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Kesha is “sick of pretending everything is all good”.
The 36-year-old singer / songwriter – who sued music producer Lukasz Gottwald in 2014 in a bid to get out of her recording contracts after accusing him of sexual assault and battery, while he subsequently filed a countersuit for defamation – admitted that there are days when she struggles and she doesn't want to fake being fine.
She told The Guardian newspaper: “Sometimes I'm incredibly happy, and then sometimes I have panic attacks. That's the truth. I've been so sick of pretending everything is all good.”
Gottwald's – who is also known as Dr. Luke – long-running defamation lawsuit against Kesha will go to trial in July and she admitted that there is a “lot of fear” about the future.
She said: “I have a big year coming up. There's a lot of fear. Happiness is always going to be my goal and something I'm working towards. I have a beautiful family and a bunch of gorgeous cats, and that makes me happy. I have wonderful friends. But I'm in a lot of emotional pain. The whole point of this [new] album is: ‘Some things are not OK, and I've been through some stuff that is not OK.'”
Kesha worked with producer Rick Rubin on her upcoming album ‘Gag Order' and she revealed it was an emotional experience.
She said: “I would walk in every day and for approximately two hours I would cry and he would just create space. He never once asked me to stop crying, or to get it together. It just took me a minute to put a voice to these really unpleasant, embarrassing emotions. I don't want to be seen as weak, or f***** up, or unhappy, because overall in my life … I have all the emotions.”
