01/30/2007
ESPN Honors the Life of Anthony Castro
A death that may hit closer to home for many is given some attention from ESPN, as they recall the life of Anthony Castro. I mentioned his death briefly last week, but I'm bringing it up again because it's nice to see a major sports outlet giving some ink to a deserving soul.
Castro died last week when the driver of the truck he was in crashed down a ravine in the mountains of Southern California. Here's the Outsports post if you missed it. This is from the ESPN piece:
"I never had the pleasure of meeting Anthony, but when I read about his story, tears filled my eyes -- in large part because he died so young, but also because he lived so courageously. You see Michael Anthony Castro, the three-sport star athlete and most popular kid in school, was openly gay. Came out when he was a sophomore.'He caught a lot of crap over the first six to nine months after coming out,' says Phil Takacs, a Banning High counselor. "Sometimes he would come to my office and ask if he could just spend the rest of the day there. He would say that he couldn't take being called 'faggot' any more today and just needed a break. He even thought about quitting sports. But over time, Anthony just got tired of the other kids making him feel bad for who he was.
One day he was in practice and one of the other wrestlers was giving him a bunch of crap about being gay. Anthony looked at the kid and said 'You have a problem with me; why don't we take this to the mat?' This guy wrestled in the heaviest division, but Anthony pinned him in less than 30 seconds. That guy never said anything else again.'"
Every high school should have such an individual. May Anthony rest in peace.
The brilliant life of Anthony Castro [espn]
Sphere: Related ContentPosted 2:40 PM EST by Andy in Education, News, Sports | Permalink
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I'm glad to see that ESPN has picked up this story. Apparently, the kid had heart. It makes me very sad to know he died in such a stupid, senseless way.
Posted by: peterparker | Jan 30, 2007 2:51:23 PM
This kid more in his 19 years than most people will do in a lifetime. Tragic but it's great he's getting the recognition he deserves.
Posted by: Giovanni | Jan 30, 2007 3:03:54 PM
This guy was a wonderful young man. He had some guts to come out in high school. Its so sad his life ended so early.
Posted by: BEN | Jan 30, 2007 3:10:15 PM
I'm so happy Anthony Castro continued in athletics after coming out. He is an inspiration to ALL people. It's good to know he didn't let being gay define him as a person. Anthony's story needs to be heard by everyone who enjoys and participates in athletics.
Posted by: Mike | Jan 30, 2007 3:22:49 PM
Truly a great tragedy. He was a brave, courageous, and brilliant young man, with a large soul. May he rest in peace
Posted by: Alex | Jan 30, 2007 3:23:48 PM
Maybe some good will come out of this senseless tragedy, especially with ESPN covering the story. He should be an inspiration to anyone - young or old - who are athletes and still in the closet. I wish I had role models like Anthony when I was 19.
Posted by: mark m | Jan 30, 2007 3:24:47 PM
God bless you, Anthony. Rest in peace.
Posted by: dattexas | Jan 30, 2007 3:25:31 PM
WOW that is so tragic. He is such an inspiration to so many closeted teens. He was quite handsome too...so so sad. Hopefully they can turn his life into a movie on Lifetime or something. I'll pray for him tonight.
Posted by: Ed | Jan 30, 2007 3:26:09 PM
A SI article would be nice too.
Posted by: Anon | Jan 30, 2007 3:35:50 PM
I'm confused, the article about his death says:
"After graduation, Anthony attended Riverside Community College and moved in with his boyfriend, Cody Mariscal, who had graduated from Banning four years earlier and competed on the football, swim and track teams there.
"I was too scared to come out when I was in high school," says Mariscal, who was driving the truck in the accident."
His boyfriend was driving the truck that plummeted 120 feet down a ravine and he lived?
Posted by: Tim | Jan 30, 2007 3:36:30 PM
What a truly terrible thing that someone with so much talent and courage is lost to us. Someone like this guy is so desperately needed in a mob-mentality environment where bullying, cowardice and intolerance are the order of the day..
Posted by: Atheist | Jan 30, 2007 3:50:59 PM
Anyone who mocked the long-overdue storm over the words and actions of Isaiah Washington should reread:
"Sometimes he would come to my office and ask if he could just spend the rest of the day there. He would say that he couldn't take being called 'faggot' any more today and just needed a break."
