Brad Pitt to Marry Angelina…Where Everyone Can Marry

BrangelinaAfter reading the latest rumblings that Brad Pitt is to marry Angelina Jolie in a fairytale Christmas wedding in South Africa, I thought back to Pitt’s statement to Esquire magazine in September.

In an article titled “Fifteen Things I Think Everyone Should Know,” Pitt told the magazine: “Angie and I will consider tying the knot when everyone else in the country who wants to be married is legally able.”

Of course everyone assumed that “the country” meant Pitt’s own—America—which would mean Brangelina might be waiting a very long time to tie the knot.

However, as South Africa has recently legalized same-sex unions, Brangelina wouldn’t have to worry about breaking that fairly major promise if they marry there.

Pretty sneaky, Pitt.

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Brad Pitt Will March Down the Aisle When the Gays Can [tr]
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  1. Rob (lrdarystar) says

    Hmph, but I won’t blame them for wanting to marry. Just let’s see if they actually hold to their nuptials and don’t break up like almost every other celebrity marriage nowadays. How sacred is marriage now anyway?

    So, I guess George Clooney will be the best man. Hopefully Brad will be on the View the day after the Bachelor Party…

  2. rock says

    I am not saying anything about Pitt but Angie is more of a man then he could ever be. The woman has a mind of her own which is more then I can say for a lot of men, esp. in H/Wood. Angie does whatever she wants to, and now she wants to be married.
    I like her a lot but I think she could do better.

  3. jimmyboyo says

    Cool way to stay true to the earlier statement and yet still get married since Angelina’s vagina is that GOOD!!!! :-) She most definetly could tempt me to pretend to be straight for 1 night, after a few beers. Then again, she has always been dogged by that old rumor of her being born a hermaphrodite…so would I be playing straight for 1 night? Hmmmmmm

  4. burnssuit says

    I personally don’t expect anyone to hold off until gay marriage is legalized. HOWEVER, knowing that this pair will exercise their right to enter into sanctimonious heterosexual marriage AND within two years exercise their right to enter into sanctimonious heterosexual divorce, I’m reserving my right to be a little pissed. It’ll be a ridiculously high profile and exceedingly expensive wedding, a celebration of mutual infatuation and another example of why marriage is nothing sacred for most.

  5. Astro says

    I’ll admit that I am a huge Brangelina fan and find them endlessly facsinating. But I would hold off passing judgement on the health of their relationship since I could probably guess accurately that most of us have a hard time making a relationship work.
    And honestly Burnssuit, aren’t most relationships, gay or straight, a matter of “mutual infatuation?”

    It’s not helpful for us to attack straights for their abuse of marriage, especially celebrities, because if given the right, we would frankly abuse it as well.

    I would like to say I would marry my prince charming and stay married forever. But come on! I and most of you would probably get divorced. It’s the harsh reality of life, especially if you’re a gay urban professional.

    I know you’re responding to the conservative claim that they’re attempting to save the institution of marriage, but let’s attack these conservative pundits and politicians for their hypocrisy, and not these vapid celebrities.

  6. Zeke says

    Before everyone jumps on these two for hedging on their pledge, let me say something in their defense. Though I do think this is a bit of a hedge I think they are still making a very important statement to America about marriage equality.

    My best friend, who I met in Basic Training more than a few years ago, and his (second) fiancée made a pledge to me that they would get married the day that I and my partner were able to get married in this country. Although I was deeply touched by the gesture I didn’t want them to deny themselves their happiness just because our country was unjust to me and my partner. My friend, who is THE toughest Marine I’ve EVER known, looked me in the eyes and simply said, “Semper Fi” and for almost five years they kept that promise to us. I can’t talk about it without crying like a baby. My husband always says it’s a good thing my friend was straight or I would have been married to HIM today. He’s probably right but I wouldn’t change a thing now that I’m stuck with the ole fart.

