The Daily Show‘s Trevor Noah and The Late Show‘s Stephen Colbert hilariously unpacked Day 3 of President Donald Trump’s Senate impeachment trial on Wednesday night.
Both hosts focused on how some senators appear to have become bored with their constitutional duties, and resorted to violating the rules of the chamber by using their phones or even leaving.
“This is not a good look, people,” Noah quipped. “Imagine if normal people tried to pull that sh*t in the middle of jury duty. … If you didn’t want to be bored at work, you shouldn’t have become a senator. You should have stuck with race-car driving, Mitch McConnell, but you didn’t like what the wind did to your neck flaps.”
Noah added that he wishes Trump would make good on his stated desire to show up at the trial, because then the president would have less time to do things like roll back the Clean Water Act.
“The world is going to be flooded, and Trump is like, ‘Wait, wait, poison the water first. I want to make this the best apocalypse of all time.'”
Colbert, meanwhile, took aim at individual Republican senators including South Carolina’s Lindsey Graham, who reportedly left the chamber for a 20-minute bathroom break, and Tennessee’s Marsha Blackburn, who was reading a book.
Colbert even offered up his own activity book for senators, 101 Fun Things to Do in the Senate Other Than Pay Attention to Impeachment, featuring puzzles like, “Getting Money to Ukraine through the Maze of Corruption.”
Finally, Colbert noted that Trump “fan-boy” Matt Gaetz was left off the president’s impeachment defense team, perhaps because the Florida Republican congressman dared support a recent resolution to rein in the president’s war powers.
“If your lips leave Trump’s ass even for a second, even if it’s just to put on some Chapstick, you’re dead to him,” Colbert said of Gaetz.
