Report: Malawi Couple Break Up — Monjeza to Marry a Woman

A sad state of affairs in Malawi. This is what must apparently happen for these men to survive.

Nyasa Times reports:

"Steven Monjeza has dumped Tiwonge Chimbalanga –Aunt Tiwo- who he engaged in the first Malawi gay ceremony that earned them a 14 years imprisonment for homosexuality.

They were pardoned by President Bingu wa Mutharika after conceding international pressure.

But according to The Nation newspaper, Malawi’s authoritative daily; Monjeza has found a woman, Dorothy Gulo, 24, to marry and claims he was forced into the ‘gay drama’.

The man has said he will expose the people that allegedly forced him into the gay act if they continue to pester him.

The paper reports that Monjeza alleges that he never had sex with his fellow man, Tiwonge."

Monjeza claims he was forced to hold a news conference: "We were pardoned but I know the law can bounce back on us if we are not careful. Although I claimed that I still love Tiwo, I did not mean it. I have never had sex with him as was revealed in court. That is why the medical examination failed to establish any anal penetration. I was coerced into the whole thing,@ The Nation quoted him.  They forcefully picked me from my house in Kameza when I was drunk. They bundled me into their car and said they were taking me for a drink. Indeed, I was treated to a drinking orgy throughout the journey but no one revealed where we were going until I reached a house in Lilongwe to find Tiwo.  He told me that there are many countries willing to take us but I told him I was not interested and would not go."

The Africa Review: "In dramatic turn of events, one of Malawi's pardoned gays Steven Monjeza has renounced his love for Tiwonge Chimbalanga and has since opted to marry a woman, Ms Dorothy Gulo, barely 10 days after being pardoned."

(via box turtle bulletin)


  1. Bob says

    I called NAACP several times wondering when they were going to make an announcement. Believe it or not — the PR person I spoke to said she “never heard about it.”

    It would be funny if it wasn’t so sad.

    I sent her news clips from the New York Times, and never heard a word after follow-up calls or emails. Maybe if more people called and asked for some kind of … well, leadership?

    The PR person I spoke to was Erica Lewis —
    Erica Lewis: 202.463.2940;

  2. Brian in Texas says

    This is disheartening, but these men have limited options in how to conduct themselves if they plan on staying in Malawi. All eyes are on them and their lives may be at stake.

    This story made international news obviously but its not mainstream to Americans; especially those that don’t visit gay or progressive blogs. It’s not surprising that the PR person at the NAACP did not hear of the story. They are primarily an American civil rights organization. It’s really not their mission to be the international police of every civil rights injustice in the world.

  3. FizziekruntNT says

    May Tiwonge Chimbalanga find happiness in another country in the arms of another not so easily swayed and may Steven Monjeza find his own happiness, even if it is locked in the cage of his own homeland. Very sad.

  4. says

    What Fizzie said.

    What a pathetic story. This reminds me of the experiences of gay men back before Stonewall… and why we still often identify with torch singers crooning about the pathos and heartbreak associated with loving a man who can never truly be ours:

    “Oh my man, I love him so
    He’ll never know
    All my life is just despair
    But I don’t care
    When he takes me in his arms
    The world is bright
    All right…
    What’s the difference if I say I’ll go away
    When I know I’ll come back on my knees someday
    For whatever my man is
    I am his

    If those lyrics don’t speak of a situation similar to this one, then I’m a straight married father of twelve from Scarsdale.

    Maybe one of the reasons why the story of Tiwo and Stephen have struck such a nerve among the American GLBT community is the knowledge that their story could have easily been our own if only we had been born just a titch earlier.

  5. romeo says

    Not surprising given their circumstances. Same sort of thing still happens here. America is scary, but nothing like where these boys are having to make their lives. It should be interesting to see how it plays out.

  6. says

    Can you blame him? I would probably do the same thing. I’m 100% gay but I would lie my ass off if it meant trying to rebuild some semblance of a life after this horrific ordeal. One can only take so much. Still, my heart breaks for them as it is just so difficult for the LGBT community there. I hope they are able to remain safe at the very least.

  7. rjp3 says

    Very sad — obviously he is lying to
    stay alive in a the religious theocracy
    that he is suffering under.

    It is amazing to me that each night people
    on cable new promote a religious theocracy
    for America and are not ruined in public opinion.

    This is what happens under religious theocracy.

    (Side note — a hero would not recant. This betrayal of who he is makes him nothing but a victim to feel sorrow for.)

  8. jack says


    get real. NAACP knows full well about the story. they had been questioned about possibly lending support weeks ago, but chose to remain deafeningly silent. the NAACP, especially under its new leadership, is a VERY socially conservation, read homophobic, organization. julien bond and the few other vocal supporters have4 been completely marginalized. i doubt you will ever get a comment from them, on this or any other gay civil rights issue.

  9. Strepsi says

    This is not just a theocracy, it’s the effing Inquisition all over again. Look at the “history of excuses” this poor man has been forced to trot out, familiar from here in North America over the last century:
    “I was drunk”
    “I was forced”
    “I was lying under media pressure”
    “We didn’t really have sex”
    “The medical examination showed no penetration”

    Medical exam?!!!
    It’s the effing Inquisition.

  10. randalf says

    It is truly a sad situation for these homosexuals? May the sweet Auntie Tiwo find true love. Thanks for the lyrics to My Man . . . maybe Madonna can record it for the Malawiian people as a way to bring recognition to the cause. And what is up with you queens and the NAACP? They represent the Colored People of America – why drag their conservative asses into this?

  11. john says

    SAD. To decide that it is best to BLAME the man he was with, and they WERE together, and accuse him and a “pesky group” of people for kidnapping him and forcing him into this? I felt horrible for this couple, now I just feel horrible for Tiwo who not only lost his man and his love but that he turned on him and said it was all a lie just to save his own ass?…i just don’t know.

  12. BadStuff says

    I don’t think anything of the NAACP, but it’s affair expecting them to speak on this. I think they’re only supposed to be involved in U.S. causes. (Someone can correct me if I’m wrong). Watch the disturbing documentary on HBO-on-Demand about Nigerian children being accused of witchcraft. If the NAACP or other American groups don’t comment on that, they’re certainly not going to get into the Malawi situation.

  13. missanthrope says

    Why are people still reffering to Tiwonge as a “man” when she has repeatedly identified herself as female? Selective memory anyone?

  14. TylerAnthony says

    After reading about this whole situation. I look back a many gay men in America, who take being gay for granted. Who would rather just have quickies than take a chance and love someone of the same sex(and I’m not talking about friends) How many men continue to have anonymous sex with strangers or say it’s easier to jerk off to porn than get to know someone. Many gay men in America busted out of the closet just to enter into a dirtier hypocritical one.

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