05/09/2008
Grey's Anatomy Features Gay Soldier Story, Kiss
Last night's Grey's Anatomy featured the gay soldier romance I posted about in mid-April. I've clipped the opening scene of the story for those who are interested after the jump. It doesn't give away how the episode ends (and I won't either) but this clip should get your heart racing a bit.
The soldiers were played by Benny Ciaramello (Friday Night Lights' Santiago) and MTV Road Rules grad David Giuntoli. Well done, boys.
Watch it, AFTER THE JUMP...
Previously
Grey's Anatomy to Feature Hot Gay Soldier Kiss [tr]
Posted 8:15 AM EST by Andy in Don't Ask, Don't Tell, Military, News, Television | Permalink
Comments
I'm crying now Andy, thanks a lot! I'm such a wuss sometimes...
Posted by: Lee | May 9, 2008 8:16:25 AM
I love that more networks are showing male/male affection, but why do the actors always have kiss like they are trying to eat each other's faces off?.. would love to see just one tender, normal type kiss between guys instead of what can only be described as full on foreplay.
Posted by: badboybobo | May 9, 2008 8:19:58 AM
Man, are you yanks starved.
Posted by: Protogenes | May 9, 2008 8:28:56 AM
Hey BADBOYBOBO, that wasn't "full on foreplay", that was what you call a passionate kiss. Even Meredith was jealous! You see heterosexual couples kissing that way all the time on TV; why can't you see a homosexual couple kissing that way without thinking it's the beginning of foreplay??
Posted by: paul | May 9, 2008 8:33:48 AM
The kiss fit the storyline. It showed how despereate they were to be together. I also liked how the writers had no problem drawing a parrallel between the soldiers' relationship problems and the problems between Derek and Meredith.
Posted by: Cadence | May 9, 2008 8:34:51 AM
Awww... that was so sweet.
I didn't think the kiss was over the top. I mean, the guy has a brain tumor!
Posted by: Aman Chaudhary | May 9, 2008 8:45:46 AM
Typical, the gay man dies...
How about he tells his father and the military official that he is gay; they deal with it because he is an excellent son and soldier; the military official lets him stay with his partner/boyfriend; and most importantly HE LIVES after the surgery with a kiss planted on him while he sleeps.
Sure they are trying to make a stance against Don't Ask Don't Tell but come on these depictions are way too farcical. Also men who enter the army these days are fully aware of the situation and if that is or becomes a problem for you choose something else.
The gay community is all HOT and bothered over a gay kiss on prime time TV and that is just not enough for "me" these days. Sure that is enough for many but you have seen gay men kiss on various venues. Are we really still that moved by a kiss? Maybe I am missing something.
He is going into brain surgery but at time all bets are off and well, it would have been braver to stand up and say that you love each other. I mean you may die but you are going to just stare. This for me reeks of self-loathing (you can take a bullet or even kill someone else but you cannot open your mouth and say anything further illustrates that being gay is something that can be hidden) for gays as it would have been easy to say, "I love you", yes it is rational that a man to say that for another man who is going into BRAIN SURGERY.
Who cares what others may view that as, it is there and it is something he can carry in his heart.
Posted by: Charles | May 9, 2008 9:02:20 AM
To Charles:
The reason "we" are hot and bothered by it is because this is a Prime Time show, that a SHIT load of people watch! One of the rarities for the gay community. They protrayed this perfectly. They showed how a military person CANNOT tell anyone because of DADT, how homophobic this world is! Thats why they did it they way they did.
Posted by: Jacksclarinet07 | May 9, 2008 9:09:36 AM
Charles,
Will you marry me?
Nick
Posted by: Nick | May 9, 2008 9:17:23 AM
I hear you but for the men who find love in the barracks there are countless number of men who enjoy the sexual freedom and the adventure of being a closeted military man going from place to place having sex with other men who enjoy a man in uniform.
How about this dying soldier had a responsibility to himself to tell his family that he was gay? How about they were understanding and let the military be the "bad guy". The dying man is over 18 and he is firing and being fired upon yet he cannot sit down and discuss with his family his sexual identity. Yes, that reeks of self-loathing when I see that. If they cannot handle it, you make another family that can and build on that.
