SNL Weekend Update’s leading headline was the midterm elections and its huge number of historic firsts, including the nation’s first openly gay man elected governor, Jared Polis.
Added Jost: “It’s weird to me that the media uses the term ‘openly’ gay, which just implies there are a bunch of other governors out there they’re pretty sure about. But for now they’re still going to call them confirmed bachelors.”
Also covered: Beto O’Rourke’s campaign of garlic and crosses against Ted Cruz, Stacey Abrams’ run-off with Brian Kemp, Florida’s ballot initiatives, the suburban women revolt, and Trump’s denial that he uses racial slurs.
Cecily Strong joined the broadcast as the White House intern hired to take things away from people, like Jim Acosta’s mic and Colin Jost’s pencil.
Once she got the pencil the news went on to cover Trump’s appointment of “Michael Chiklis impersonator” Matthew Whitaker as acting attorney general, until Strong’s intern returned to accuse Jost of punching her.
Weekend Update then addressed last week’s controversy, when Pete Davidson mocked Dan Crenshaw for his eye injury, which took place while he was serving in Afghanistan.
Said Davidson: “In what I’m sure was a huge shock for people who know me, I made a poor choice last week. I made a joke about Lieutenant Commander Dan Crenshaw and on behalf of the show and myself, I apologize. I mean this from the bottom of my heart, it was a poor choice of words. The man is a war hero and he deserves all the respect in the world and if any good came from this, maybe it’s that for one day, the left and the right finally came together and agreed on something… that I’m a d–k.”
Crenshaw then rolled in on a chair, and Davidson invited him to make fun of a photo of him.
Said Crenshaw: “This is Pete Davidson. He looks like if the meth from Breaking Bad is a person. He looks like a troll doll with a tapeworm. Pete looks like Martin Short in The Santa Clause 3. By the way, one of these guys is actually good on SNL.”
Back to the news: Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s fall, Gritty’s write-in campaign for governor, People Magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive Idris Elba, the Spice Girls reunion tour (sponsored by Old Spice), the NYC marathon proposal, the Walmart alligator, and a woman who celebrated her 106th birthday at Taco Bell.