He was remarkable, but I can't say that of those who feel the need to mention that "he was quite handsome, too." We all "sing the body electric," but his death is no greater a tragedy because of his looks.
Posted by: Leland | Jan 30, 2007 3:53:34 PM
Andy, thank you for posting about this and spreading the word about Anthony. He was a great guy and someone I wish we had written about sooner. We played on the same team at the Gay Games and I actually learned something from this kid, 15 years my junior.
Yes, Cody, Anthony's boyfriend, was driving the jeep. He walked away unscathed and, unfortunately, has been charged with vehicular manslaughter. Cody is beside himself with grief and now must deal with legal charges. So sad.
Posted by: Cyd | Jan 30, 2007 3:58:22 PM
If only the world had more people like Anthony think how much better it would be. His death is all the more tragic due to his uncommon courage. I wish that I had such a role model when I was that young.
Posted by: Will | Jan 30, 2007 4:04:22 PM
I was thinking of my own life ...I was such a fucking wimp in school....and of course some kids took advantage especially in High School....so when he "took him to the mat"....was something that I would have wanted to know how to do....every gay kid needs to know how to protect themselves with just some martial arts etc......
I always wonder if we would have ever heard of him unless he died..so maybe this was the reason for his untimely death..but Anthony will NOW be always remembered & honored for his bravery in life
Posted by: tc | Jan 30, 2007 4:05:22 PM
Cyd,
I read an article that said Cody may have been drinking, has this been disproved?
Posted by: Mike | Jan 30, 2007 4:32:32 PM
^ Not to add fuel to the fire, but it is true that intoxicated drivers often walk away from wrecks with little or no injury because their bodies do not tense up during the crash. It might explain why the driver in this instance survived and his passenger did not.
Posted by: Mark M | Jan 30, 2007 4:50:58 PM
Anthony's short life was a challenge to many people’s pre-conceived notions about what it means to be a gay man, and more importantly, what it means to be a gay youth in America today. He was also a tremendous inspiration to more people than he could have possibly imagined.
I have to say that I'm troubled by the nonchalant way that the high school “counselor” reminisces about how Anthony would stop by his office seeking refuge from being called “faggot” all day. I would like to know what the counselor did about the abuse this kid was facing incessantly on a daily basis. At what point, if ever, did this counselor confront the administration, teachers, staff and students of this school about stopping the blatant homophobia and bullying that this kid, and I’m sure many others, endured?
I’m sure Stephen will be here soon to tell us all about how “faggot” is only a word and how these kids should just develop thicker skins and then give us yet another lesson on how verbally assaulting gay kids is, or should be, a protected freedom of speech. However, in my opinion, this is exactly why “No Name Calling Day” and “Stop Bullying” programs are necessary and this is exactly why these programs MUST include discussions about homophobia. There are a lot of Anthonys out there who never make it out of high school to accomplish the many wonderful things that this wonderful young man did. There are many gay kids in high school who don’t have the courage, strength and endurance to survive the abuse that Anthony did. Many of these kids drop out of school to escape the abuse that the teachers and administrators ignore. They all too often end up on the streets with no future. Tragically, many others commit suicide rather than face the lifetime of abuse that they fear will come from churches, the government, co-workers (like Isaiah Washington), friends, family, total strangers and multi-million dollar homophobic organizations like the AFA and Focus on the Family.
Anthony’s story is, at the same time, happy and sad, triumphant and tragic, hopeful and despairing; a story of overcoming overwhelming odds and of rolling the ultimate “snake-eyes”. Hopefully gay kids will be inspired by his strength; closeted people will be inspired by his courage; principals, teachers, counselors, bosses, sports stars, actors, producers, preachers and others will be struck by his testimony and awakened to the hurt inflicted by words like “faggot” and "queer"; and everyone will be touched by a beautiful and promising life cut far too short.
He may have only been 19 years old, but in my opinion Anthony Castro was a true gay hero that could teach us all a lot about the importance of living our lives as strong, courageous, out and proud gay men.
Namasté and Rest in Peace Anthony. You will be missed. You will be remembered.
Posted by: Zeke | Jan 30, 2007 5:07:37 PM
Zeke, you are so off-base. That guidance counselor you attack took Anthony into his home when his mom kicked him out and helped raise him. So before you disparage this incredible man and put quotes around "counselor," you should ask questions first.