Sure it is a TV show and they have scant minutes to get it all wrapped; but again for me it was typical: the gay man died, the other gay man cannot and will not say anything. Those people who believe that gays can and should shut up about their lifestyles are seeing exactly what they believe and endorse.
Posted by: Charles | May 9, 2008 9:26:56 AM
Nick, we need to start a slow courtship one with clarity of feelings and expressions that will build.
If you are game I will take that chance. Do hold my hand tiny dancer, we are spinning ever so fast.
Please let me know that you are sincere as my heart is awaiting your answer.
Posted by: Charles | May 9, 2008 9:30:12 AM
Charles, go get that coffee now and make it a double espresso.
Posted by: gabe | May 9, 2008 9:47:17 AM
Am I doing something wrong? It's not there?
Posted by: secretagentman | May 9, 2008 9:56:04 AM
Am I doing something wrong? It's not there?
Posted by: secretagentman | May 9, 2008 9:57:48 AM
Charles, the way the story played out was more realistic, and it let people know what gay soldiers, and gay people over all have to go through. And the soldier didn't come out just because of his father, he knew that he was dying, and that coming out could ruin his boyfriends career. But at least the boyfriend was strong enough to realize that his career wasn't more important than being there for the person that he loves.
Posted by: Cadence | May 9, 2008 9:59:50 AM
Do we need to get rice for the wedding of Charles and Nick or just the hose...LOL!
Posted by: Bojo | May 9, 2008 10:09:11 AM
Do we need to get rice for the wedding of Charles and Nick or just the hose...LOL!
Posted by: Bojo | May 9, 2008 10:09:49 AM
Wow! That was so touching. It's crazy to think that these forbidden loves happen all the time, and they have to be kept secret. I hate that we still have this antiquated law, Don't Ask Don't Tell. It hurts us more than we know, and surly doesn't help those affected. I should know, I was kicked out twice.
Posted by: Jason Knight | May 9, 2008 10:25:37 AM
Andy, is there any way that you could give us a heads up about these shows just before they are to come on?
I am sick that I missed both the Brothers and Sisters episode and this Grey's Anatomy episode. I don't watch very much television, especially in the evening, but I would certainly like to tune in when these special moments happen. I met my husband when we both were in the military so the proposal episode of B&S and the GA episodes hit close to home.
You may have absolutely no way of knowing when these particular programs will air but if you do please give us a heads up the day of or the day before.
Thanks.
Does anyone know how I might be able to see the complete B&S and GA episodes?
Posted by: Zeke | May 9, 2008 10:29:00 AM
Yes, that would help out a lot, Andy...if you can. Also, would y'all please send Zeke his T-shirt. It's getting warm down there in Florida. He's ready for it now.
Thanks.
Posted by: Derrick from Philly | May 9, 2008 10:39:12 AM
To be fair, there was that little nod between the boyfriend and the father at the end, suggesting that the father acknowledges how important they were to each other. That shows at least some acceptance on the part of the family not to completely ignore that aspect of their son's life. I think the whole portrayal was very realistic, and was glad that the father was so three-dimensional; he could have easily been portrayed as a bigot through and through.
Posted by: Zack | May 9, 2008 10:40:07 AM
Zeke, Alerting folks to gay content in upcoming tv shows and movies is pretty much the reason that afterelton.com exists. They had both the Brothers & Sisters proposal and this Grey's Anatomy episode flagged weeks ago. On the other hand, they don't come close to rivaling Andy's coverage of political stories and societal issues.
Posted by: Thomasina | May 9, 2008 10:44:55 AM
Zeke,
I'm pretty sure you watch B&S and GA on ABC.com
Posted by: Jason | May 9, 2008 10:51:50 AM
THOMASINA, I'm so glad you mentioned AfterElton. It's a great blog/site; it's well written, culturally diverse, and so inclusive. I get so caught up in the emotional rollercoasters here in Towleroad (which I obviously enjoy) that I rarely visit that great site. Got to make up for lost visits.
Posted by: Derrick from Philly | May 9, 2008 11:00:32 AM
I apologize for not flagging it, as I had written the preview post linked to above. I actually wasn't aware that it was airing last night and happened to watch Grey's, which I usually leave to watch a few days later.
