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Jesus Rebranded: VIDEO

Jesus Rebranded

Because if there is one of Jesus' lessons that has gone woefully unaddressed, it is His message of the holy virtues of capitalism. Just in time for Christmas, Mark Fiore brings us a video of Jesus Rebranded. Press the Messiah's sacred heart and hear words of divine inspiration such as:

Capitalism is the reason for the season!

You can serve both God and money.  Go forth and profit!

Go, sell your possessions, and use the money to . . . start a growing, profitable business!  Come, follow me.

Check it out, AFTER THE JUMP...

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FOX News Anchor Megyn Kelly: Santa and Jesus Were White — VIDEO

Kelly

Megyn Kelly and a FOX News panel discuss a Slate article by Aisha Harris suggesting that it's time for the stereotypical white Santa to get a makeover. Kelly is not going to let that happen, and by the way, Jesus is white too.

Watch, AFTER THE JUMP...

P.S. - How 'bout a gay Santa?

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Family Research Council VP Jerry Boykin: Jesus 'Was A Man's Man' - VIDEO

Boykin

At William Jessup University's Men's Prayer Breakfast several months ago, Family Research Countil Executive Vice-President Jerry Boykin assured the audience that Jesus was not feminine, but rather a hulking guy with muscles. Boykin's talk, on the "4 P's of Biblical Manhood," took issue with the feminization of Jesus in imagery and discussions in churches around the country. "Part of the problem is that we've lost our understanding of who Jesus was," he began, asking, "Do you think he looked like this effeminate picture we always see?" 

Right Wing Watch reports:

As Boykin explained, Jesus was a carpenter and stone mason for most of his life, which required him to be constantly lifting heavy pieces of wood and stone. All this lifting, in turn, meant that Jesus had calluses on his hands and "big, bulging biceps, big ole veins popping out of his arms, thin waist, [and] strong shoulders."

"He was a man," Boykin said. "He was a man's man, but we feminized him in the church ... He was a tough guy and that's the Jesus that I want to be like. That's the side that I want to be like. But we've feminized Jesus in the church and the men can't identify with him anymore; not the kind of men that I want to hang out with, they can't identify with this effeminate Jesus that we've tried to portray. He was a tough guy. He was a man's man."

Watch, AFTER THE JUMP...

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Gavin 'Captain Stubing' MacLeod Says the 'Love Boat' Theme is About Coming to Jesus: VIDEO

Macleod

Gavin MacLeod, who played Captain Stubing on the classic 70's and 80's TV show The Love Boat, tells the anti-gay American Family Association radio show 'Today's Issues' that the show's theme song is all about coming to Jesus.

LoveboatSaid MacLeod:

"'Love exciting and new, come aboard, he's expecting you'. If you listen to the lyrics it's all about Jesus. It's a whole new approach to that song. I do that whenever I get into a group of believers, because it gave me - I said, wow, the Lord didn't tell me about that until how many years we were off the air. And it's really about 'Come aboard, Jesus will take care of you. There's a new love waiting for you. A love that will never let you down'."

Watch, AFTER THE JUMP...

(h/t jeremy hooper)

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Gene Robinson: 'Jesus Must Be So Embarrassed' About Religious-Based Opposition to ENDA

Gay retired Episcopal Bishop Gene Robinson rips religious-based opposition to the Employment Non-Discrimination Act in a piece in the Huffington Post:

RobinsonFor instance, the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops is vigorously opposing ENDA, asserting that their right to discriminate based on sexual orientation and gender identity is essential to Catholics' religious liberty. Now stop, and just take that in for a moment. A Church, dedicated to following the man known for his outreach and compassion for the marginalized, petitioning the government to be exempted from the fair treatment of marginalized and vulnerable LGBT people. It takes my breath away.

Can you imagine what Jesus might have said to St. Peter if the disciple had requested an exemption from Jesus' command to "love your enemies?!" What if disciples James and John had argued with Jesus about whether or not "love your neighbor as yourself" actually should apply to them in all cases? What would Jesus have said to the good, religious people of his time when they asked for an exemption to Jesus' command to "love one another as I have loved you," based of course upon their deeply-held, religious beliefs?

I don't know what he would have said. But the shortest verse in all of scripture probably describes what he would have done upon hearing their request: "Jesus wept."


Mrs. Betty Bowers Does the 'Harlem Shake' with Jesus: VIDEO

Jesus

America's Best Christian joins the meme of the moment.

Watch, AFTER THE JUMP...

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