Posted by: Cyd | Jan 30, 2007 5:13:43 PM
Because the deadline for voting is approaching, I take this opportunity, which I'm sure Anthony Castro would appreciate, to remind people to please vote for Judy Shepard in the Volvo Hero Awards competition which could win the Matthew Shepard Foundation a much-needed $50,000. She's tirelessly fought for kids like Anthony and her murdered son since his own death nine years ago.
Please go to the address below right now and enter SHEPARD in the "Find Your Hero" search box at the top of the page and follow the subsequent directions.
http://www.volvoforlifeawards.com/cgi-bin/iowa/english/home/index.html
The deadline is February 4th. Thank you.
And, thank you, Zeke; eloquent and true as always.
Posted by: Leland | Jan 30, 2007 5:19:39 PM
Let this tragic death bring us to the realization that, as we this post, thousands of young women and men - athletes and non-athletes alike, continue to shoulder the hatred of many. Whether it is the boy who can't throw a ball, the girl who can throw it farther than any boy in her class, whether he is that kid that ''switches' down the hall, or the girl who sometime gets mistaken for a boy - it is up to us adults, gay or straight, to make our voices and presence heard. Speak up - stand up - and let our children be happy for who they are.
Posted by: Ed | Jan 30, 2007 5:29:59 PM
It's just not right that somebody with so much potential, to do so much good in the world, had to leave it so soon. Well, he's with God now, where he should be. I'm trying really hard not to chew out his boyfriend...in my mind of course.
Posted by: FanGirlHater | Jan 30, 2007 5:44:34 PM
I'm sure Cody feels terrible about his actions. The drinking and driving only makes the whole incident a bigger lesson for us all.
Don't judge to harsh.
Posted by: Mrs. Laura "Pickles" Bush | Jan 30, 2007 5:48:46 PM
Right on, Ed. We're all in this together.
We'd do well to remember that more often.
Posted by: Brian | Jan 30, 2007 5:51:43 PM
Just a couple of thoughts...
Maybe the boyfriend was wearing a seat belt.
Do you think that this kid's death would be receiving all this attention if he wasn't a good-looking jock? What if, all other things being equal, he hadn't been into sports but instead enjoyed wearing dresses and belting out showtunes? Probably no one would have cared or noticed if he had died.
The whole thing reminds me of accounts I've read about discrimination within the african american community against darker-skinned blacks.
As a gay man, can you claim to be free of internalized homophobia when you so transparently celebrate the very standards used by the majority to oppress your community?
Posted by: Chris | Jan 30, 2007 6:42:27 PM
Cyd, with all due respect, "asking questions" is exactly what I was doing, though I did it in an inappropriately accusatory way.
I will certainly admit that I didn't give Mr. Takacs the benefit of the doubt and the "counselor" quotes were inappropriate, but experience, countless stories about kids being left to face bullying alone by teachers and counselors, and the counselor's own words lead me to incorrect assumptions about what was done in response to the bullying. Sadly Mr. Takacs’ response to Anthony’s plight is all too often the exception rather than the rule.
I apologize for my errant assumptions about this counselor. I realize how important it is to not make assumptions, regardless of individual experiences and testimonies. I know it’s wrong to make assumptions and I usually do my best to avoid making them.
I salute Mr. Takacs for being there to support Anthony when he needed it most. I’m sorry for demeaning him and his work.
I’m also sorry that I offended you Cyd.
Hopefully my greater points won't be lost in the fact that I made an inappropriate assumption and insinuation.
Posted by: Zeke | Jan 30, 2007 6:43:42 PM
Leland,
Ugly is rampant... The loss of an attractive man is a greater loss.
Posted by: M | Jan 30, 2007 7:23:41 PM
Hey Chris, very true. Sadly, I doubt he'd be getting all this attention if he were african american as well.
Hey M, shallow, much?
Posted by: FanGirlHater | Jan 30, 2007 7:29:12 PM
And I apologize, Zeke, for attacking you. I had just gotten off the phone with a friend who was at the funeral. Because the family (who rejected Anthony) organized the funeral, Cody and Phil (the guidance counselor, with whom he lived for the last couple of years) were mentioned maybe one time. Anthony's sexuality was virtually ignored. And when Cody got up to speak, a family member walked out. They were shunned by much of the family.
So, I was just really sensitive about it in the moment I posted.
Just know that Phil took care of Anthony like he was his son.
