Sex and the City: The Interview


GuestbloggerHope you’re all enjoying the holiday weekend. We thought we’d bring you something a bit different today and at the same time do our part to add to the overkill media machine propelling the most important movie ever made toward its premiere at the end of the month.

Towleroad correspondents Josh Helmin and Josh Koll (Josh & Josh are Rich and Famous) sat down with the cast of Sex and the City recently at the Ritz Carlton Hotel in New York for exclusive chats about the show’s gay fans, plotlines that never made it to the show, Sex-y fashion, and what it was like to return to their characters’ (high-heeled) shoes for Sex and the City: The Movie. Here’s what transpired:


CYNTHIA NIXON: In the first couple years of our show we didn’t have any female writers. Our two writers were gay men. There was a lot said about, “These aren’t really women—these are gay men disguised as women,” and that really bugged all of us. It was like, Why aren’t they really women? Because women aren’t having this much sex? That’s annoying.

It’s a very gay friendly show. Not only do we have gay characters, but one of the central themes is a very gay conceit, which is your family is not the family you came from. Your family [develops] when you come to a place you always wanted to be and you meet people who are like you, and you create your own family. You notice in the series that we almost never meet anybody’s family. Once we met Charlotte’s brother. We heard about Miranda’s father after he was dead. But we never meet anybody’s parents or family. And they really wanted to keep it about the family you create.

SARAH JESSICA PARKER: Because I’m from New York, and I was raised in the theater, the gay community was always part of culture to me. They were always some of the first audiences, always the first people at the preview of a Broadway show, so it wasn’t so shocking to me that they were some of the first, most committed audiences [of our show].

There was a particular attachment to this show, among even my gay friends. It’s less about the salty dialogue and the candid, forthright chat-chat. Your relationship with your gay friends is like your relationships with your straight women friends. It is that deep and that intense and they care about friendships in the same way; they talk and they share. That has been my relationship with gay men, and, of course, the majority of my friends are gay men. And it’s extremely comforting: They always make you feel good, they always make you feel at even your worst moments like a lady—like a girl—and they are never afraid to be honest. They loved the ridiculousness and the absurd and the dirty and costumes, but if there wasn’t an emotional connection to those friendships and what they meant—you know, the gay community can grow weary, and they can move on quickly. But I think that’s what it meant for [the gay community], that kind of connection.

KIM CATTRALL: A lot of people ask me if they feel that I’m playing a gay man in New York, and if I am, I am having the most fabulous time as a gay man in New York. I don’t personally think that, but I think it’s a fun thought. I was very happy to be on the cover of The Advocate. I feel like I have arrived in some ways. But there has been a tremendous amount of support from the gay community, and I’m grateful for it.

KRISTEN DAVIS: We have been hugely supported by the gay community, absolutely, and we love that. I feel like we’ve got support from a lot of different groups, which I think was edifying to us. I think people in general identify with well-written characters.

But I think also for gay culture—men and women—we were not locked into anything particularly rigid—there’s Samantha and Charlotte and everything in between. It’s colorful and pretty to look at, and we’ve got crazy clothes, and it was risky in a way, and with sexuality, and I think that people felt free about that, and so of course the gay community would vibe with it. But also, when I go home to South Carolina, old women come up to me, and I say, “Really, you watch it? You don’t have heart palpitations?” So it’s been a really good cross section. But we love our gay fans, obviously.

NEXT: Back in their characters’ shoes


  1. says

    There is still no force on Earth that is going to get me to the theater to see this movie.

    I am TRULY pleased that these four women have been able to garner a greater career from this show.

  2. Justin says

    Bravo on the interview, J&J!

    And to my fellow commenters – enough with the venom! Didn’t you ever learn, “if you don’t have something nice to say…?”

  3. Will says

    Yes, Justin, but if you don’t have something nice to say, then come sit by me.

    Personally, I’ll wait for the DVD. I hated the last few seasons of the show, so I hardly think I’m going to enjoy the follow-up.

