SNL’s Weekend Update got into Trump’s impeachment trial last week.
Jost led off the segment, noting that Rep. Adam Schiff was on his television for so long, when he turned the TV off “there was still an outline of him burned into the screen.”
Jost then summed up the proceedings: “What happened was, Democrats spent three days laying out in great detail how they believe President Trump has been the most egregious abuser of power in American history. And then Republicans laid out their defense, the shrug emoji.”
Jost then brought up a photo of Mitch McConnell, “seen here calmly watching an orphanage burn.”
McConnell defended his plan for the trial, saying, “The country is waiting to see if we can rise to the occasion,” added Jost, quipping, “I would maybe say you’re not rising to the occasion, considering one senator fell asleep, Rand Paul was doing a crossword puzzle and some Republican senators even brought fidget spinners to play with. I assume this symbolized how the Founding Fathers are spinning in their graves.”
Michael Che had another take on the trial: “It was like a four-day long PowerPoint. This is supposed to be Trump’s punishment, not mine. This whole impeachment is like a bad episode of ‘Maury.’ There’s all this evidence that Trump clearly cheated and Republicans are still like, ‘But Maury, he loves me.’ Trump is so confident he’s going to win, he’s using Jeffrey Epstein’s lawyer to represent him. Talk about credibility — who’s his character witness, R. Kelly?”
Jost then looked at Trump’s media appearances during the week, in which he expressed the need to protect American geniuses like Elon Musk … and Thomas Edison.
Said Jost: “We have to protect Thomas Edison? I think that’s a line Nic Cage yells in National Treasure.”
Weekend Update also looked at the audio of Trump telling Lev Parnas to “take out” Marie Yovanovitch, and Rudy Giuliani’s podcast, ‘Common Sense’.
“It’s the first podcast ever recorded and uploaded accidentally from a pants pocket.”
In another segment, Melissa Villaseñor sang about the Oscar nominees and the snub of female directors, and the preponderance of “white male rage.”
Weekend Update also covered Derek Jeter, the first aircraft carrier named after an African-American sailor, equal pay, Mr. Peanut’s death, a Gritty assault, and a goat with a human face.
Finally, travel expert Carrie Krum (Aidy Bryant) had some insider tips on winter getaways.