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De Blasio's Wife: Yes, I Was Once A Lesbian, But Not Anymore


This is an amazing flip-flop: Chirlane McCray, wife of likely Republican Democratic New York City mayoral candidate Bill de Blasio, was forced to release a statement yesterday admitting that, yes, she was a lesbian before she met her husband, currently the city's public advocate.

"[I] identified as a lesbian and wrote about it," she said after Hunter Walker at The Observer dug up a 1979 Essence magazine article Ms. McCray wrote called "I Am a Lesbian."

"I survived the tears, the isolation and the feeling that something was terribly wrong with me for loving another woman," she wrote. “Coming to terms with my life as a lesbian has been easier for me than it has been for many. Since I don’t look or dress like the typical bulldagger, I have a choice as to whether my sexual preference is known.”

Then, a sentence that she could never have known could complicate a future husband's political career: "I have also been fortunate because I discovered my preference for women early, before getting locked into a traditional marriage and having children.”

Reacting to the story yesterday, McCray said that meeting Bill in 1991 changed everything: "In 1991, I met the love of my life, married him, and together we’ve raised two amazing kids. I’m reminded every day how lucky I am to have met my soul mate."

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  1. The press made no mention of the Kinsey Scale. Perhaps Ms. McCray lies somewhere in between gay and straight on the scale. It doesn't really matter because she and her husband have been advocating for gay rights for years and are far more intelligent and progressive than Christine Quinn, who has sold her constituents (including the LGBT community) down the river whenever it has been politically expedient.

    Posted by: Donny Moss | Dec 6, 2012 2:27:30 PM

  2. At the time she used the term "bulldagger" she was a Lesbian (a bisexual one we know now). Lesbians are allowed to use the term "bulldagger" just like Gay men are allowed to use the term "f.ggot". Just like Black folks are allowed to use the n-word. Just like Southerners are allowed to use "redneck". Just like....and on and on and on.

    I have an old OLD friend who still uses the term "fish" for women. I told him to stop...about 1,000 times now.

    Posted by: Derrick from Philly | Dec 6, 2012 2:40:41 PM

  3. Since Mrs. De Blasio hasn't claimed that she is no longer attracted to women I can only guess that she still has her old attractions and therefore isn't really "straight" despite being married to a man. Why can't she just say that she is proud to be a bisexual woman? More and more women are coming out as bisexual every day.

    Posted by: Mary | Dec 6, 2012 3:29:19 PM

  4. my best friend's sister-in-law makes $84/hr on the laptop. She has been laid off for 9 months but last month her pay check was $14706 just working on the laptop for a few hours. Read more here www.Tips15.US

    Posted by: cateblanchettc | Dec 6, 2012 4:01:04 PM

  5. How can a New York-based journalist not know that Bill de Blasio is a Democrat? He lives in Park Slope!

    Posted by: baffled | Dec 6, 2012 4:40:44 PM

  6. What she wrote in response was really strange and creates more questions than answers, when the answer could have been very simple.

    She could have just said she's bisexual, and it would have been 'problem solved.'

    Either way, it's her life, she can do whatever she wants to do. I won't get upset about this sort of thing, so long as she doesn't advocate any crazy 'ex-gay' therapy, and she's thankfully not doing that here.

    Posted by: R | Dec 6, 2012 4:45:12 PM

  7. If Ms. McCray identified as a lesbian 30 years ago and now she doesn’t, that’s her business. It would become our business if she were promoting ex-gay therapies or saying Jesus turned her straight or proselytizing on how much better her life is now that she’s no longer a lesbian or supporting anti-gay legislature with her husband, because all of that is hypocrisy and detrimental to a large segment of the population.

    That’s not what’s going on here. She and her husband are both liberals who supported gay marriage in New York state. Her own wedding was presided over by two gay ministers.

    Whether she identifies as gay or straight or bisexual is really no concern of mine because she and her husband continue to fight the good fight and stand on the side of equality. How or why their relationship works should matter to two people - Chirlaine McCray and Bill de Blasio. Everyone else can have a seat.

    Posted by: RafiD'Angelo | Dec 6, 2012 5:08:05 PM

  8. There is nothing ex-gay here. She liked women, self-identified as a lesbian, and then realized that her preference was broader than just gay or straight. That she is with a man now does not change her orientation. She is a bisexual woman. Good for her for recognizing that she is free to decide who she wants to love.

    Posted by: Bill | Dec 7, 2012 8:07:31 AM

  9. I expect she's more interested in power than pussy.

    Posted by: John Conolley | Dec 7, 2012 12:15:54 PM

  10. When I was in the military we termed it a marriage of convenience. Repug or Dixiecrat, looks like Bi's managed to find one another.

    Posted by: DC Arnold | Dec 8, 2012 8:03:12 PM

  11. Tom In Long Beach, I think you are actually WRONG. There might be SOME women (and men as a matter of fact) who probably do find their sexuality to be fluid. But MOST men and women, especially gay women would find that idea to be very insulting and wrong. For MANY people there is NOTHING fluid about their orientation, and nothing will ever change them. They are who they are and are hard-wired (born) that way. I know LOT'S of gay women who find the idea of being with a man sexually to be repulsive (no offence to anyone here) and they KNOW that nothing about that will change.

    Posted by: Cora | Nov 13, 2013 1:35:24 PM

  12. Hugh, I know quite a few gay men who are opened to the idea of fluid sexuality among people. Although I would say MOST people are not fluid, and that's why many people (including gay women actually) find the idea of fluidity to be insulting.

    Posted by: Cora | Nov 13, 2013 1:39:57 PM

  13. Mary, LOT'S of men are coming out as bi these days too. :)

    Posted by: Cora | Nov 13, 2013 1:40:41 PM

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