  4. scar2 says

    I can’t wait for the movie. I wasn’t happy with the way it ended 4 years ago. They all ended up happy & found the right men. I thought, with the exception of Charlotte, they were independent women who didn’t need a man to make them happy? I’m glad the film will deal with what happens after ‘happily ever after.’

  5. lodenmuse says

    Yes, the last couple seasons were going down in flames (the ones in which SJP had more control producing). Nice to know, from her lips, the other reason the early episodes were so much better.


  6. says

    Ugh! I’m SO sick of this show now. Loved it when it was on, but didn’t realize what it would reap upon this great city. A bunch of girls from the hinterlands moving to the city thinking they could live exactly like these girls on TV. Well, that ain’t New York, ladies! Sadly, that influx of girls (and equally simpy gay men) have ruined this city for a very long time. Let’s get back to the REAL sex and the city, please!

  7. ggreen says

    Lets face it if not for this show and Will and Grace 75% of gays, would have no way to know how to act. The “TV gays” watch these shows and believe they know the characters and the actors that play them personally and are their friends. They also emulate them in speech, ideology and morals. If these women told gay men to cut their dicks off many would consider it.

  8. will says

    Seriously, it’s Kristin. Please please please change. It’s disrespectful and unprofessional to interview someone and then spell their name incorrectly.

  9. jason says

    Sex And The City is not remotely gay-friendly. What you have here is producers and writers and actresses using the gay community to build a power base. Female entertainers like Madonna have done this before.

    Is there a male-male relationship depicted in Sex And The City? No. Is there a male-male kiss depicted in Sex And The City? Absolutely not. Still think this is a gay-friendly movie????

    We in the gay community really need to stop being dysfunctional in the way we devote our attention (and finances) to people who really do nothing to help our gay rights cause. We have become enablers of the heterosexual male fantasy by propping up these women, women who are extremely vain and desperate to tailor themselves for the purpose of attracting male heterosexual attention. Let’s not do it. Time for us to grow up. Time to stop the enabling.

  10. brad says

    true enough about the maybe-not-so-gay-friendly bit. carrie’s friend and charlotte’s friend were broadly drawn queens, which is fine, nothing against effeminate gay men, but if we really understood what “gay friendly” or “gay positive” meant, maybe we wouldn’t be so quick to hold this show up as these things.

    still can’t wait.

  11. says

    Ggreen, or maybe TV is telling people who are naturally prone to acting in the “stereotypical” way that it’s actually okay and you can still have friends and be loved by your family.

    Not every gay man has to be “straight acting”.

  12. ggreen says

    If living down to gay stereotypes were the answer there would be less bitching and little need for Vodka in the gay community. Why do people need to “act” at all (straight or otherwise). I find “straight acting” gays just as offensive as lady-like acting gays. Just be yourself if people don’t like you tough.

  13. John in Manhattan says

    I’ve never seen an episode of SEX IN THE CITY but I have seen the trailer for the film (who hasn’t?). Mario Cantone gives me hives. Tell me if I’m wrong, but I’m guessing his character is another minstrel performance from the sexless Cantone. Gays are non-threatening as long as they’re celibate and make straight people laugh with all that hilarious mincing. So much for gay friendly.

  14. says

    Jason: Carrie’s best gay friend, Stanford, was in a long-term relationship throughout the last couple of seasons of the show. Not only was there plenty of male-male kissing, there was even a plot twist involving a male-male BJ!

  15. another matt says

    I loved this show when it on, thought it was extremely clever and well-written even though I hate ‘Carrie Bradshaw’ who I’m convinced was created as a character who epitomized everything that was wrong with women.

    That being said, I have no desire to see this movie, and if I have to listen to Kim Catrall talk about sex one more time in an interview, I’m going to throw up.

    Kim, you’re 62 years old…have a little dignity, woman.

  16. says

    Ggreen, but so many of these “stereotypical” gay men (the flamboyance, etc) AREN’T acting, but people like you think they are. You think it’s all a big act because they’re not ashamed to be themselves.

  17. Sailingsam says

    I just saw it! It was really fabulous..funny and dramatic at the same time. Don’t miss it! Don’t listen to some of the cynical and bitter comments posted here…

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