I'm Gay | News | Rugby | Sports | Thomas 'Bozzy' Bosworth

18-Year-Old Welsh Rugby Player Describes Coming Out to Mom, Team in Emotional Video: WATCH

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Thomas “Bozzy” Bosworth, an 18-year-old rugby player from Wales, came out of the closet earlier this month to his mother, and his team. He also explained why he did so an emotional Facebook post and a follow-up YouTube video, Outsports reports.

As the captain of his rugby team in Quaker Yards, Wales, Bosworth was trying to reconcile being a macho jock with being gay and finally decided to tell the world who is he.

In the video, Bosworth talks about coming out to his mom and team, and the reaction to his Facebook post.

Watch the emotional and inspiring video, AFTER THE JUMP...

Bosworth's Facebook post read, in part:

To clear all the gossip up and shit that has been going around about me. Yes I am gay and I never choose this and it’s the hardest thing Iv ever had to deal with in my life. It’s the hardest thing to come to terms with when you don’t want it but you can never get rid of the feeling . I know it may come as a very big shock to people. I had planned to slowly tell people but as rumours have come out I had to tell my family and the thoughts and feeling you have are the hardest and most guilty and disappointed feelings I have ever had.

So if you have any questions or a problem please mail me or delete me if you don’t like it. I am sorry but it is the real me. I would really like to thank my close friends and especially my rugby team as I honestly thought I would be to ashamed to ever carry on playing rugby. But the boys have showed and proved to me that my thought of them were wrong and I’m so grateful they are the best bunch of players and true friends that i could ask for.

I’m am honoured to have the friends I have from school and rugby and truly can’t believe how supportive they are. This is the hardest thing I have faced but it has to be faced as rumour do spread. I just felt like this was the easiest was for people to know the truth and not have to explain to everyone separately. If anyone is going through the same thing never ever be afraid to contact me I know how hard it is and I will never ever share what you tell me.

Watch, AFTER THE JUMP...

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Comments

  1. You GO, Bozzy! Welcome Out!

    Posted by: Kile Ozier | Aug 27, 2012 10:01:11 AM


  2. well done, young vanguard!

    another brother doing the right thing.

    Llongyfarchiadau!

    Posted by: LittleKiwi | Aug 27, 2012 10:11:04 AM


  3. The only way you can be a straight acting gay man is if you exclusively sleep with women, even though you are gay.

    Straight acting does not mean masculine and "queer" men should stop using that term.

    Ignoring that, welcome to the the team Bozzy, officially at least.

    Posted by: Blake | Aug 27, 2012 10:14:53 AM


  4. Wow- sweet guy and great story...... hope it wasn't too disrespectful to be thinking of Matt Lucas' character Daffyd- the accent- just too awesome!!!

    Posted by: scott | Aug 27, 2012 10:19:05 AM


  5. It's like a window into when I was that age and being gay seemed like such a big deal, this huge obstacle instead of just, eh, part of who you are. That his family and teammates accepted him immediately shows that things are better, and more people coming out like he's doing is part of the reason why.

    One of the most surprising developments of the past few years is the number of sports teams and players who have come out in support of gay players, joined the You Can Play initiative or made It Gets Better videos. It's easy to say that doesn't really mean anything, doesn't change anything, but to young people Bozzy's age and younger it can mean a lot. Where that change is really being demonstrated is in high school and collegiate sports, where more and more players are openly gay and finding acceptance.

    Posted by: Caliban | Aug 27, 2012 11:01:23 AM


  6. Am I allowed to make a joke about Dafydd no longer being the only GAY in the villAGE?

    God bless the Welsh and their melodious vowels!

    Posted by: NaughtyLola | Aug 27, 2012 11:06:11 AM


  7. I admire Tom and his bravery. He's got some way to go to get over his self-hating attitude (that would the whole "internalized homophobia" thing), but he's started that journey. I think he'll be okay.

