Evan Flanary, Gay SF Man Reported Missing, is Found Safe


Evan Flanary, a SF man who went missing this weekend, has been found safe after his mother and police launched a manhunt that took off on the web late yesterday.

Mission Local reports:

Berlingeri posted on her Facebook wall tonight: “He was SO SO SO apologetic that he worried about us. He had met a person, they hit it off fabulously, they were down town enjoying all the week’s festivities. The battery in his cell phone died and although he had a charger, it just wouldn’t take the charge. He never noticed the flyers but today he saw his image on a television screen and could NOT believe it.”

Flanary’s mother also posted a photo of her son taken today.

Flanary had been missing since June 19.

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  1. lol - That has to be one of the most embarassing hook ups ever. My Mom would do the same though - call your family.

    Posted by: Erich | Jun 26, 2012 9:49:59 AM

  2. Wow, some of you guys are so cynical and judgmental. Also, why is "bottom" being used as an epithet?

    Posted by: Johnson | Jun 26, 2012 9:51:29 AM

  3. Agree with Tanoka. If he had been found like Matthew Shephard, people could not stop crying. He's alive and he's a crack addicted big bottom.

    I'm just mad at him he couldn't have called ANYONE in a week. A week!

    Posted by: MarkUs | Jun 26, 2012 9:53:20 AM

  4. Tanoka and Markus--right on.

    Posted by: Jeff Kurtti | Jun 26, 2012 9:54:55 AM

  5. "bottom" is not being used as an epithet here. "twacked out bareback twink bottom" is.

    Posted by: Reader | Jun 26, 2012 9:56:18 AM

  6. @Tanoka - absolutely.

    And a general reminder, call your mother while you still can.

    Posted by: Alan | Jun 26, 2012 9:58:53 AM

  7. Wow... an attractive, thin guy steps out for a week during Pride and suddenly he's a barebacking twink meth power bottom? Talk about sour grapes syndrome.... and we wonder why young guys don't want to hang out with anyone over 30. Bitter much?

    Imagine the bitchy comments that would follow if your picture ended up on this site. Leave the kid (and his overprotective mom) alone and be thankful he didn't end up like the lesbians in Texas.

    Posted by: AJM | Jun 26, 2012 10:28:45 AM

  8. Its great he was found safe - I was afraid he wasn't going to be found at all or found in the woods somewhere five months from now. However, he put his family and to a lesser extent the SF gay community through the ringer because he was too inconsiderate to call home for a whole week or keep his cell charged. I know the article said his charge wasn't working - but there are still landlines in bars and stores and people's houses. He also could have asked to borrow someone else's phone. It was just pure inconsideration on his part.

    Posted by: KP | Jun 26, 2012 10:33:23 AM

  9. Not calling anyone in a six day period would be impossible for most anyone I know. Does he not work or go to school? I don't care how much fun you're having, this story is definitely BS and it's got meth written all over it.

    Posted by: MrJ | Jun 26, 2012 10:38:02 AM

  10. I have to agree with the people defending his mother here. If I fell off the face of the Earth for a week, not only would my mom be calling the police, but so would my friends, co-workers and the rest of my family. And rightfully so...

    It was a truly punk/selfish thing to do. And he was not just "enjoying the festivities," sounds like a drug bender to me.

    Posted by: BEAHBEAH | Jun 26, 2012 10:47:07 AM

  11. There was no internet; no social media; no cell phones when I was his age. I was home from college and met a guy at a bar and went home with him. The next morning his phone rang. He answered it then handed it to me saying; "It's your mother." She matter-of-factly told me that the dean from college was trying to get ahold of me to offer me a graduate assistantship. To this day I have no idea how she tracked me down.

    Posted by: Bill | Jun 26, 2012 10:51:00 AM

  12. Maybe I don't get it because I'm a thin, white male... but is everything always about being a thin, white male?

    I think I'm pretty aware and interested in the equality struggles and realities of all types of people and individuals within my group of friends. But I'm incredibly annoyed when the reaction to this story is "whew, a hot white guy was found safe and sound."

    Does being the social majority within a minority negate me from being respected and included within my minority?