Posted by: Cyd | Jan 30, 2007 7:29:22 PM
Cyd, were they shunned for their homosexuality or because they think Cody killed Anthony because he was drunk? Either way I don't think they are in a position to shun anybody. They turned their backs on Anthony long ago.
Posted by: Curious | Jan 30, 2007 7:33:47 PM
Well, if the bf caused the wreck, it would be understandable if the family were a tad mad at him, no?
He is being lauded, not for being a jock, but for breaking down barriers and reaching out to others, which is a bit harder than wearing a dress.
This story should not be nitpicked to death like everything else on TR. It's a painful tragedy basically.
I used to hit home runs and pin jocks in gym class too, but I wasn't out. I was fighting for geeks everywhere! Oh, were they ever mad!
Posted by: Anon | Jan 30, 2007 7:44:13 PM
Zeke,
While I think it's great that a person took Anthony into his home when his parents abandoned him, I'm a little confused about the fact that, in this case, it was his high school counselor. In California, most high school counselors would be school psychologists or marriage family therapists (or interns)...those professions bar you from having anything other than a professional relationship with a client...as Anthony would have been if he saw the counselor at his school. Furthermore, anything a client says in the context of a therapy session (such as 'can i hand out here because I just can't deal with being called faggot any more today?') is confidential and cannot be disclosed to others, even after the death of the client. In any case, maybe this young man's counselor broke the rules and maybe that was, in his case, for the best. I'm just troubled that a counselor would disclose something a client said that should have remained confidential.
And to answer someone else's question, I read somewhere that the driver and all passengers except Anthony were thrown from the vehicle...I don't think any of them were wearing their seatbelts.
Posted by: peterparker | Jan 30, 2007 7:56:24 PM
FanGirlHater,
African Americans killing each other is not news. Gangsters, Atheletes, Rappers... same ol' same ol'.
Posted by: M | Jan 30, 2007 8:32:45 PM
Good guy die young. The Lord is love him so much so He called him home to the place where the people are not judging with each other because of the race, sexuality, and religion. May God bless you Anthony...Rest in peace...
Posted by: Dema | Jan 30, 2007 8:51:46 PM
What a beautifully worded tribute..made me bawl my eyes out.
Thanks for sharing it Andy. And thanks to LZ Granderson for honoring Anthony's memory in such a profound way!
Posted by: Da | Jan 30, 2007 8:58:26 PM
Chris,
You raise a valid point. I disagree with your assertion, however, that the lauding is a result of internalized homophobia. Our culture is not short on representations of the feminine side of being a man. I think effeminate men are wonderful and brave for being themselves, but often they simply can't be anything else.
Masculine gay men can pass for straight and many choose to remain closeted for that reason. I applaud any young man who chooses HONESTY over this other path. I chose to hide for much of my life and I regret that decision. I wish I had the character at that age to come out.
So before you judge others here for finding inspiration in a kid who didn't take the easy path of hiding, just consider that there are many kinds of gay men and Anthony shows us and the rest of the world that this is true.
Posted by: mark m | Jan 30, 2007 9:14:11 PM
M,
"Gangsters, Atheletes, Rappers... same ol' same ol'."
Please try to say something intelligent. Thanks.
Posted by: James | Jan 30, 2007 9:21:54 PM
James,
try honesty.
Posted by: M | Jan 30, 2007 9:39:26 PM
M,
I don't need honesty lessons from you. If you want to have a serious conversation then let's. If you want to talk noise, then I'm sure you and brother Oscar can entertain each other.
peace brother
Posted by: James | Jan 30, 2007 9:44:24 PM
"African Americans killing each other is not news. Gangsters, Atheletes, Rappers... same ol' same ol'."
Wow, you proved my point by completly missing my point....what an idiot. And how sad that you think an entire race can be summed up in three words.
Posted by: FanGirlHater | Jan 30, 2007 10:16:25 PM
I forwarded this story to everyone I knew when Andy first posted it a while back (I need to stop forwarding news stories as my friends have termed me "Debbie Downer" lol). Such a tragedy, but what Anthony Castro overcame in his short life to finally find happiness is such a blessing, something many people don't discover in a lifetime. Anthony's life has an invaluable lesson: no matter what life throws our way (and it could always be worse), it's important to make the most of what we are given and to cherish every second like it's our last.
