06/06/2007
Gay Iraq War Vet: Steady Gay Couples Common at Camp Lejeune
--EXCLUSIVE--
Pride '07, the annual publication of Interpride, The International Association of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Intersex Pride Coordinators, which you may have seen in summers past, begins shipping this week with a cover story on two gay American soldiers who came out while serving, began a clandestine love affair, and have since become active in calling for the repeal of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell".
Former Marine Lieutenant Antonio Agnone and former Senior Airman Brandon Juarez met while performing respective familial and military duties in Washington D.C, during President Bush's inauguration in 2005. Now out of the military, the two have begun a campaign to put an end to its discriminatory policies toward gays.
In the article, Agnone and Juarez tell writer Tim Kilbride that their frustration over the military's policies ignited over one phone call Agnone made to Juarez from Iraq on a day he had been shot at. The couple realized that the military would never notify Juarez if something happened to Agnone. Their "growing resentment" over the forced secrecy and discriminatory treatment compelled Agnone and Juarez to begin speaking out. It's a resentment felt by many in the military's ranks, they say, and "undercuts the ideals the military seeks to instill in all its service members."
Agnone and Juarez also detail the lengths they went to in order to keep their relationship a secret, and reveal a hush-hush underground gay support network within the military not unlike the secret societies that existed before the gay liberation movement began in the 50's and 60's.
Writes Kilbride:
'When I was in the military I depended on the people who had gone before,' Agnone explains. "And then when I realized that, okay, I need to start doing what I can for gay issues, too, I kind of see myself as almost standing on their shoulders." Already, he says, he served as a guidance counselor of sorts for fellow gay Marines and sailors at Camp Lejeune. It wasn't a role he sought, but it ended up being one he came to embrace. "One day I was sitting at work and I got an email. And my heart stopped because the email said basically, 'I saw you at the club last night.' And there's only one club in Wilmington. I mean, there's one club, one gay bar.After deleting any trace of the message, he recalls, "I ended up going, 'Well shit, if I don't write them back they're going to think that I'm mean, then what will happen? I don't even know who this person is.' So I wrote back and I was like, 'Here's my cell phone number. Don't email me anymore. Just call.' And so I ended up becoming almost a mentor for this person, and through that developed a network of many, many other Marines, and sailors, actually.
It was great, you know, because he had a stable life, and so they could confide in (him)," Juarez observes. It's clearly a responsibility both of them take very seriously. And that willingness to be of service and support, to mentor younger gay soldiers attempting to navigate not only their military duties and careers—but their lives—with a two-ton boulder strapped to their back is something they both admire in each other. "We actually found out that there's a lot of us," Agnone says with lingering amazement. "There were just steady couples at Camp Lejeune in the middle of North Carolina.
To a gay man who's worked with the military for years, that's still a surprising thing to hear. Conventional Washington wisdom holds that if you took all the gay people off Capitol Hill and out of the White House the government would shut down, but that's not an assertion I would include the military in.
And yet, here are two guys from the inside saying, "Yes, in fact, if 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' really achieved its goal, our nation's readiness would be in very serious trouble.
Agnone insists that it's an "extreme minority of bigots" shaping the military's policy on gays and wonders why these bigots are being protected. Expect to see more of him in the coming months. Agnone begins another 'tour of duty' this month with HRC, designed to help put a human face on the efforts to repeal 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell'. Here's a message in reaction to last night's Republican debate and the cowardly, bigoted positions taken by the candidates.
Look for the Pride '07 publication, edited by Peter McQuaid, as it rolls out in various cities over the summer. It should arrive in Los Angeles this week in advance of L.A. Pride.
You may have missed...
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Former General Shalikashvili: Repeal Don't Ask, Don't Tell [tr]
First Marine Wounded in Iraq Comes Out of the Closet [tr]
General Pace's Remarks Ignite National Debate on Gays in Military [tr]
More Gay Linguists Discharged Under 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' [tr]
Posted 2:32 PM EST by Andy Towle in Antonio Agnone, Brandon Juarez, Don't Ask, Don't Tell, Iraq, Military, News | Permalink
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they'll listen to brooks brothers moreso than gap.
