1. David D. says

    “It has nothing to do with being gay. It has to do with … you made a choice in your life and you’re married, and it would turn your life into a fraud.”

    Gee, it sounds just like what a regretful closeted gay TV star would say if he was urged into a show marriage for the good of his career.

  2. Michael W. says

    Rita should have asked at that point if he ever regretted choosing to be straight and are there moments when he wishes he had decided to be gay…

  3. Strepsi says

    That’s the way I understood it too.

    That said, it’s not just wishful thinking.

    I also disagree with MUSTO (and many gay advocates) that we must predicate our equality be claiming it’s NOT a choice. I realize it can help, especially in relation to other civil rights movements, but frankly, I demand equality even if I CHOOSE TO BE GAY.

    I mean, we have had 60 years of coming to terms with Jewish rights and the Holocaust, and it’s just a religion. No one is claiming that Judaism is genetic. You can even convert! Similarly, I do not hear Christians thinking they deserve less equality because of their “lifestyle” choice. No, I think many people are fluid enough to CHOOSE to be straight OR gay, but that neither choice should limit their rights.

    And with people genetically creating designer babies now, having a gay “gene” that can be programmed out is possible in the future — so our reliance on the genetic “excuse” for equalityy could bite us in the ass.

    I say LET ME CHOOSE, and GIVE ME EQUALITY whichever choice I make! And, let me CONVERT as many people along the way as I can! 😉

  4. secretagentman says

    Since I’ve been a gossipy bitch from birth, I do recall a minor ‘incident’ back during Magnum. Seems a very young man crashed Mr Sellecks jeep in Hawaii and Mr Selleck said he was the stepson of the woman he was currently seeing. uh huh. Shortly after that he was engaged to his present wife.

  5. Mark says

    I saw the interview on Sunday morning — and all I took from the “choice” line was that he was referring to his choice to enter into, and stay in, his marriage, it didn’t feel like a closeted gay moment at all.

  6. philberto says

    Another has been who is trying to revive a career that died quite a few years back. If life is about choices I think he made the wrong ones. Does anyone today care what Tom Selleck thinks today? All I can say is “Tom who?”

  7. JR says

    OK, don’t hate me for this, but it could also be that he misspoke. If your ‘choice’ is to get married to a woman, THAT in fact is a choice. If you’re gay and ‘choose’ to marry a woman for the purposes of purporting legitimacy, THAT is also a ‘choice’. And yes, coming out after making those choices would in fact turn your existing life into a fraud. I don’t think that the ‘choice’ he is referring to here is about sexuality. It seems to refer to other things in life that you can actually make choices on. Context, people.

    How’s that for a post that overuses the word ‘choice’? I feel like Jeff Spicoli. :)

  8. Cameron Johnson says

    Sounds like the choice he made was to marry, not to be straight, and that the magazine’s insinuation that he was gay made people perceive his life as fraudulent.

    Thus, to restore his integrity (The article not only implied that he was gay, but also a liar), he sued the magazine and won an apology.

    Why is this news?

  9. TPL says

    I have to agree with Mark and Jr here. He’s referring to the choice he made to get married. And when sleazy, gossipy tabloids lie and say you are something you are not, then that hurts people.
    Come on, guys. I think there are other people out there who’s words we should be much more concerned with. Sally Kern? Chris Buttars?

  10. Lisa says

    @ secretagentman

    It really was his step-son. Even though he divorced his first wife, he claimed the boy as his own and still does. My mother was totally in love with him, therefore my trivia brain has an entire Selleck section.

  11. Bruce Fairman says

    I lived in Portland, Maine from 1978 until 1982. I came out in 1978 and sometime that year or in 1979, I befriended a man who lived in a large modern home on Lake Sebago. My friend stayed in an in-law type apartment, and the rest of the house was occupied by the owner, a man in his 50’s or 60’s, his son, his daughter (who had an infant) and his boyfriend, Tom Selleck. They entertained frequently and the times I was there the other guests were almost exclusively gay men. This was before Magnum, but we were all impressed by Tom’s appearances in television shows and modelling photographs that were hung around the house. He was friendly, charming and always active in doing work around the house. A few times he asked me to help him with some things that required a second hand. He and his partner also came into Portland to dance at the local gay dance club called “The Phoenix. When he succeded in his lawsuit I was shocked that the tabloids defense hadn’t dug up any of this information. He may not be gay but he did an outstanding job acting that role back in Maine.