Posted by: andy | May 9, 2008 11:05:41 AM
And I started my day happy. Now you just made me cry. :-(
Posted by: donsnyc | May 9, 2008 11:16:50 AM
I love that they were both adorable, but I also hate it that they were both adorable...if that makes sense. The fact that both actors had to be white also troubles me, but it's nice to see gay men kissing more on tv in the USA. The fact that it usually always happens during sweeps seems rather exploitive a bit. Let's hope tv strives for more gay characters as part of their regular casts (such as on Brothers & Sisters) and not just used occasionally for ratings during sweeps.
Posted by: Patrick | May 9, 2008 11:38:19 AM
Look...I watch prime time television for the original premise, fictional drama, comedy etc. I watch the history channel etc for non fiction. I cannot stand writers with agenda's....what is wrong with the Brady Bunch and Sanford and son....no agendas just a few laughs....if those writers think anything will change because of this, I pity them. The strike must have gone to their egotistical heads. Did you know SpongeBob beats up on all of these shows? What does that tell us? Give it a rest and find a better forum for your agendas and activism. Too chicken to come out of the studio protest, or to write legistlation or take on any risk?
Posted by: ernie | May 9, 2008 11:57:10 AM
A gay kiss interrupted by the untimely appearance of a disapproving parent. Why can't we, dramatically speaking, advance beyond this? Everyone is talking about the fight for gay marriage and our TV selves are still stuck in adolescence--"OMG! Did they really kiss onscreen?!?"
Posted by: christopher | May 9, 2008 12:02:38 PM
A gay kiss interrupted by the untimely appearance of a disapproving parent. Why can't we, dramatically speaking, advance beyond this? Everyone is talking about the fight for gay marriage and our TV selves are still stuck in adolescence--"OMG! Did they really kiss onscreen?!?"
Posted by: christopher | May 9, 2008 12:03:51 PM
Guys, I have enjoyed your reflections almost as much as the show itself. It was indeed an emotional moment for me as it reminded me of how blessed I am to have the acceptance of my family's (and my partner of 12 years' family) love and acceptance. It was a realistic portrayal of what a number of my friends experience and they are not in the military! I am grateful to have this dialogue with others on a site that offers us not only one perspective of what gay men want. I like the visuals, but I also appreciate the exchange.
Posted by: Bobby | May 9, 2008 12:24:20 PM
I was a little downtrodden that it wasn't a happy ending. But I guess it WAS realistic. In a way, I'm proud of the show. A lot of my straight friends watch Grey's and sometimes they don't have a clue as to how it is being a gay man. It was short and it spoke volumes and raised awareness, that's for sure. I can't wait to discuss this episode with them.
Posted by: qram | May 9, 2008 12:57:33 PM
Damn, David Giuntoli is HOT!!!!!!!
Posted by: peterparker | May 9, 2008 12:58:50 PM
Once again, ABC seems waaaay out in front of the other networks when it comes to gay issues, so kudos to them again.
Aside from the cliches of timing, I think the scene was well done. Why they weren't in a military hospital I don't know, not having seen the whole thing. Maybe someone can explain that. Now it would have been really touching for the family to have invited the lover to the funeral.
Posted by: anon | May 9, 2008 1:49:54 PM
Anon, Meredith and Derek are working on an experimental program to help terminally ill patients who have brain tumors. There was nothing that the mililitary doctor, who appeared in the episode, could do for the soldier. The experimental procedure, was his last hope.
Posted by: Cadence | May 9, 2008 2:13:04 PM
For the record, the "Ernie" above is not the Ernie who usually comments on Towleroad, namely me. (I thought I was the only Ernie--yikes!) I wouldn't have pointed this out except I couldn't stand the idea that I might be associated with the other E's opinions, which I heartily disagree with. Unlike the other Ernie, I applaud writers with agendas (as long as they're good writers with good agendas), but their agendas should never be spelled "agenda's." Thank you.
P.S. This Ernie didn't see the show, but he liked the scene.
Posted by: Ernie | May 9, 2008 3:33:35 PM
I don't normally watch Grey's but I found the clip of the Kiss pretty exciting. It appeared well done and I went looking for a recap of what happened. Sad that the guy died and, I take it from reading here, the other guy wasn't able to do much about it or come to any closure.