Posted by: Cory | Jan 30, 2007 10:32:56 PM
Seems you have missed the point fang face.
http://www.playahata.com
Posted by: M | Jan 30, 2007 10:47:53 PM
"I got po chasin' me, babies mammas tryn ta get wit me, so I get them glocks rocks and dust the dirt of my shoulders the cops an them bolders" -- Jay-Z
Posted by: M | Jan 30, 2007 11:22:48 PM
M,
O, I see. Jay Z is the only person out there. Okay. I'll play along and quote someone too!
"The Albuquerque Graveyard" by Jay Wright
It would be easier
to bury our dead
at the corner lot.
No need to wake
before sunrise,
take three buses,
walk two blocks,
search at the rear
of the cemetery,
to come upon the familiar names
with wilted flowers and patience.
But now I am here again.
After so many years
of coming here,
passing the sealed mausoleums,
the pretentious brooks and springs,
the white, sturdy limestone crosses,
the pattern of the place is clear to me.
I am going back to the Black limbo,
an unwritten history
of our own tensions.
The dead lie here
in a hierarchy of small defeats.
I can almost see the leaders smile,
ashamed now of standing
at the head of those
who lie tangled
at the edge of the cemetery
still ready to curse and rage a
s I do.
Here, I stop by the imitative cross
of one who stocked his parlor
with pictures of Robeson,
and would boom down the days,
dreaming of Othello's robes.
I say he never bothered me,
and forgive his frightened singing.
Here, I stop by the simple mound
of a woman who taught me
spelling on the sly,
parsing my tongue
to make me fit for her own dreams.
I could go on all day,
unhappily recognizing small heroes, discontent with finding them here, reproaches to my own failings.
Uneasy, I search the names
and simple mounds I call my own,
abruptly drop my wilted flowers,
and turn for home.
Posted by: James | Jan 30, 2007 11:44:22 PM
Cyd, no problem brother. I think you showed incredible restraint and were very polite in responding to my comment; especially having known what you did about Mr. Takacs' work with Anthony. I'm not so sure I would have been so polite.
PeterParker, interesting observations. However, I'm not sure why they were directed to me. I obviously didn't know any details about the counselor and the level of involvement he had with Mr. Castro. Perhaps you meant to address your questions to Cyd.
For those of you who are stirring up off-topic flame wars, have some class and give it a rest. This discussion is intended to honor the life and memorialize the passing of a dynamic young man.
You may have no respect for each other but please have the decency to respect this kid's memory.
Posted by: Zeke | Jan 30, 2007 11:47:37 PM
Read the poem Zeke. Read the poem.
Posted by: James | Jan 30, 2007 11:50:46 PM
http://www.pe.com/localnews/inland/stories/PE_News_Local_H_twodead23.242aa99.html
news link
Posted by: jsw | Jan 31, 2007 12:06:17 AM
Is it just me or has Cyd avoided commenting at all about the possibility that liquor was involved. He's all about giving information about the situation except that one part. Must be tough to handle.
Posted by: Mike | Jan 31, 2007 12:30:47 AM
Leland, well the fact that he was cute makes it an even greater tragedy. Yes I'm shallow, so what? I'm 19 and allowed to be...you were once too. If this guy was ugly it would be sad but not that sad.
Posted by: Ed | Jan 31, 2007 1:33:56 AM
Mark M,
I didn't mean to sound judgemental with that last part of my comment above, but it does sound that way. I was just trying to get my point across as succinctly as possible.
I'm just not sure why this guy is being held up to such acclaim. What exactly did he do? A lot of teenagers are coming out while in high school today. He suffered some abuse, rejection from his family, but a lot of children, gay and straight, suffer from abuse and rejection.
I'm not sure it's so admirable that he came out so young. Speaking as someone who did, and who luckily had a family that was loving and supportive, if someone is a minor and is not sure if his/her family will react badly or not, the best advice probably is to keep your mouth shut. Wait until you are out on your own and somewhat financially secure before you come out.
There's a price to be paid for honesty. It's easy when you're an adult to say, gosh, I wish I had come out when I was that young. That's so brave and honorable, blah blah blah. I'm worried that young people will see this kind of story and the comments that follow and think that in order to be genuine and true to who they are, they have to COME OUT NOW!!! No, you don't have to, come out when you're sure it won't derail your life. Think about what's best for you and your life and weigh your options.
Posted by: Chris | Jan 31, 2007 2:23:19 AM
"I'm just not sure why this guy is being held up to such acclaim. What exactly did he do?"