Posted by: A.J. | Jun 6, 2007 9:22:30 PM
Eck. These guys are unattractive. They ought to have stayed in the closet. In fact all unattractive gay men should stay as far in the closet as possible. With the lights off.
Posted by: tony the tiger | Jun 6, 2007 10:16:49 PM
Ugh, why do gay men who were closeted and married to women NEVER miss an opportunity to tell every gay man they know that they were once married to a woman; and usually within the first five minutes of a conversation even when the information has nothing to do with the discussion at hand?
It's like a medal on their chest or a badge of honor. I just don't get it.
Posted by: Zeke | Jun 6, 2007 11:01:18 PM
Exactly AJ
Good point zeke
Posted by: anon | Jun 6, 2007 11:09:19 PM
Oh and Lt. Agnone, HOO RAH devil dog, Semper Fi my brother!
Pay no mind to complaints about your speach or your choice of clothing. You can put money on it that those who are doing the complaining wouldn't have the balls to do what you did in Iraq and they most likely have never done a damned thing, other than bitch in the comments section of a blog, to promote GLBT rights.
Rock on brother!
Posted by: Zeke | Jun 6, 2007 11:13:00 PM
Anxiety over homosexual masculinity is precisely what this whole mess is about. Why the concern over Agnone's "fey" manner? Sure it's disappointing but does it matter? The U.S. Military believes homosexual soldiers are gushing, prancing, weak, disruptive, sexually addicted predators who compromise "group cohesion" whether at school, home or war. Apparently a lot of "Gay" guys agree with them...unless the soldier is really hot.
Obsessing over Agnone's affected manner, "Gay" accent and clothing obscures the real issue and embraces the very same hostile stance of the Military.
Posted by: Ben D. | Jun 6, 2007 11:59:56 PM
zeke true BUT
Per the US census bureau the majority of american voters are white, straight, and between the ages of 45-75
Gap shirts do not impress that demographic.
Now if your intent is to get a bunch of e-mails asking for a date then ok, but if you are trying to alter the perception of gay men in the millitary then you better dress up to impress VOTERS.
The goal is to get voters behind you not dates.
Posted by: anon | Jun 7, 2007 1:22:59 AM
Actually Leland you IGNORANCE and Lies are legendary...where the hell do you get YOUR facts you flamer 36 years ago?!!!! Half a BILLION of dollars?
You must keep pulling your facts out of your fellow BUTT MONKEY and bare=backing arse wipe ANDREW SULLIVAN.
Sorry you have such a problem with HRC..look you are a one man band who is more comfortable with playing with yourself or perhaps in grass roots organizing (at the most)
but you are nonetheless bitter and NOTHING LESS THAN THE disintegration of HRC could possibly get you hard or make you happy.
PATHETIC..grind you axe but get updated facts and move on.
Posted by: MCnNYC | Jun 7, 2007 10:48:29 AM
It's funny that the Party that likes to think of itself as being the most in tune with our military should understand so little about unit cohesion and troop morale.
But again, consider how many Republicans have ever actually served their country in war. Not many.
Marines in particular are held together by a passionate commitment to serve and protect each other. They fight for their country because they must. But they really fight for the marines next to them. I've never been in the military, and yet I know this. I know this because I have had friends who did.
Straight marines who fight alongside gay marines do not see their sexual orientation, and they sure as hell have other things to worry about then whether the gay guy is looking at their winky in the shower. These men put their lives on the line for each other regardless of sexual orientation. They will die for their brother in arms, regardless of his sexual orientation.
But I wouldn't expect the bunch of white privileged corporate types who run the Republican Party to understand that.