    Posted by: teegee | Aug 27, 2012 11:07:44 AM


  8. to blake's point, there's nothing less-masculine than identifying as "Straight-Acting" - it's the calling card of the cowards, that shows that one is still a Boy and not yet a Man.

    but it's a common thing to hear from the Newbies. he'll learn. he's already ahead of the game.

    :)

    Posted by: LittleKiwi | Aug 27, 2012 11:09:07 AM


  9. That accent is delightful. :)

    Good on him. Welcome out, Bozzy!

    Posted by: The Milkman | Aug 27, 2012 11:20:18 AM


  10. I guess this means no more sex with his teammates. :(

    Posted by: anon | Aug 27, 2012 12:03:55 PM


  11. I'm not so sure that his ranting about how much he HATES being gay and how he would do anything to change the fact but he's stuck with it, is such a good message for other kids struggling with their sexuality. His video sounds like an intro to an Exodus or NARTH promotional video.

    I must have watched a different video than other people here. I can't imagine how everyone thinks this was a positive statement just because he came out.

    Posted by: TampaZeke | Aug 27, 2012 12:25:42 PM


  12. OK, so he's still got some growing up to do. Who doesn't? The fact is, realizing you're gay is also a realization that certain things that most people take for granted are NOT going to simply "just happen" for you. He's still a little stuck on what he won't have, but he'll get there.

    Posted by: BGKev | Aug 27, 2012 12:45:18 PM


  13. @Tampazeke - "I'm not so sure that his ranting about how much he HATES being gay and how he would do anything to change the fact but he's stuck with it, is such a good message for other kids struggling with their sexuality."

    Actually I found that statement very refreshing, because it is open and honest. How many of us, at one time or another, hated the fact we were LGBTQ? Bozzy will come to terms with that - in fact, I think that, with the support of his family and teammates, that 'hatred of being gay' is probably already a notch or two lower than it was before he came out.

    Congratulations, young man! 'You have just taken your first step into a wider world.'

    Posted by: Oz in OK | Aug 27, 2012 12:45:26 PM


  14. @TampaZeke I think he was just being hyperbolic in the video. He seems very well adjusted based on his Twitter account.

    Posted by: Blake | Aug 27, 2012 12:53:10 PM


  15. Straight-acting is fine (the only ones who complain are those who can't do it), effeminate is fine (if that's what you have to call it), black is fine, white is fine, preferences are fine, we all hav'em, looks like we're supposed to. So many wonderful people on here, the features and the commenters. Guess I'm feeling good today. This little ginger bozzy helped. Thanks.

    Posted by: UFFDA | Aug 27, 2012 1:40:49 PM


  16. Actually, UFFDA, the only people who use the phrase Straight-acting are the ones who haven't come to terms with being gay yet. The ones who complain know what they're talking about.

    Or are you one of those interwebz trolls who comes on to be an incorrect miserable idiot for the sake of being an incorrect miserable idiot?

    Posted by: Punked | Aug 27, 2012 1:57:27 PM


  17. I think we all see a bit of ourselves in "Bozzy's" story somewhere.
    A lot of young, gay people feel like there is no one out there who is visible and gay who is "like me," whether in the media or in the community.
    Most gay people who COULD be role models in small, conservative towns are afraid to come out, and a whole lot of what we see in the media is still designed to either make the gay person stereotyped, figuratively neutered or even invisible to readers/viewers/ listeners.
    Bozzy's favorite teacher could die and still today the obituary is likely to say that he "had no wife" instead of "he leaves to mourn his loving husband, John."
    Coming out has an echoing effect on the whole community around you. When I came out (fearing all the same things Bozzy feared), I saw the attitudes of my friends improve, and I eventually learned how my being open had nudged several others (both aquaintances and strangers) to do likewise.
    Bozzy will not even know who all he influences by doing this, but someone will surely be encouraged to live his (or her) truth after seeing him do it first.

