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1. Why the mean-spirited comment toward T.R. Knight and his boyfriend?

   What does it do for anyone other than make life more and more difficult? Is it no wonder gays find it hard to be honest with other gays about their lives due to fear of salacious comments?

   It is no wonder people do not want to come out of the closet or acknowledge anyone in their lives; far too many gays have low-self esteem due to the "gay community" ... your comment Andy is mean-spirited, plain and simple.

   I am sure many people will write in and state how they have analyzed this relationship, the age difference, the length of their courtship etc. but alas it is none of your business.

   These little quips and jabs are not necessary or worthy as they are entitled to do whatever they want.

   We all have a very tiny view of their relationship and yet far too many think they are seeing the full picture. Either simply enjoy the view or look away.

   However to throw garbage on an absolute stranger is mighty small and does not encourage anything but others to follow suit.

   Let's take the high road and congratulate one and all who want to embrace their love and affection for each other no matter the amount of time spent together, age difference, race, body type, etc etc.

   "Being gay is not an identity' that's the bottom line. It's a sideline. But through no one's fault and everybody's fault, it's become a subject for identity, so you run away from mainstream culture into a kind of offbeat culture, and then the offbeat culture becomes a little mainstream culture of its own - just as brutal, actually, as the culture you thought you were leaving behind."- Rupert Everett

   
   

   Posted by: Charles | May 1, 2008 8:49:18 AM

   
   

2. I didn't find Andy's comments mean-spirited at all - I assume you mean because he alluded to the fact that people who are dating less than 6 months should not be getting married. I completely agree with him. I am gay and that applies to straight couples, gay couples, whoever. The reason divorce rates are so high these days are because people don't take marriage seriously. This is NOT a gay/straight issue - if you think 6 months is long enough to REALLY know somebody - know them well enough to commit to spend the rest of your life with that person, you are just crazy, plain and simple.

   Posted by: john | May 1, 2008 9:20:23 AM

   
   

3. CHARLES,

   where was the mean-spirited remark?

   Also, Rupert Everett speaks for himself and those homosexual men (and women, maybe) who feel as he does. There are many of us who took refuge in that "offbeat culture" and found affirmation of our identity in it. For some of us gay people, the "running away from mainstream culture" was what saved our lives.

   Viewing "Before Stonewall" should be required for anyone who has an opinion about what it means to be gay. I wonder if Mr. Everett has seen it?

   Posted by: Derrick from Philly | May 1, 2008 9:29:59 AM

   
   

4. Come on. T.R. Knight is going to marry a kid who just turned 18 and they have been seeing each other less than 6 months.

   Posted by: Brian | May 1, 2008 9:51:07 AM

   
   

5. Ahh, marrying for publicity. Is there anything more romantic?

   Posted by: crispy | May 1, 2008 10:08:53 AM

   
   

6. The age of consent in California is 18. I'd say that's a pretty big deal, especially if they "started seeing" each other before the kid turned 18.

   This is a much too common occurence in the "community." Gays want to have it both ways. We love hate crimes legislation and anti-discrimination lawsuits. But then we tolerate... nay, even encourage... others to flagrantly violate statutory rape and drug laws.

   It pains me to say this, but how is that any different from hypocritical Christians who pick and choose which sins they'll ignore (and which they'll throw a hissy fit over),

   Posted by: John in CA | May 1, 2008 12:14:44 PM

   
   

7. "This is a much too common occurence in the "community." It is? I can't say I've ever met a 17 yr old interested in dating someone over 40, or even 30? I certainly havent seen any couples walking around the village with that kind of age disparity. I'm sure it's a fantasy for some guys, but it's not rampant around here, one of the largest gay communities in North America.

   Posted by: secretagentman | May 1, 2008 2:17:04 PM

   
   

8. WTF was mean-spirited? And I like that it was mentioned that California doesn't have "that level of dignity yet." (Real, not phony, marriage.)

   But yeah, it's not a good idea to "marry" 18 year olds you've known for a couple of months. That applies to gays, straights, and- if they existed- bisexuals.

   Posted by: Professor Von Pie | May 1, 2008 3:15:07 PM

   
   

9. I've seen a couple cases of it in West Hollywood and Long Beach. The age differences aren't as pronounced as your examples, but statutory rape is statutory rape.

   16 and 26.

   15 and 22.

   17 and 29.

   Often the minor will simply lie about their age when somebody asks. But you get a couple of drinks in the older one, and the truth becomes quite apparent. They wanted to gloat anyway.

   Believe me, if I were an undercover cop, this kind of sting operation would be the easiest job in the world.

   Posted by: John in CA | May 1, 2008 3:34:07 PM

   
   

10. It wasn't mean spirited it was predictably bitchy. Fuck what people think, I've spent all my life being judged and bitched about for not fitting into this, that, or the other. After a nice bout of depression and self loathing; I've realized if I want to stand up and marry a guy after 2 mins of knowing him, it's no ones buisness AT ALL.

    People are not in the business of being kind, understanding or happy of others. That's life.

    Good luck T.R, I don't you at all, so won't judge you-you only live once, make the best of it!

    Posted by: Johnny Boy | May 1, 2008 4:54:10 PM

    
    

11. Whoa. I normally have no problem with people dating outside their age range, but the boy's not even 21 yet! TR and Mark are totally cute together (even if TR's totally robbing the cradle), but I agree with Andy - 6 months isn't enough...

    Posted by: David | May 1, 2008 7:02:02 PM

    
    

12. They look cute together. Usually the age of consent is 17, so it's not statutory rape (unless Ca is different). 6 months is too soon to tie the knot, in my opinion, but if they're both willing, so what?

    And Johnny Boy, you need to get new friends, because all of mine are pretty nice, and we don't tolerate those who aren't.

    Posted by: DavidT | May 1, 2008 9:44:31 PM

    
    

13. from what i've read about this young man, he was ostracised by his family at 15 or 16. he managed to survive (and thrive, godammit!) on his own, earning a scholarship to college. his life and t.r.'s life, and whether they choose to make a commitment to each other is not important to me. it's no sweat off my brow. history is replete with marriages that should not work, but succeed. my parents' marriage is testament to that. if indeed they decide to "tie the knot," why do we care? they both seem like decent men. so, i wish them well. they can't make more of a joke of marriage than many, many heteros have.

    Posted by: nic | May 1, 2008 11:26:47 PM

    
    

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