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Kurt Cobain Says He Thought He Was Gay in High School in Unearthed Interview: AUDIO

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In an interview by Jon Savage recently unearthed by the PBS series Blank on Blank (and animated), late Nirvana frontman Kurt Cobain describes how he thought that he was gay in high school, and how his mother's homophobia destroyed intimate connections he had with friends.

Says Cobain:

"I even thought that I was gay. I thought that might be the solution to my problem. Although I never experimented with it, I had a gay friend, and then my mother wouldn't allow me to be friends with him anymore, because she's homophobic. It was real devastating because finally Ifound a male friend who I actually hugged and was affectionate too, and we talked about a lot of things. I couldn't hang out with him anymore."

Watch and listen, AFTER THE JUMP...

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Comments

  1. While I was more of a Soundgarden guy, and still am an AIC guy, this does explain alot about him.

    Posted by: Quicksilver | Oct 23, 2013 1:43:17 PM


  2. While I was more of a Soundgarden guy, and still am an AIC guy, this does explain alot about him.

    Posted by: Quicksilver | Oct 23, 2013 1:43:17 PM


  3. It's no fun to be on either end of that kind of situation. My friends parents made him stop hanging out with me when we were teens, even though we had an understanding and knew one was gay, one was not. My mom tried to make me stop hanging with another gay friend of mine after that and I wouldn't let it happen.

    Teenage years are such a fragile period in so many ways, to yank someone out of a positive, healthy friendship like that is incredibly cruel and shallow.

    Posted by: johnny | Oct 23, 2013 1:47:18 PM


  4. This is old news. Hasn't this been known for years?

    Posted by: Jamie | Oct 23, 2013 1:55:46 PM


  5. If you think you're gay in high school it's pretty safe to say you're gay, or bisexual.

    Posted by: TampaZeke | Oct 23, 2013 2:33:24 PM


  6. I thought I was straight in high school. Why can't it go both ways?

    Posted by: crispy | Oct 23, 2013 2:56:20 PM


  7. @ JOHNNY,

    very important comment. You made me (and I'm sure others) remember a pain that we pretend that we had long ago put aside, but never overcome. When grown ups tell your friend, "stay away from that faggot" or when your own parent tells you, "stay away from him or you'll become a faggot like him"

    Very painful memories, but what's the point in pretending they're not still somewhere in your mind.

    Posted by: Derrick from Philly | Oct 23, 2013 3:25:20 PM


  8. I didn't know WHAT I was in highschool. It was all so new to me I tried everything. Discovery comes at any age and at any time. Although I did draw naked men when I was 9 or 10.

    Posted by: tinkerbelle | Oct 23, 2013 5:25:20 PM


  9. My best friend in high school was straight and I was closeted. Because I didnt have a gf in the three years I spent in HS, ppl wispered behind my back I was gay. And I am gay. But in those fragile high school years I was deep in the closet. My best friend just dropped me all of a sudden. Never spoke to me again the rest of our last year together because he listened to everyone eles opinion. Then formed his own. I walked around silently heartbroken over this till graduation. That was a long time ago. 30 years to be exact. And Im in a great place in my life. Have been for a long time. But I will admit that sometimes if I go back to those years in my head, it still gives me a twinge of hurt. Eh. Go figure.

    Posted by: greg | Oct 23, 2013 5:59:51 PM


  10. Sorry, but I can't feel any compassion for Kobain. He did himself in and abandoned his daughter, leaving her with a mother he knew wasn't stable. It was selfish. Once a person becomes a parent they are essentially making a pledge to help raise that human being to adulthood. Why didn't he ask for help if he needed it? Why couldn't his daughter have been his reason for living? Frances Bean deserved better.

    Posted by: Mary | Oct 23, 2013 6:14:23 PM


  11. It's always interesting to hear interviews like these being dug up from the past.

    I'll never forget the impact Nirvana had on my musical journey in grade 6 primary school!