    Posted by: Jeremy | Jun 26, 2012 11:03:01 AM

  13. you cannot tell me that his race, age, looks, class did not play a very large part in how this played out in terms of media coverage -
    imagine if he were 50, fat, poor and from someplace less shimmering than the bay area

    Posted by: jw | Jun 26, 2012 11:22:12 AM

  14. Moms....gotta love them.

    You live at home with mom, CALL HER/TEXT HER when you aren't coming home or are going to be away for awhile. Commonsense.

    Posted by: ratbastard | Jun 26, 2012 11:23:34 AM

  15. And I agree with others who say not contacting anyone for 6 days, and saying your cellphone died, is questionable. It does sound to me like he was on a bender of some kind. Just saying. Of course it's his business and my apologies if I helped spread an erroneous bad rumor.

    Posted by: ratbastard | Jun 26, 2012 11:26:31 AM

  16. @JW,

    I agree 100%. Just a simple fact of life, all are in fact not created equal. Youth, good looks, socio-economic status, even gender [pretty girls usually get far more attention when they get assaulted, go missing, etc.] play a huge role in determining whether you'll get your 15 minutes. As some wise person once noted, if Jesus Christ was ugly, old, obese, incontinent, instead of 'pretty' with beautiful long hair, would anyone have paid any attention to him and created the religion/cult known as Christianity? Of course not.

    Posted by: ratbastard | Jun 26, 2012 11:31:09 AM

  17. And I don't mean obese in a happy, Buddah sort of way.

    Posted by: ratbastard | Jun 26, 2012 11:33:06 AM

  18. Am I the only one who thought of that Canadian cannibal victim when this story first started?

    Nice to see one of these stories with a happy ending (several days of happy endings, apparently...).

    Posted by: tim b | Jun 26, 2012 12:29:25 PM

  19. I'm just glad he's OK. Just because he was incommunicado for several days I'm not going to assume or accuse him of a drug binge or anything else without evidence.

    But people need to THINK and be careful when they hook up with strangers. There's a reason why prostitutes and gay men are considered "easy pickings" by serial killers (and violent homophobes for that matter)- their willingness to go somewhere with strangers. Let people know where you are and who you're with, even if that just means sending an email to an account others have access to. Carry a weapon of some sort, even if it's just a Swiss Army Knife and all you ever use it for is the bottle opener. In short, don't be an idiot about getting laid!

    Posted by: Caliban | Jun 26, 2012 12:33:17 PM

  20. Amen Tanoka - Towlroad is a great site, but they have the most horrible, nasty commenters I've seen anywhere. It's a story with a happy ending, and the kid has a mom who obviously loves him. Take the good news for a change. :)

    Posted by: Cal | Jun 26, 2012 12:37:38 PM

  21. "As some wise person once noted, if Jesus Christ was ugly, old, obese, incontinent, instead of 'pretty' with beautiful long hair, would anyone have paid any attention to him and created the religion/cult known as Christianity?"

    That "wise person" had Jesus confused with Jeffrey Hunter. Try a handsome indigenous Palestinian...without any Ottoman inter-mixing.

    Posted by: Derrick from Philly | Jun 26, 2012 12:44:07 PM

  22. I'm glad dude is safe. And mom's worry seems on point to me. I figure the website was donated by some company and that they and not mom, are trying to make a buck off of it.

    I do wonder why this story took off though. Many mom's are out there trying to get attention to their missing children of all ages... http://www.blackandmissinginc.com/cdad/index.cfm

    Posted by: Anthony | Jun 26, 2012 12:49:29 PM

  23. @Derrick from Philly,

    You're deliberately confusing my point. As for what Jesus Christ the historical figure [if he really existed] physically looked like, he undoubtedly would have been Semitic [i.e. Arab, North African] looking. And actually Derrick, North Africans/Arabs/Persians can in fact be 'pretty' with long straight hair and even pale white skin.

    Posted by: ratbastard | Jun 26, 2012 12:57:52 PM

  24. The mother needs to relax. He doesn't call her for five days and she initiates a citywide manhunt!

    Posted by: Guy | Jun 26, 2012 3:36:48 PM

  25. @Bill: That's the best story ever. Awesome. :-)

    Posted by: Rob | Jun 26, 2012 4:05:04 PM

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