    Posted by: GregV | Aug 27, 2012 2:11:49 PM


  18. well said, Greg. I think a great many of us went through a similar phase. the reluctant homosexuals, if you will. and then that transient phase where you find a false-sense of security in adopting a non-identity identity. the "i'm gay but im not like other gays" thing. that mindset where you think "acknowledging" your homosexuality is the only thing you need to do. it is, of course, merely the first step.

    band this is, blessedly, just a transient thing. at least for those who allow their spines to grow and learn to live, actually live, out loud.

    the closet brigade never loses that mindset, alas, no matter how old they get. and that's why they never fully get out of the closet.

    the ripple-effects will continue, and more and more people will understand the value in opening the doors for others.

    Posted by: LittleKiwi | Aug 27, 2012 2:20:03 PM


  19. It brought tears to my eyes. He is a great young man and it sounds like he has a lot of great straight friends.

    Posted by: andrew | Aug 27, 2012 2:22:47 PM


  20. "The only way you can be a straight acting gay man is if you exclusively sleep with women, even though you are gay."

    @Blake: It really goes way beyond just "sleeping with women.". I think most gay men and women have experienced the insecurity of being "straight-acting" at some point, often for decades.

    In addition to (or instead of) "sleeping with" the opposite sex, it can mean dating the opposite sex, having sex with them, maybe even impregnating/getting pregnant to provide (false) "evidence" of straightness. It can mean filtering every word that comes out of your mouth, answering questions like "who are you into?" ("Well, I'd love to get into Suzie's pants") or "what are your hobbies?" (Maybe you've even hidden your interest in cooking ever since someone in kindergarten said it was "gay" when you tried an Easy Bake oven) with false statements that make you feel like you're avoiding gay stereotypes at all cost. You turn your head when a girl in a bikini walks by just so your friends will say "caught you looking!" and you've added to your daily wuota of "prentending to be straight" actions.
    "Acting straight" is a neurotic way to live. But that neurosis can be incorporated into every minute of every day until a person feels free to finally be himself.

    "...queer men should stop using that term.".
    He never claimed to be "queer." Every time I hear that word I hear "weird/strange/odd" and I wish people wouldn't automatically label gay people that way.

    Posted by: GregV | Aug 27, 2012 2:31:50 PM


  21. I just missed getting drenched in a rainstorm, saved some money on groceries with a lot of coupons, and turned on Towleroad to find that Kiwi is in one of his rare "no hostility at all" moods. This is my lucky day. But then Andrew may just bring me down to earth by saying something nasty like "turn down your vibrator, Mary."

    As to this young rugby player, I'm glad he's gotten some peace by telling the world he's gay. It's good to hear that his family and friends accept him. Maybe their action can inspire others.

    Posted by: Mary | Aug 27, 2012 2:38:30 PM


  22. Good job, keep up the good work.

    Posted by: Mike | Aug 27, 2012 2:39:15 PM


  23. "straight-acting" means "I live every day looking over my shoulder worrying about what The Straights are thinking about me"

    greg, you nailed it.

    and no queer men use the term "straight-acting". some gay men do. but not self-identifying queer men. the whole thing about self-identifying as Queer is that you are empowered by NOT following a perceived norm

    Queer - unusual, unique, less common, of a different point of view, a deviation from the norm.

    :)

    Posted by: LittleKiwi | Aug 27, 2012 2:40:36 PM


  24. TEEGEE: You took the words out of my mouth (well said)
    This is a brave young man, he's got a way to go, he'll go far. I only wish that all of society could be as accepting as his family and friends seem to have been.
    (Everyone is correct the accent is adorable and he does sound like Daffyd)

    Posted by: I wont grow up | Aug 27, 2012 3:43:08 PM


  25. Congratulations to the cute and courageous Bozzy.

    Posted by: Thomas | Aug 27, 2012 4:26:00 PM


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