobia? of laughing at the 'sissy' boy?

    Posted by: max | Aug 8, 2005 11:49:06 AM


  13. Damn those are some tight jeans and black fingernails always looks dirty to me, but otherwise he looks hot.

    Posted by: Michael | Aug 8, 2005 11:53:19 AM


  14. In my case it's just the fashion Max. Despite the wardrobe, I think he's pretty smokin hot.

    Posted by: andy | Aug 8, 2005 11:56:15 AM


  15. Ian's hot, I don't think anyone on here is doubting that. But what's with the clothes and where's the package? There's gay and then there's ~gay~.

    Posted by: Mothanial | Aug 8, 2005 12:16:05 PM


  16. Matt can cuff me and drag me off anytime.

    Posted by: Sue | Aug 8, 2005 6:15:48 PM


  17. Ian is not the only Australian metrosexual to wear nailpolish, eg, comedian Wil Anderson. As to the crotch, I have photos of Ian that show that this photo is an optical illusion.

    Posted by: John Bishop | Aug 8, 2005 7:00:05 PM


  18. Younger Australian men regularly wear nailpolish. My 16 year old brother and his mates, for example, think it is cool to wear nailpolish.

    Posted by: Victor Victoria | Aug 9, 2005 1:01:34 AM


  19. I'm sorry...it's all good!

    Posted by: tommy | Aug 9, 2005 9:27:15 AM


  20. Melbourne Men look like that! You see what I have to DEAL with?!?!?!?

    Posted by: Aussie Girl | Aug 9, 2005 6:41:57 PM


  21. Ian's crotch doesn't live up to his shoe size(52).... BOO. I kinda hoped he'd have a third leg.. sigh.

    Posted by: Dissapointed fan | Aug 9, 2005 11:54:23 PM


  22. damn, those are some tight jeans...probably used to wearing that tight, sex-ay swimming suit all the time, so the jeans are a substitute...he's still smokin' hotttt

    Posted by: cassie | Aug 11, 2005 10:43:23 PM


  23. Perhaps this picture of Mr Thorpe bears out the words of Australian punk rocker turned jazz crooner Ignatius Jones. "Clothes . . . are clothes. ... Fashion is a Mistake." (Ignatius Jones. True hip: instant style for the modern desperado (McPhee Gribble: 1990, p.29)

    But as I loathe obligatory uniformity and conformity in clothing, I say that a certain much respected spunky Australian sportsman ought be able to enjoy wearing (or not wearing) what he pleases, black finger nails and all, without silly conclusions being drawn as to his sexuality, his fashion sense, taste or any other such rubbish.

    As Iggy Jones says (p.107) "[O]ne of the most fundamental rules of Hip is that: Public Opinion Is Vulgar; Conventional Wisdom Is A Contradiction In Terms -- You Have Better Things To Do. . . . Public Opinion, or Herd Mentality, sucks for One Big Reason: it is a substitute for thinking. All that the Pseudo-Hip have done is replace the mentality of the Large Herd with that of a smaller, much groovier get-down far-out Herd. They are still Lemmings."

    That's where Mr Thorpe wins out; he thinks (though perhaps not when he chose these clothes) and says and does interesting things.

    Posted by: brian | Aug 12, 2005 6:37:00 PM


  24. Why should he give a shit what you think of his clothes and why should I give a shit about your criticism of what he wears. Who are you people. Better yet what are you people.

    He's living his life... you people on the other hand .... need to get a life.

    Posted by: PhuqU | Jan 29, 2006 4:07:49 AM


  25. I think he's Hot... no matter what he wears...

    Posted by: Ethan | Jul 17, 2006 12:52:32 PM


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