Posted by: Chris |
I can't answer for everyone, as each person has their own take on this..but to me the acclaim is not just about Anthony Castro -even though he deserves every bit of it as a human being.
It's really all about "symbols". We all need symbols in our lives, or role models, and sometimes the best ones to look up to for inspiration are not those who've had the benefit of a cleverly crafted image by a PR team, but ordinary everyday heroes..
What Anthony symbolizes is the spirit of thousands of teenage gay teens (as you rightfully point out) whose incredible courage and will to survive are often overlooked by society, and maybe sometimes our own community, because:
1)they're not seen as models of what the majority considered as manly or strong.
2)from our perspective what they go through isn't extraordinary since we've been through it ourselves.
I feel that on the contrary, the fact we *know* what those teens are going through, for having evolved as glbt youth in homophobic school systems or competitive sport, we should be able to communicate to the world: "those kids have more courage than you'll ever know!". Hence why we should honor their form of courage, which is courage of the Heart..the courage to be who you are - as heart can often be a powerful force for change.
That's why Chris I don't think you should necessarly see yourself in a form of 'competition' with Anthony, because if he's honored by all & ESPN; and if a positive and understanding light is shined upon his journey -as imperfect and ordinary it may have been-, then YOU and the rest of us are being honored as well.
That's how I'm percieving the honoring of Anthony Castro.
ps sorry I wrote a mini essay, I needed to get those emotions off my chest tonight :)
Posted by: Da | Jan 31, 2007 4:01:47 AM
DA and Zeke, Thanks for expressing so elequently why Anthony Castro's death strikes such a chord with so many of us. I could not post earlier--too many memories of too many lost brothers whose courage was not recognized. As for James and the flamers, ignore them. Trolls expire if you do not feed them.
Posted by: rudy | Jan 31, 2007 6:53:24 AM
Chris,
Your observation about his looks is absolutely correct to my mind, and the people on here don't want to admit it.
If he had been a huge queen with painted nails, I doubt we would see such sympathy.
Posted by: jmg | Jan 31, 2007 7:45:33 AM
JMG and Chris,
I cannot speak for anyone else on this thread, but my admiration of Anthony has nothing to do with his looks. I could easily generalize and say that your points of view are more about being jealous and envious of goodlooking masculine men because the two of you probably aren't. But that would be petty and unfair of me because I don't know you.
I have already conceded that it's a valid point that a girlie boy wouldn't have gotten as much attention. But I challenge you to find more teens like Anthony - a jock who came out to his friends and family - than teens who are effeminate. The reason I know you won't is because teens like Anthony are much less common. As I have already pointed out, it's because many masculine boys simply hide.
"It's easy when you're an adult to say, gosh, I wish I had come out when I was that young. That's so brave and honorable, blah blah blah."
Well Chris, my own personal "blah blah blah" happens to include several years of deep depression, eating disorders and thoughts of suicide. That's the price I paid for keeping my sexual orientation to myself. I take full responsibility - I only have myself to blame, but the fact remains I was miserable. Only after I came out did I truly begin to live.
And yes, I wish I had Anthony as a role model. I will make no apologies for honoring him and finding inspiration in his story.
Posted by: mark m | Jan 31, 2007 9:25:18 AM
Too bad the espn.com article had to link back to Outsports, where the average guy reading espn.com will be horrified by the ads.
Posted by: Steve | Jan 31, 2007 9:26:39 AM
"I could easily generalize and say that your points of view are more about being jealous and envious of goodlooking masculine men because the two of you probably aren't. But that would be petty and unfair of me because I don't know you."
Way to say without saying it!
I have been involved with gay sports for a while now. Many (not all) of the people I have met through sports have the attitude that the club/drag queen/theater/performance art scene is not just "not their thing," but actually inferior and insulting to their persona of "I am straight except for the cock up my ass every other day."
There is more than a little bit of condescension towards more flamboyantly gay men.
Posted by: jmg | Jan 31, 2007 10:13:05 AM
I can't comment on the alcohol or any other legal aspect of the case because of the possibility that Cody will be formally charged and tried, and I'm getting information that isn't for public consumption.
I also can't comment on the seatbelt question, as California has a seatbelt law that may have applied in this case - and again, I don't want to comment on the legal aspects of this case until they go away.
All I will say is that the assumptions some of you are making on these two topics are incorrect.