Does anyone know if the actors were gay in real life. Doubtful, but that would make it much more interesting. If Luke MacFarland (sp) can play a gay character, maybe one of these guys can. I know I watched the David's season of Road Rules. I just can't recall if that was before they had a token gay character on it or not (or if he was it).
Posted by: Theophilus | May 9, 2008 5:32:07 PM
Andy,
Would you please make sure you give us ample time and let us know when the 4506th episode of The Young and the Restless will be airing? I think it is only fair that you do this for us....good lord!!!! Zeke...hit record/timer on your VCR, DVR or TIVO, dude!!!
Posted by: Johnny | May 9, 2008 7:02:28 PM
THOMASINA, thanks for the heads up about AfterElton.com. I'll have to check that out.
JOHNNY, why so bitter? Why do you have to be such an ass? I wasn't being an ass to Andy or complaining that he didn't give us a heads up. I simply asked if it would be possible for him to give us a heads up IF he is able to. I certainly would have set my DVR but I didn't know anything about either of these shows. Forgive me if I don't spend my every waking evening watching television.
Posted by: Zeke | May 9, 2008 8:26:03 PM
EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
Posted by: Alex | May 9, 2008 8:55:54 PM
I caught the end of the show, after he had died of encephalitis, and his lover planted a kiss on his lips. I cried like a baby. Gay or straight, that was a beautiful moment, beautifully acted.
Posted by: Chris | May 10, 2008 12:13:03 AM
Believe you are oppressed and you are. It is becoming more natural to see this type of affection on television, and while it may not be "in your face" enough for certain people, understand that the type of change you seek, the deep-seeded real type of change, has to be allowed to grow.
We have to lead by example, and yes while shows like this will be dictated largely by others simply trying to garner ratings (that's the business), people who show they are self-actualized and understand how the system works, will be able to overcome these mindless obstacles and often time self imposed prisons.
Act oppressed and you are oppressed. Act an equal and you will become one.
Posted by: ElSteveo | May 10, 2008 9:43:01 AM
First, I would like to thank Andy for his wonderful website. I don't usually watch GREY'S ANATOMY and would have missed Thursday's episode had I not seen mention of it here. I was able to go on ABC.com and watch it two days later. I would also like to thank ABC for giving us two wonderful gay storylines this week. Sunday's BROTHERS & SISTERS and GREY'S ANATOMY moved me in a way I have not been moved by a television show in quite some time.
Posted by: Bob | May 10, 2008 4:34:11 PM
Thanks, Peterparker, for posting the phrase I kept repeating during each of David Giuntoli's scenes! Oh, to be in a bed underneath those gorgeous baby blues and totally kissable lips. Woof! :)
Posted by: ClarkKent | May 11, 2008 2:31:58 AM
For me, watching the episode was a weird experience. When I first saw the gay soldier storyline, I was ecstatic, mainly by the fact that the show portrayed it in such a bittersweet way. But then after having watched it, I was pretty much down for the rest of the day. The fact that the soldiers couldn't even say goodbye before the sick soldier's surgery because his father was standing nearby was heartbreaking. And more than that, unfortunately it's representative of what gay couples go through every day. Did anyone else feel that way wafter watching the episode?
Posted by: Freddie | May 11, 2008 5:08:59 AM
Gray's anatomy episode is on iTunes and the Brothers and sister's episode airs tonight on ABC.
Posted by: Lee | May 11, 2008 6:02:47 AM
Freddie, I empathize with you, the exact samething happened to me. I saw it yesterday (don't live in the US) and was pretty excited while watching it, but I've been feeling down ever since. It's such a bittersweet storyline and to think that it happens all the time in real life is beyond bearable. I am 26 and fortunate to have a loving partner for 5 years now and I keep remindind myself of how lucky I am; we all deserve our happiness. But the suffering that some people go through every day for this "impossible" relationships is heart-breaking to me.
People complaining about the fact that the soldier had the "responsability" to come out to his family have no idea of what it can be like. Many gays and lesbians are fortunate to have supportive families, but some of us don't and the tragic depiction in this episode was real, honest and spot-on. Besides, he wasn't acting only for fear of his father, but wanted to protect his guy from worse consequences. Very emotional stuff.
Bravo to ABC for tackling such important topics and doing it in a classy, intelligent manner!
Posted by: JOSEPH | May 11, 2008 1:54:23 PM
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