    To make a very long story less long, when Ontario began performing legal marriages and my partner and I realized that we actually could get married SOMEwhere we started considering moving to Canada and becoming Canadian citizens (we’re still considering it). We talked to our friends and asked them what they thought of getting hitched in Canada in a double ceremony with us. My friend, every the ethical technician, was concerned that that would mean breaking his promise. I agreed that it would technically be a breach but I told him it wasn’t important to us because they had already sacrificed more years than we would have ever asked of them. We came up with a compromise that allowed him to keep his promise and marry even though it wasn’t legal in THIS country. He and his fiancée would get married in Toronto with us and they would tell everyone they knew WHY they got married in Canada.

    That’s exactly what happened and to this day when ever my big, tough Marine friend or his wife talks about their marriage, no matter where they are or who they’re talking to, they tell people that they got married in Canada in a double ceremony with his best friend because it was the only place where his friend and his fiancé COULD get married because they are gay.

    Though their marriage is legal in this country and ours is not, which still bothers them greatly, the statement they made was extremely important to them and was so unbelievably touching and to my husband and me.

    They have probably opened up the dialog of marriage equality as much as my husband and I have, even though they wouldn’t seem to have a pony in this race. I think Brad and Angelina have attempted to do that as well and I applaud them for that. That is what I think will ultimately change this country’s attitudes concerning issues of gay and lesbian equality and fairness. When our friends and family members start taking anti-gay laws and prejudices personally and fighting as if THEIR OWN lives were at stake, THEN we’ll see exponential progress made.

    Before you get the idea that my friend is a Saint, let me point out that this is the SAME damned friend who started calling me “Anita Spleen” in the hospital and had all the nurses (at a Baptist Hospital) calling me Anita before it was over with! The lesson being: Even straight Saints can be real, raging bitches at times!

    Congratulations, good luck and thank you to Brad and Angelina.

  7. mark m says

    Hey Zeke, thanks for sharing that. “Semper Fi”… that almost brought a tear to my eye and I’m not even a Marine. Band of Brothers truly.

    And Jimmyboyo and Rock… couldn’t agree more about Angelina. A lot of people thinnk she’s a freak (and rightly so) but she has managed to avoid the cliche names of “Bitch” or “Whore” thrown at most women in Hollywood who are unapologetic about their sexuality or their assertiveness.

    And it wouldn’t even take alcohol for her to seduce me. :)

  8. Burnssuit says

    I’m not attacking “straights” for their abuse of marriage – I’m attacking abusers of marriage for their abuse of marriage. What evidence is there that this marriage is any more stable than all the other celebrity marriage that have failed?
    When you have a glamorous lifestyle followed by the world’s press and mass quantities of wealth, you can afford to buy and sell matrimony without consequence, and becoming divorced only means more press time.
    Yes, most relationships do consist of mutual infatuation. Is that healthy? Of course not. Should we celebrate this particular case of infatuation just because it involves two attractive, wealthy, famous people? I don’t think so. People who abuse marriage make me a little upset, and this pair will probably join those ranks soon.

  9. jimmyboyo says


    “ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh” Nothing else covers your story but a sweet smiley :-) “ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh”

    Mark M :-) I love Angelina’s looks, but most of all I respect and adore her drive for humanitarian causes. Oh, and supposedly she realy is humble and truly nice. One particular fan post that I read once sums her up. Late in the morning (3-4:00 a.m.) coming home from the airport from a stint in DC talking to congress, angie instead of going straight into her home crossed the street to a car where 2 fans had camped out and spent an hour with them chatting and taking pictures. How many celebs of her calibar would do such?

  10. Dex says

    Zeke, that’s a heart touching story if I ever heard one. Thanks for sharing :-)

    And 9 out of 10 men (straight, gay, bi, and everything in between) agree, Angie AND Brad are certified hitable.

  11. Pandora says


    Thank you for sharing your story.