  12. Bojo says

    Being from Olney, Maryland…Mr. Selleck spent much time while growing up and had a home for many year in Sandy Spring. He built a house for his Mother next door to his humongous mansion on MD RT 108. Ms. Tom was WELL known in the GLBT community as a closet-case and conservative Republican never really fitting in with the Quaker communities which populate the area.

  13. tony the tiger says

    I always got a totally gay vibe from Tom Selleck.

    And strangely enough there are gay friends of mine now passed away who swore Tom lived in Oregon and had a long term boyfriend there which is what Bruce is attesting to.

    I think that just like John Travolta he is a gay man who opted for a straight (or mostly straight) lifestyle who jumped at the opportunity to play gay in a movie.

  14. David says

    He also gave an interview to the New York Native, the gay rag of the moment in NYC in the early and mid-80’s, where he spoke about relationships that he had had without ever identifying his lovers’ gender. The only other celebrities that gave interviews to the New York Native were Jack Wrangler and other openly gay men, so just his giving the interview was something of a give away. But the language he used so clearly exposed him as a closet case, it was really somewhat pathetic. I’ve never heard a straight man talk about getting married in terms of having made a “choice” that somehow the insinuation of being gay would sully. A straight man would just say, I’m straight and I don’t like it when people spread misinformation about me. Seems like a closet case’s slip to me.

  15. says

    @ STREPSI: I totally agree with you on the Choice thing. Who cares why, it’s not important. Being gay is good (though not necessarily better). Doesn’t matter why, other than curiosity. Most people don’t have CONTROL over their sexuality, but some people do shift over time and perhaps some can choose, but I don’t think many.

    But again, being gay is amoral, it’s just part of the natural world.

  16. Garst says

    Maybe he did “chose” to live as a straight man. Would it be too hard to believe that a closeted bisexual man just to chose live a life of a straight man to keep himself away from the crap bi men have to put up with.

  17. nic says

    jeebus, i never liked this guy. he is looking more and more like a basset hound.

    this opinion is founded on hearsay, but back in the 70’s, a friend saw him at a gay pool party having a gay old time.

  18. Steve says

    Um, this is such a non-issue that I feel the need to comment.

    Let. It. Rest. Don’t we have “real” things to think and talk about?

    Love the site….

  19. says

    Dispite all that I read here, I still like Tom Selleck. People should look more at what someone does instead of what someone doesn’t. So what if his career is at an end? At least he had one!
    Although I do not agree with many of his viewpoints – might have something to do with me being dutch/german/french mixed and thus have a hard time understanding republican Americans!- I still like that he stands for what he thinks and believes.

    I did draw him into one of my comicbook stories, he plays a general in it.

  20. Eikin Kloster says

    @DAVID R.
    “But again, being gay is amoral, it’s just part of the natural world.”

    Then again being a part of the nature world doesn’t grant you moral neutrality, since ANYTHING that is not supernatural is part of the natural world, including mass murder.

    Other than that, I fully agree with your comment

  21. wondering? says

    Do you think a married man that seems to have “man crushes”one of which is on Tom Selleck. by which I mean really loves his shows esp Magnum. Could he be gay??? There were other clues & he seems to think you can make a choice to not act on being gay.

  22. Matt Phelan says

    What a load of crap! Being gay or straight isn’t a choice; you can’t choose who you are attracted to. Tom has been a married man for most of his life. Just because his first marriage didn’t work out doesn’t mean that he’s gsy. So Alec Baldwin is automatically gay because his marriage to Kim Basinger-one of the world’s most beautiful women-ended in divorce? Gimme a break. As a journalist, let me give you some advice: DON’T BELIEVE EVERYTHING YOU READ. Jeez….

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