Posted by: Cyd | Jan 31, 2007 10:38:02 AM
JMG,
Again, yes, you are right. Many gay men look down on flamboyent gays. But you are assuming that prejudice exists here in this thread where none has been expressed.
I have yet to hear you concede that there aren't many teens like Anthony - whether in high school sports or professional sports.
Do you deny that?
If you don't, then just look at it this way. Men who look down on other men for being feminine have issues that go beyond being homophobic. They equate female with being less than a man. So it's really sexism.
Many straights view gay men as stereotypes - hairdressers, drag queens, silly wispy limp wristed oddities. That's because as long as they see gays as being girls with penises, they can marginalize and dehumanize them - because of their own sexism towards women.
A masculine jock challenges that perception and breaks down stereotypes. (and for the record, I applaud straight hairdressers because they break down stereotypes too). Suddenly they are forced to see gay men as being a diverse group of people.... just like anyone else.
Why is that wrong?
Posted by: mark m | Jan 31, 2007 11:36:58 AM
No, I don't deny the rarity of an Anthony Castro. And we don't even know if he was "masculine," anyway.
Obviously, there is no way that I can prove that there would be less sympathy after the death of a queenie nail salon worker; it's just what I think.
All that stuff about breaking down stereotypes is true, but I still think there is more to the story than simply he was a rare bird in the gay aviary. It's that people think he was a BETTER bird (BETTER plumage).
Posted by: jmg | Jan 31, 2007 11:57:33 AM
Cyd, that is just nonsense. You can address the question is alcohol was involved, it's been stated in news articles. The problem with the news articles is there is often no followup to say wether the charges were dropped or not. You cannot tell me that IF a news outlet wanted to cover the story right now they wouldn't actually state the blood level. Give me a break. I think this has more to do with protecting Cody and your emotions about this terrible event.
Posted by: Mike | Jan 31, 2007 12:14:47 PM
For once, I actually agree with some of the posters on this site. While I do feel glum whenever ANYONE young dies so tragically, if Castro had been unattractive, a person of color, or effeminate, there would be no write-ups about him. This situation mirrors the times whenever a young people get kidnapped: the white girls get full media coverage, while the ugly/minority children are quickly forgotten. Having said that, I do commend this young man for coming out while in school, especially as an athlete, but there has to be some type of social commentary to go with this story. I do not wish to offend the memory of Andrew, though. Carry on...
Posted by: Jared | Jan 31, 2007 2:19:02 PM
Jared...exactly.
Posted by: FanGirlHater | Jan 31, 2007 3:15:41 PM
Mike, you don't know what you're talking about, and you're not going to drag me into your nonsense.
I know things that aren't in the press regarding these issues. Once the case is dropped or completed, I will happily share any information I know. I've been asked to not share these specifics of the case and I won't.
Posted by: cyd | Jan 31, 2007 3:56:57 PM
"All that stuff about breaking down stereotypes is true, but I still think there is more to the story than simply he was a rare bird in the gay aviary. It's that people think he was a BETTER bird (BETTER plumage)."
QFT!
Posted by: Je | Jan 31, 2007 6:00:04 PM
I'm suprised by the comments on the guy's looks being a direct factor in how much you feel for the guy.
The guy could've been an ugly duckling and it would still be a sad story.
JMG makes a great point about how looks seem to play such a large role in our society and the gay community. It's sad.
Yes, I have a soul, so what? I'm 17 and allowed to have one.
Posted by: Seann | Jan 31, 2007 10:29:59 PM
I think many of you are showing your age (actually your immaturity) by turning this young man's death around into a debate about why goodlooking jocks get all the attention.
I was a geek in school. i was the kid that jocks picked on and called "faggot". Believe me, I relate much more to the nerds and girlie boys because I was an outsider too.
But if you think you're enlightening anyone by bringing up a "what if" argument about a sissy boy's death, don't bother.
The jocks will always be held up for praise and adulation over the nerds, smart kids and the sissy boys.
Welcome to life.
Now, stop making this young man's death about your social insecurities.
Posted by: mark m | Feb 1, 2007 9:27:14 AM
"The jocks will always be held up for praise and adulation over the nerds, smart kids and the sissy boys."
As long as people like you keep this noxious flame burning, yes, they will be. And here I though the gays wanted to change things....hmmmm...
Posted by: jmg | Feb 1, 2007 9:38:04 AM