    We here in Canada would welcome you with
    open arms if you and husband decide to

    Since you did get married here – then I
    proclaim you both “honoury citizens”!

    Have a great weekend!


  12. mark m says


    I agree about Jolie’s humanitarian work. She is smart enough to know how to put her celebrity to good use.

    And Daniel, yes she’s 100% woman but I think what she projects is an almost masculine charisma, without being masculine. It’s hard to articulate. She has all the best strengths of both sexes: compassion, strength, confidence and she projects all of this in a way we normally associate with powerful men.

    I don’t usually gush about movie stars but she had me at hello.

  13. steve says

    I’m sorry but i don’t agree with you Rock

    You imply that Brad doesn’t have a mind of his own. How can you say that, when he fell in love with Angelina then left his wife, despite them being Hollywood royalty.

    Then he is man enough to step up and love her children as his own and make a commitment to them by adopting them.

    They all make a beautiful family and I would certainly believe that Angelina thanked her lucky stars that man like Brad came into her life and gave her the sense that she now has that large, strong and grounded family that she has wanted for many years. So therefore there can be no one ‘better’ for her.

    As you said, she is very strong minded and goes for what she wants…and guess what…she’s done that. She wants Brad and will keep him.

  14. Zeke says

    Thanks Pandora, it could very well happen. If it were just me and the husband we would have migrated north years ago.

    We are still seriously considering it because it doesn’t look like our family will ever be recognized and respected in this state or in this country.

    I had a very serious brush with death recently. Many people here are aware of the ordeal I went through but not too many people know how psychologically devastating it was to my husband. It served as a terrifying reality check as to just how vulnerable our family is in the state and country we call home. We came very close to realizing our worst nightmare.

    I have many Canadian friends so I know I would fit right in there, et je parle déjà français aussi, in case Quebec is more our style.

    The climate change from Florida to Canada might be a problem. Not to mention, there seems to be something terribly unnatural about someone migrating FROM Florida TO Canada. We’d feel like salmon swimming up stream!

    Sorry. Didn’t mean to hijack the thread.

  15. joojoobee says

    I guess “Brangelina” forgot that there are three or four other countries where same sex marriages have been legal for some time, not to mention the cities and regions elsewhere. Or maybe it’s just the idiot celebrity “reporter” behind the “story” whose attention span ends sometime last month, and would have to consult back issues of People.

    I hate celebrity worship.

  16. RB says

    Great story Zeke! I truly enjoy reading you posts as they are always uplifting!

    I am a fan of Angelina; totally hot. However, their treatment of marriage is a problem for me. Does anyone remember Jennifer Anniston? She was however, the original wife before Brad wandered! It is a problem with me to watch marriage be so portable.

    Yes, I was married to a woman and took my vows very seriously. I tried for 11 years to be faithful but my reality of being gay was too much! I understood till death do we part and tried very hard to uphold the promise I made! I do not see that in celebs and especially in this couple. I view them as simply being married “again”.

    If I could go back 20 years and marry my partner from the beginning I would get marriage and “until death do we part”. I cannot do that and do not have regrets as I cannot change my situation. All I am saying is that marriage is important. It is something that many people do not get. To have the opportunity to marry the man I love and have it legal would mean more to me today than many would understand. Ironically, it was over this very discussion, marriage, that Zeke and I became friends. He blasted me, but it was all good in the end.

    Through our conversations I came to understand gay marriage and how important it was to me! Zeke, I love you my brother! You are among the few, truly enlightened individuals that I admire the most and I appreciate you friendship!!!

  17. RB says

    One final thought before I get labeled as pious. Marriage equality was NOT an issue when both were married the first time, so why then is it important now? Sorry guys, it just smacks of publicity stunt to me! I lost all respect for Brad after he left Jennifer they way he did, walking all over his vows to the “next” Hollywood wife. How can we even think they understand and/or honor the state of marriage? It is simply another relationship that they are free to move through and we are not!

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