Posted by: mark m | Jun 7, 2007 10:50:30 AM
That's just a real pisser that any gay person commenting here would take a potshot at Mr. Agnone's mannerisms, which (and I work with public speakers on a regular basis) to me, just looked and sounded like a kid talking to a teleprompter for the first time in his life. The only thing he needs is a style coach and someone to help him emphasize his points a bit more clearly.
He's done more with one video clip than most of you will do in a lifetime. If you're such experts, get off your ass, out from behind the keyboard and go DO something for a change.
By the way, if you hadn't noticed, Mitt Romney wears a suit, John McCain wears a suit, Giuliani wears a dress...just to mention a few formal-wearing douchebags.
Posted by: FizziekruntNT | Jun 7, 2007 11:54:13 AM
Mr. Agnone should be dressed to convey his respect for the people he wants to take him seriously, and to show that he is dealing with an important issue. His mannerisms are his mannerisms - he's a gay man and comes across as a sincere individual, not someone putting on a butch act.
Thank you Antonio for speaking up for the rest of us.
Posted by: dave | Jun 7, 2007 12:51:35 PM
Mr. Agnone's tone of voice is his own. And that's good enough foe me.
If speaking in a whiny, high-pitched tone of voice is an indicator of gayness, then I have good news. Half the "straight white male" voters you want to court are already gay.
And following this line of "logic", the entire male populations of Spain, Portugal, Italy, Sweden, and the Netherlands are gay too...as these are all languages where proper pronounciation requires you to have a lisp.
Posted by: John | Jun 7, 2007 1:45:02 PM
Come on folks he wears what he wants to wear ===he has earned that right AND to walk, talk and stand in front of that sign with PRIDE LELAND.... 36 years -kiss my butt you moron...it was founded in 1980 you screwball
Posted by: MCnNYC | Jun 7, 2007 3:38:15 PM
MCNNYC
Then why not wear a sarong? Obviously their are limits. Why?
Hell, screw the voters who put the politicians in office. We don't need to get them behind us. Unless you are willing to start a revolution and physicaly take over the government then you need play by the rules. The game sucks, but you have to play it.
Majority of voters 45-75 means they will listen more to a man in a suit than a man in a gap shirt. bet your bottom dollar that the opisition will be wearing suits and impressing the elderly voters who we need on our side.
Posted by: anon | Jun 7, 2007 4:18:21 PM
What's so offensive about shopping at the GAP (other than the fact that they use sweatshops)? He's wearing a dress shirt, isn't he? He doesn't look like a freak, does he?
It's not as if Antonio's doing his impression of Howard Stern or Larry Flynt. And military men don't exactly dress up like Wall Street bankers when they're off-duty.
Bottom line. The people who are open to the message will forgive minor imperfections in dress and mannerisms. The people who are bigots are not going to listen to the "fag" regardless of how he dresses. Doesn't matter if it's an Armani suit or Walmart t-shirt.
Call me crazy, but I also doubt the average voter cares whether Nancy's Pelosi's Italian-designed scarves are more expensive than George W. Bush's cowboy hats. They probably are, but who outside of New York, Washington DC, and California give a rat's behind about that?
Posted by: John | Jun 8, 2007 12:55:00 AM
For everyone who complained that Antonio Agnone doesn't look serious or tough enough:
He is not an actor and not really trained for public speaking. When one is a bit nervous, one, naturally, would look vulnerable. The fact that he is willing to do this AND not afraid to expose his vulnerability is really, really admirable.
Every man who judge him based on his shirt or his slightly nervous state should audition to become a drag queen or the Pope. They both have similar job descriptions: To wear a dress and judge poeple.......Who wants to apply first?
Posted by: AVI | Jun 10, 2007 9:56:27 PM
a) it a choice
b) its immoral
c) your are making a bad impression on our children
joining the military that is
i fully support gay rights in every thing else but we should be making as hard as possible for any one to join our overseas murders
Posted by: paul bass | Nov 7, 2009 10:02:04 AM