Don't Ask, Don't Tell | Military | News

A Gay Soldier's Coming Out Story: VIDEOS


In a series of YouTube videos, a faceless soldier who says he is from the Bible Belt, stationed in Europe, and deployed to the Middle East, discusses the anticipation surrounding "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" repeal, and  chronicles the process of coming out to friends and fellow service members.


The repeal of 'DADT' is currently in a 60-day waiting period following its certification at the end of July. The ban on serving openly should be lifted at the end of September.

Follow-up videos:

There are a few more on his YouTube page.

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  1. So proud of this soldier for sharing his struggle and journey with coming out. I hope this helps someone also that's struggling know (s)he's not alone.

    Posted by: Stella | Aug 9, 2011 12:28:28 PM

  2. What an incredibly brave and truthful man! And why is it that this country doesn't want "people like him" defending us?

    Posted by: Nathan | Aug 9, 2011 12:57:09 PM

  3. @ nathan - because soldiers are usually glorified & considered heroes.

    Posted by: samsara | Aug 9, 2011 1:14:14 PM

  4. This Soldier is a HERO> I've watched all of his YouTubes and he is as brave as any active duty man or woman out there.

    Posted by: Mike | Aug 9, 2011 2:03:19 PM

  5. So great of this young man to chronicle this time in the military. Hope when the deadline is finally here all goes well for him and all our other brave and committed soldiers who can finally be open about all aspects of their lives.

    Posted by: Erin Van Schaack | Aug 9, 2011 3:00:54 PM

  6. I think you are awesome. You are a very brave man to be doing this. I was in law enforcement for 20 years and I couldn't come out till I retired and left the city where I worked. Now in Dallas and it's cool to all those people back home. Just had to say how proud I am of you. Be safe over there. Can't wait to see and hear more.

    Posted by: Rogerindallas | Aug 9, 2011 3:12:01 PM

  7. I've been subbed to his channel for some time and I love his videos. The overwhelming positive comments he receives is heart warming.

    Posted by: sylvatica | Aug 9, 2011 3:13:21 PM

  8. You're doing a great and courageous thing! Thank you and good luck!

    Posted by: Barney McComas | Aug 9, 2011 3:14:10 PM


    Posted by: JULIAN DYLAN DELA ROSA | Aug 9, 2011 3:53:25 PM

  10. I agree with Larry...not familiar with where he is with this whole process and don't know the whole story here , but let HIM post his link Craig.

    Posted by: Texn | Aug 9, 2011 4:34:16 PM

  11. I'm really proud of you! I am impressed you're documenting your process. My partner is currently deployed and has struggled with major issues regarding her sexual orientation. This is her 2nd deployment, her first one left her very angry and lost. I feel a lot of that had to do with her being unable to share anything about her personal life while deployed. It's very sad that a community of soldiers serve and risk their lives but have nowhere near the support other soldiers may receive. It's hard enough being away from home and in harm's way. God Bless All troops! Let's all support ALL our troops!

    Posted by: Dee | Aug 9, 2011 4:35:52 PM

  12. Such a unique way of portraying a story that is similar for thousands of gay and lesbian soldiers!

    Posted by: Jim | Aug 9, 2011 4:41:46 PM

  13. I'm so proud of you for doing these videos. Very profound. I believe America is pushing forward to a brand new future for us. xoxo

    Posted by: David Creel | Aug 9, 2011 6:43:13 PM

  14. I've removed two comments which posted the servicemember's Facebook info, both left by the same person. That person has now been blocked, for obvious reasons. Not cool. If someone does it again, please let us know. Thanks.

    Posted by: Andy Towle | Aug 9, 2011 8:33:05 PM

  15. Delete the Facebook link. NOT COOL.

    Posted by: David M | Aug 9, 2011 8:58:47 PM

  16. Thank you Andy.

    Posted by: David M | Aug 9, 2011 9:13:30 PM

  17. This is incredible. It is incredibly sad that such extreme measures have to be taken by a man brave enough to sign up for military service and find himself in harm's way in a Middle East battle zone (presumably). I bet the prospect of doing these videos caused him more fear than the prospect of facing down terrorists. That simply shows the lamentable insanity of priorities in our country and the deplorable way in which we treat our fellow citizens, not to mention family members.

    I salute this soldier, and look forward to his eventual story coming out, as it were, for all of the world to admire.

    Posted by: So Left I'm Right | Aug 9, 2011 10:01:29 PM

  18. I hope he realizes that coming out is a lifelong process. I'm still asked if I have a wife. My answer is I'm a widower, my husband died. There will always be one person to whom to come out.

    It may be difficult when he comes out to the girlfriend he mentioned.

    Posted by: Mike in the Tundra | Aug 9, 2011 11:31:48 PM

  19. What an amazing set of documentary vids, plus a super cool servicemember.

    The best part was his friend being "cool" with him being gay and the banter that followed. His friend laughingly saying "look, but don't touch"...followed by a rejoinder that (he's not interested since) his friend is a "ginger" and then his friend saying, "Naw, I'm more a Pillsbury dough boy."

    Thanks to both of them (and the rest of our military) for serving our country.

    Posted by: TruthSeeker_Too | Aug 10, 2011 7:07:34 AM

  20. I've lived in the "Bible Belt" all my life and wonder where his southern accent is?

    Posted by: David | Aug 10, 2011 7:55:38 AM

  21. wait - what's wrong with posting his FB link?

    Posted by: tcw | Aug 10, 2011 12:12:17 PM

  22. Soldiers are not heroes, They might not be bad guys, but a hero is someone who helps people selflessly and has a strong concept of right and wrong.

    Don't lessen the word by applying it random people or killers. There are a thousand ways this kid could become a hero and being a soldier is not one of them.

    Posted by: Fenrox | Aug 10, 2011 1:07:00 PM

  23. @ FENROX: second only in evil to those who make militaries necessary are cretins like you who deny they ARE necessary. Fortunately, few in the world are graduates, like you, of the School of Bumper Sticker Cliches. If there were more, we'd be dead—or in concentration camps.

    Until proven otherwise, this soldier IS a hero for being willing to risk his life for others. Contrast that with yourself, who's already proven you're an idiot not worth such sacrifice.

    Posted by: | Aug 10, 2011 1:36:47 PM

  24. The deleted facebook link was open for all to see including friends, relationship info and wall, which is careless on the part of the user, but I am glad that that link has been removed. Kudos Andy!

    Posted by: Larry | Aug 10, 2011 5:09:14 PM

  25. TCW: WTF? Really? Are you that ignorant to his personal journey and what he is doing? Really? After I saw his FB link posted I sent an email to Andy asking for it to be removed and to this soldier telling him what happened so he can protect himself. No one should know who he is until he is ready to tell people. End of story.

    Posted by: David M | Aug 11, 2011 12:32:16 AM

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