    Kurt was a searcher, just like the rest of us

    Rest In Peace

    --

    Dave McGuire
    *LIke these artists? --> JEFF BUCKLEY, ROBERT PLANT, KURT COBAIN?*
    Download my new single free @ my site below - you will dig it!
    DaveMcguireMusic.com

    Posted by: David McGuire | Oct 23, 2013 6:45:58 PM


  12. I am not Kurt C. I didn't have his life. I wasn't stupid famous and had a bunch of folks telling me what I wanted to hear.

    I didn't have massive gastric issues that had me in mind-numbing pain. I didn't have the bad luck to run into, date, then marry that Hole woman.

    I agree if you have kids you shouldn't bail on them. But men bail on their kids all the time (though not in this particular way). Women bail too.

    I have a great deal of compassion for anyone who is in that much pain. I doubt he was thinking clearly enough to see how his death would negatively affect anyone.

    Suicide isn't inevitable. It isn't the action of a person who is thinking or feeling clearly. It is so often someone just trying to make the seemingly endless pain they're in STOP.

    NOW.

    We are a terrible society for telling folks lies about suicide, and we do no-one any good by beating up on anyone who's attempted or completed suicide.

    Posted by: YsoSerious | Oct 23, 2013 7:29:08 PM


  13. " Why didn't he ask for help if he needed it?"

    At least do the man the courtesy of spelling his name correctly. He did ask for help, what do you tell someone who has mind-numbing stomach pain? What do you tell someone who in the space of six months went from poverty to being on the cover of magazines all over America and Europe? What do you tell someone who is appalled at all the meatheads his band attracted to concerts, meatheads who thought the song "Polly" was a how-to for raping a woman?


    POSTED BY: YSOSERIOUS | OCT 23, 2013 7:29:08 PM

    Great post. He was the classic guy who grew up wanting to be a rock star and then found out that it wasn't what he thought that life was going to be. See also: Rivers Cuomo of Weezer.

    Posted by: Henry Holland | Oct 23, 2013 11:14:01 PM


  14. OK, so it's Cobain (my bad.)

    I didn't know about his stomach problems. Obviously he must have been in a lot of pain in some way to end it all. I don't claim that he took his decision lightly. But it's a little hard to think he didn't realize what a horror this would be for his daughter. She'll always know that he chose to leave her. From what I heard he even left a note for her. I heard someone post the contents somewhere, and it came across as angry and self-indulgent rather than despondent.

    Yes, a lot of fathers bail out on their kid. But this doesn't make it right. By the time Cobain killed himself there had already been a lot of talk about the effects of children growing up without fathers. I'm sure he saw these effects in a lot of people his own age who were products of the disastrous family decline of the 1970's and beyond.

    But one question: ysoangry?

    Posted by: Mary | Oct 23, 2013 11:43:50 PM


  15. Mary, so not only do you know nothing about this but you also know nothing about Courtney Love. She may aswell have pulled the trigger, though I agree, what that girl has had to go through makes me shiver with her mum.

    And her mum is still lauded by the fashion world and considered a legend. Life.

    Posted by: Rowan | Oct 24, 2013 6:16:01 AM


  16. "I found it hard.
    It's hard to find.
    Well whatever nevermind."

    Posted by: Brian | Oct 24, 2013 6:15:19 PM


  17. Hmmm. Years ago I read an article online from one of Cobain's Nirvana bandmates and friend. It was in a Seattle paper. Reading the comments posted, I was struck by how predictable and overly sentimental they were. I decided to post a comment, in which I referenced Kurt's serious drug addiction, and how this alone could have been the main cause of his suicide. The physiological side effects of his serious addiction alone could have resulted in his killing himself. I thought and think many people make his death sound more substantive than it really was. I also referenced the life professional musicians lead, the touring, the odd hours, sleep problems, family stress, the abundance of drugs and alcohol, and other temptations. The big money for the successful, and the downtime and boredom, along with the need to be on point even when it's midnight in a strange city after a long day. To my surprise, the author responded to my post, only my post, and said basically what I wrote had merit.

    We don't really know who the real Cobain and those in similar positions really was or in the present time, really are. Such of what we think as fact is in fact scripted. Whatever. RIP Mr. Cobain.

    Posted by: ratbastard | Oct 24, 2013 8:55:48 PM


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